Do you change shape to
Slipping through these days
Liquid dreamer
Faulty against lines in the sand
You have eight faces on a round head
Only irony would permit
Octagon facets of your expression
To reflect one another
If the earth could talk
Oh the stories she would spew
Perhaps she is the only true triumphant
Yet we press against her
Resisting the way she would show us
All the love she has given
Yet, race to the moon
Love to the blue stars in the black skies
Will we tarnish them too
When we reach where their light touches
Paying no respects, giving no courtesy
To light beyond our own
We are never satisfied, never happy
With where we are
We hate the journey, fear the end
Desire to burn so bright
Pushing the super in supernova past our thermosphere
When no one in this solar system cares
And as if any creature, animal, or vegetable
In the next solar system can see your flares
When nothing matters
What do you do
How will you burn
When the exosphere will one day pull to earth
Every atom we are composed of splits
Phosphate and nitrogen sin against each other
As if it was their first day in the garden
Knowing, time is our only true forbidden fruit

And I Promise

To love you to the ends of the earth
And I promise to save you from all the nightmares
To show you the love in my eyes
To keep you until I die
I will follow your heart
And I will be your blanket
I will protect you from danger
And I will be your savior
I will break all the curses
And I will make your wounds better
I am the key to the lock of the chains that bind you
I will hide you from the demons that seek to find you
To touch your hair
To protect your heart
To walk beside you and match your foot steps
I will be your bridge over troubled water
I will never lie

There is nothing I cant save you from except from myself
I am the only one who could hurt you
And that is why I am leaving
I will go to another world
With my white flag unfurled
Goodbye sweet love I must keep my promise
Goodbye darling you are the only one I will miss

My soul has an echo
Even when I say nothing
When I do not call out
To demons
In the darkness
Perhaps only when
Rocks from the precipice
From poorly shodden cliffs
Shoot into the abyss
It is your name
That calls back to me
It is you who resides
In my deepest depths
My soul has an echo
The wanderings of my heart
Have made you their muse
No matter my song
You are my melody

A poet never forgets
The way it felt to feel

They may never remember
The time, date or the place

But they will know the colors
Of the falling leaves

The sound of your breath
In the fall wind

The dreams they lost upon
The desolate shore

They will always know
They could never want more

A poet will always remember
How it felt

To be in the perfect
Complete moment

They will never forget
Who was holding their heart

They will never know
What was going on around

For they saw to clearly
What was happening inside

They will never be able to lose sight
Of how your eyes turned to liquid gold

When they kissed your lips
The words that filled their head

And how every moment is a
Reflection of their love

A poet can never lose
The moments in that light

A poet will never chose a different
Melody than the beating of your heart

It will always be enough for them
To see into your soul

They may never cross an ocean
But they will survive rough waters

They may never learn to fly
But they know the clouds in the sky

They can kindle a fire from words
That have been burning in their hearts

And they will always remember
That they will never forget your heart

You did not love me less
You did not start to ignore
You did not look at me with pity
You did not slam the door

You did not swear at me
You did not turn away
You did not close you eyes
You did not make me stay

You held me by the hand
You looked me in the eye
You made me feel the love
And that's what made me cry

I wasn't used to this
Being treated with respect
I did not know what kind was
Now I must reflect

Your lips were the edge of the world
I find myself
Forever falling

Today is the day
We said our goodbyes
You hugged me so hard
I almost started to cry

You will get on that plane
And fly away home
And leave me here
Like a fallen stone

I smiled at you
As best as I could
What I felt inside
Was anything but good

Like a leaf from a tree
The last one to fall
You turned your back
Without another call

You didn't want to
Ever have to part
But our time was
borrowed, from the start

It couldn't be worse
You said you never felt better
But that lie on your lips
Was worth a thousand a letter

I'll write to you
When you are away
And you will read my words
On the next day

And the day after that
You will remember
All the joy we had
In the month of December

So come walk these halls
In the corridors of my mind
Looking through the pieces
And see what you find

Memories with 'X's
Spray painted on
Pieces of poems
And parts of a song

I can picture your smile
But can't see your eyes
Without all the tears
That mask you disguise

You hide from me
All of your thoughts
Tried to be strong
At your own costs

You wanted a fight
I wouldn't give in
So you left me in tears
Neither of us to win

"I'm leaving"
Like a slap to the face
But if you could, you,
Would stay in this place

So I'll wait, for you
With a painted on smile
Because all these days
Made it an hour feel like a mile

Farewell my friend
Have a safe fly
And think of me
When you take the sky

Seek the sun at the end of its journey
Chase the light past the clouds

The dark is scared it will hide
Will you stay and be the one

It is finished

It is done

You don't have to!
I know you want to
I know you try
But listen outside of your head
Cuz what is in there
Is a lie.

You are worth it
You are loved you
My ray of sunshine
From God above

Put it down
Let me hold you
You aren't a slave
No one sold you

You are your own master
It doesn't have to be faster

Whatever you want
Just please not this
Let nothing touch your skin
Unless its a kiss

You are blessed
With a beautiful smile
So put it down
Just wait a while

No one is like you
Nobody comes close
It doesn't matter
You don't need a perfect nose

You matter
So much in my heart
I will walk this journey, beside you
From the start

It's okay.
I know.
It hurts.
A lot.
But, my beautiful friend, that is all the more reason to stop.
You have self-control
Don't let a stupid piece of metal or flame
Take this toll

You don't have to pay
You owe no debts
So just wait a minute
Don't hurt yourself yet

Breathe in the air
It wont be your last
Let your lungs
Erase the past

Smile a little
At the corners of your lips
Feel the love
Like a gentle kiss

Atleast one person
Doesn't want you to cry
They want you happy
Your eyes to be dry

And if you cant think
Of a single soul
Who doesn't want you broken
But needs you whole

Let me be
Your sweetest memory
Your north star
"It's enough for me."

I'm a stranger
But I am your friend
And I will walk with you
Until the end

I know your heart
I can guess your story
How you were destroyed
And lost all your glory

But even you
Can shine again
I'll take your hand
Just tell me when

Just because you spelt a word wrong
Or maybe said the wrong thing
Maybe someone left, and they wont come back
Be happy for what you have, not what you lack

You never know
How things will change
I just know
They wont be the same

So just a minute
Or maybe an hour
Before tomorrow
And it stings in the shower

You arms are your wings
I want you to fly
You can live and dream
Don't chose to die <3

Xoxo

i have a broken heart
dont know where to start

found a place
met your face
stood in line
for a time
dont know how
cant slow down

make it up
make it fall down
love me now
take my heart to town

by my joy ride
my happy place
be the smile
on my face

like in a song
be my muse
make a beat
we will never lose

On occasion,
When feeling particularly human
I sit in the rain
Let the sky come on to me

Last night I was hurting
I felt six years old, again
No matter how loud the music plays
How hard I cover my ears
I cannot change
The way my mothers voice sounds
It echoes from the inside

I do not remember you
You are a strange man
A nightmare
When you crawl into my bed
Your touch all too familiar
I am a mute
To your headless horseman
We are both ghosts
You, passing through my body
Haunting, screaming, possessing
And I, a detached soul
Slipping from a warm body

I ask myself
Maybe my father never knew love
That is why he cannot show it
I turn to look at my youngest brother
I never knew love either
But to him
I cannot help but show it

Run me back
To the house on the hill
To where the trees grow thicker
Perhaps that is where I get my skin from
Today, it will not hold my rage
Still, I feel contained

Memory etched on a cage of pages
Though storms rise higher
And the ocean rages
And burns like wild fire

Emotions carved into chests of flesh
Open a solid oaken heart
Never let the beat rest
Eons of electricity to make it start

Souls of skies in darkened glass
Fogged beyond recognition
Like trying to drink grass
Is the way my eyes listen

Beyond today's vault
And yesterday's filing cabinet
Lies a raw un-denied fault
By a poet who dreams out of habit

I will die tonight
As I have done before
Still I must remember
To say my prayers
For tomorrow is a new day
Bathed in new light
I could not bear
To tarnish her
With the memory of my sins

This empty bottle has told me all her secrets
Still I hope for more
Like a thirst unquenchable

I tear away at myself
At everything that I have become
The lining of my lungs separates
And I pull her out of my throat,
and she slips through my teeth
As a ghost in the night
And a final breath
That had been spent to soon
She was told to wait
For the ticking of the clock to be silenced

These dreams, they cling
To the corners of my skull
Knocking together in the night
For warmth, for stamina
If each be just a drop of water
It is still enough to drown all else out

Like change in my pockets
Clutched between clammy fingers
And rings that turn my thieving fingers green
Are these memories I hold of you
I dare not let them slip through my fingers
Yet here I find myself
All spent out

These thieving fingers
Have stolen days
Stolen hearts
And left nothing in return
But two or three petals from a fading flower

Such is life
But to awaken each day
And to look for sleep at the end
Yet we paint our faces
With our bleeding, broken hearts
Oh some smiles, how red they are
Try as you might
You cannot wipe away the pain
So let it bleed
Until it has bled out
And still scars hold things together tighter than your hands ever could

light up the walls of my paper thin soul
such that I would burn out
would you be more careful
if my fuse was shorter than it is now

this fuse; she has been blown
out of water and reality alike
many a time, and many a time again
when consent was but a dying lie

and this she calls her dying art
to live each day as if a few had never happened
as if such shadows did not cling to her heels
like every memory was a not a venomous snake

if you bit into her memories
they would not taste like your own
the are unfamiliar in their rendering
and foolish in their aftertaste

the lingering scent of midnight tears
and a thousand scars, each handmade
wrought into her body and the backs of her eyes alike
only some will heal, and only some fade

others, like your own eyes
you forgot they are their
until you turn to the glass
and find only your soul looking back

what could you shut out
if you had a door in your mind
some nights would you lock it
like you lock away me in your life

to stow away like voyagers on a ship
not a care to where it would go
only that it takes you far and it takes you from
all that you have known and that has forced its memory upon you

silent and serpentine these dreams pass
through my shoulders and across my cheeks
into the hollowness of my head
to writhe in agony in a dying light

and still these lights they flicker in the wind
would that you would close the window
but still my soul shivers in anticipation
of the knife to my heart, oh Ceaser's ghost hear me

would you even hear the depth of my scream
as it calls to you in the shadows of my mind
here I hold you, twixt hand and sternum
such that you would ever cling to me

I am but a fool, secure in my own folly
and that which I stand upon is treacherous
the closing of my eyes will not steady my legs
and stamina oh she has abandoned us long ago

I am weak in all but that I have done before
the anxiousness of my bones is a crutch and I crumble
like the walls of a tower without a foundation
and such is this I stand upon

soon I too shall fall into the earth
her waters shall reach me in the end of days
and pull me out, to be one with wind and waves
oh a memory sunk to the abyss

such is this
a candle heart
and a paper thin dream
just enough life
to ignite a soul

burning out
among the stars

A house poem

I just love to think of you
Your memory is a spring day

When silence is bearable
And when the pin drops

When pain is approachable
And when the day stops

When clouds are dry
And the fall from the sky

When eyes are blind
Only then will I die

The familiarity hurts more than the rest
I remember, but I do not know.
Who was she?
And what has made her whom she is now?
It wasn't what had changed within her, it was how it happened.
Sometimes just a taste is an overdose
Only a fool would ask a bird where it got it's wings
Some things are just so, but this pain
I cannot help but question it
I don't know what to look for, let alone where to find it
I don't have to sleep to dream
Does it have to mean that it is right?

*foolish me

Undress my heart
Let her feel the cold chill
Of November midnight winds
The howl of the coyote
Is music to her rhythm

The lighting isn't right
For us to fall in love
Sit with me in the darkness
Wait with me
For stars to come

I should be sleeping

Boundaries protect and boundaries hide
When you live all of the lies
The lines are here to stand behind
The choices for you to decide
When all the faces resemble the others
You must divide child and mother
When the price to be paid is your life
When you wield dagger and knife
The faces that look on in expectation
How many ways can you destroy a nation
When the winning ticket is drawn from a bowl
And you miss your chance and fate takes its toll
When the whole world can see what you did wrong
When you cant find a home where you belong
The guidelines are way to specific
And the scenes from my life are to horrific
The babies cry and the screams break your heart
When the forbidden fruit you bit just falls apart
The blood you spill is on your hands
And you are chased through moon lite lands
The stains of sweat run heavy on your brow
When you make the choice not to bow
A rude remark and a sharp blow
Trying to figure out what you don't know
The buzzard are circling high over head
You wish you could run but face your fears instead
When you make choices without rhyme or reason
And you need to run but choose treason
So many paths that intersect in the end
What hides behind the next bend
The curtains are drawn and you stand exposed
You turn the sign and the shop is closed
A lonely walk to an empty home
A life you live all alone

Please,

Don't ever tell me to go away

Because I will

And it will hurt like hell

I will miss you ever single **** day

I will want to be right next to you

But I won't be

I can't be

Because you made me think you didn't want me their

Right next to you

Where I belong

I feel it again...
... like I am drowning

I stare at the sea
It gives it’s loneliness to me
How long has it longed
To touch beyond the shore
To reach what is beyond
I do not know
What is in the deep
I am compelled
It eats away at me
High tide
Ebb and flow
There is no give and take here
Between the rocks and the shoals
We all succumb
To salt water sirens
We love
Because we fear
Give in to her
To the madness of the ocean

You can see bruises
Ripening on my apple skin

I don't want you to recognize them
If you placed your palms against them
Would they fit like key-in-lock

We all have our own unique fingerprints
Mine are frost bitten

I don't know what love is anymore
But I do know it hurts

Wishing I knew how fast the stars fly
Across the glass strewn sky

I cant be fully cooked
if I am:
       hot on the outside
       but lukewarm about you
       on the inside
       and my heart is still as
       cold as it was

You spilled your heart out
Like popcorn on the sidewalk

I am waiting the lights are blinding my eyes
I run across a beach to and endless shore

I watch you rise out of the sea
You always look so beautiful to me

The pain I went through to give birth to this love
It was all worth it I love watching you grow

The words the wind carried from your heart to mine
The waiting it took but it was worth it divine one

The endless road we walk together
The bond we hold no one can break

Your hands so rough and mind so soft
But together we are made to last

The fire doesn't burn when you are my shield
Oh darling just lay with me in this field of daisies

The ocean pulls your hand from mine
Be we remain forever locked in time

English has taught me many things
Today, I am stuck on this lesson
That any situation can be tense
Past, present, or future tense

This single drop of blood
Rivulating from my heart
Trying to run away
To be lost from the emotions

You trace your way
Down my scarred arms
And twist in agony
So deep into the night you dance

I fear you shall never return
You long for another system
With a steadier beat
And when the night comes

The trace you leave is sweet
I wiped you away
To forget the pain
But in this life

I drive myself insane

Stick to poems they never bite you in the back
Stick to the light and never look back