i love you so much
still burn with it
a gas lamp that will not extinguish
this pain distinguished
now that you're truly gone
no, you're no linguist
but you spoke my tongue

it's too much to reach out
always
i'll drown these naive dreams
with whatever's on hand
medicines
coughing
nothing is ever as it seems
especially when you do flips
just to convince yourself
it could ever come from her lips
moonshine and
longing

when there are no consequences
why would you feel the weight of your actions
when you are immune to repercussions
and you cannot be prosecuted under the law
respect for the law diminishes
and when markets fail to regulate themselves
and our litigators refuse to act
and greed overshadows our many needs
the country begins to fail
as Americans lose faith
and the vacuous bubble capitol hill is trapped in
continues to swell;
one wonders when it will pop

When one withholds their perspective,
This is the most sour grape.
That is like wine gone bad,
Caustic & acidic.
Destructive to the natural flow
Of the great amphoras.

and if you were?
my end all, be all
would that be so bad
clearly, you think so
so i should as so

you can drown out the lies
but the hand still writes
the tongue still wags
like the tail
tucked between legs;
they'll all come to a head

Looking for something casual?
Is it a hassle?
Juggling all the many things you say?
Contradicting hypocrite,
Who can't get out of her own way.

the beauty
of kindness
it's infinite surplus
the appreciation garnered
and it costs nothing,
priceless,
and more often than not
you're paid back,
even in just a smile

even in the ranks of the angels
there is no status
they could give you

They speak of absence & inaction -
Yet, 𝘪𝘯 𝘵𝘳𝘶𝘵𝘩,
¹ Such things do not exist.
Like imbalance,
These are merely perspectives.

Refulgence,
That a star should ever be penitent
For only having shone
For those who prefer the dark over light?
No.
The clouds hang heavy,
The hazy fog creeping in
Halts for some-
As for others that it overtakes,
There are those spared completely.
Like that it is arid for one,
The other views it as humid;
Your dry may be wet,
Their wet may be as the dirt of the desert.

Where in the world?!
What in the world?!

- Poseidon

How in the world?!
𝐖𝐡𝐞𝐧 𝐢𝐧 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐰𝐨𝐫𝐥𝐝?!
Why in the world?!

-Zeus

Wanna test it?!
Can we ¹perfect it?!

-Hades

stirring for you
from so far
as eddying currents do
with stars in the sky
in motion all around
as the tide tends to

how do you sleep
when it's a celestial body
you find divine
and sign your life away
to stay in the dark
to worship for all time

So many puddles;
There are the puddles of your planet,
There is an atmosphere of elements in vapors which puddle,
There is a heliosphere which puddles from forces like gravity -
So many degrees,
It staggers the mind to think.

Like oceans which ripple.
Like Electric arcing.
Like blades of grass growing.

somebody's ******
floating in my soft drink
I should have ordered hard

the ice is raw
lines still there
fresh from skating

and the atmosphere
in here
is something like a graveyard

you might ***** and moan
but I brood
like a hen over dead eggs
the stress builds
and gnaws at me
incessantly

Views from split fingers,
And words from a covered mouth.
Phone off the ringer;
Lights on, empty house.
Venom, stingers:
Hooks in, doped out.

you're a broken person


and i hope you mend

Vanish from me
Insecurity
She holds me down like gravity
And when she asks
Do you love me
It's not a part of me
But the whole

Heart and soul

If you left, I'd be empty
Only a vacant cavity
Never to be full,
If you leave, please
**** me
Cutting with blades, dull

lionheart
of literature
how long have you stood
in the background of my life
your drawings,
they all have their backs turned
hiding their faces

you write of the gods
but i am here, on earth
my mind not in the clouds
with thoughts of saintly and good things
rather more comparable to the gutter
which isn't to say they do not linger
drifting through my mind
to see them brought to life although,
i should like to
and with you
it just isn't possible
not now

you're on my mind
nearly all the time
and it kills me
to hear you say you're his
what is this
why did you reach out
i still don't know
i can't figure you out
how little has changed
is this a game
something to numb the pain
encased in that brain
that makes my heart beat
or are you just insane
then again, i can't help but entertain
firing every neuron, reviving what remains
douse you in affection
just to see you alight
like a neutron star
don't look too hard
you may find yourself blind,
awestruck, by her heavenly sight

headache, headcase
cause i'm ******* crazy
poor, long face
break my body
if you pay me
using

in space
it's a silence so deafening
screaming has no meaning
disassociating
to escape
this life
that doesn't satisfy me
in the clouds
shout
and let me know
when you come down
so i can catch you
re-entry can burn
it's something you still
haven't learned

i was never someone to you
i was something

on the outskirts
the very beginning
a torrent rains
like knives from the sky
and every man is a monsoon
and every woman a hurricane
God, the lord
help me

and I will submit,
on my knees,
if you want me to be

somewhere-in the absence of light
carry me out
somewhere out of sight
lay me down
and I'll tell the truth
petals falling all around
you can have them
if you want to

reach out
and grab the hand
i extend
while it stands
while i can
because times are getting worse
we'll all be tightening our purse
like we should have our lips
as the dollar dips
and we are served
just desserts

the cringe of nightly thoughts
that linger on past the dimming
of lights on the bedside
it's night like these
that keep alive
the torment I carry
and cannot relieve
no matter how hard
I might try
it's nights like these
I am still happy
to be alive

long-winded,
catch a breath friend
between words
the conversation needn't end
you speak, and you'll be heard

something left out,
something left out,
someone I left
and let go
so far
not so long ago
and I don't know
I'm not so experienced
with this love thing
you said a lot
but what's to be said
when you too left

god
i know why my mind
is so warped
but christ
climb back on the cross
and before you do
a favor of you,
heal another sick man?

i love you
but i can't put my trust in you
with no reasons to

A battle fought is never in vain
Whether the outcome's defeat, victory, surrender, or retreat
To peace, it's all the same
For civilities' sake
We could lay down our rifles
Walk away from the trifle
And dust we kicked up
Feign sickness
Acting like you chucked
Refuse service
Merchants of deaths ducked
Flee elsewhere
Instill a boat's deck with your trust
And hope it's helm steady
Cause Lord above knows
Which direction bears hell or heaven
And of both in this world there's plenty

the only advice
i can get
is what I don't want to hear
or can't, yet
it's these traits that endear
unwavering commitment to being a better man
the day next
it's the anxieties and fears
that keep us from
being everything we can be

things you said
play on repeat
in my head
this isn't how I want it
but at least you're okay

should i give up
on thoughts of us
as us
and not separate

call it bust
and quit
cause i'm ****
and a liar

stressin, cause i'm guessin
every moment
what you do
on fire

desire
is you
and pleasure falls through
no kiss compares

spring breath, for these winter lungs
your warm lips
the feeling of your hair
as i run my fingers

and share
every thought
even if you don't
or care

i come correct
and direct
straight from the heart
can pour out my chest

what's in my head
is a terminal of tracks
trains rushing past
with no destination

procrastination
and set my interal clock
back, one time last
rescind the old, new revisions

forget what came prior
close your eyes
when you tire
so close them, forever

no coming down now
trying to reach you
through the silence
has me wondering how
they did it in the past
back in the day
"simpler" times
of things denied
ages long of repression
regression, into what we were
like is the fashion of the day

play that
avant-garde, Archie
roll that stone,
HST
bust a nut, in a
case for the century
Woodward & Bernstein
convolut and confuse
and diffuse some of that tension rising
the crook with a room at Watergate
TRICKY ****
well known for the lying
you can infiltrate
and propagate hate
from here to Asia
but it's the folks at home
who will grab you by the *****
and castrate ya

You think me ******
For what seems to you to be a lack of caring
I cannot convince you of my care
If you refuse to believe so
Despite my efforts
So I relinquish doing so
Why should I waste the time that is so precious
On an issue which has no basis
And on a rationale you refuse to release
I haven't the time for such things
Really, no one does
But yet they fritter it away
For things that will never change

Not I

i can see
the end of me
my whole expense
in so many thousands of ways
like knives in my eyes
they don't go away
painfully sober and clearheaded
even high
i want to rip them out
leaving sockets
empty
and though tears run
they immediately dry

you have actually destroyed me as a person
i was thinking the other day
it really doesn't matter, to you
since you never saw me as one anyway
just your "favorite"

the nihilist says
she prolonged the inevitable
the pessimist says
just do it
and the optimist
is happy
for all you did

I wrote a draft
I'll circle back
when thoughts coalesce
instead of collapse
when I have
a better grasp
of what exactly I intend to mean

friends, family, strangers
can insult and badger me
and it doesn't do all that much
maybe a little red in the face
but i address it
i don't know what it is about you
but i can't stand it
to stand up to you
but now
treatment demands it
and you will do what you do
although i obsess over you
and love you
and the loss feels only as my own
i know you're losing too

Tomorrow, is already better.
Always know, where you live in the moment
With an eye still, foward-
There, is hope.
To not be stuck to the past but
Embrace change, welcoming progress;
Setting out onto new beginnings.

These are the frontiers, today.
Ideas, beautiful just ideals;
Respect for the planet you're on,
Fair honest treatment
Of every being


Of choosing love, and forgetting hate.
Opting for logic & sound reasoning

What do I speak of?
Of self-actualization and the pursuit of happiness
Of class movements, where you are not stuck where you are for life
I speak of what the fathers wrote,
I speak of our fathers' hopes.
Before those slavers from Europe,
Did what they always did well.
Before they slaughtered who should have been sisters & brothers
In this beautiful land, in our united country
You have been robbed of your destinies
They split us up into factions
From broken borders, to cliques
Secret courts, where throats are choked
Like behind closed doors
Information they keep from you
Or hold over your head
Like a rope around the neck
From freaks who feel nothing but empty
And only feel pleasure from deriving pain
Who are concerned with only their own back
Not even sacred is family
Blood is like water
All that matters is physical pleasure for the self

Remember our westward expansion,
God was not there with us.

It was savageness perpetrated
On a native populace

don't care now
if you worry
what was the point
kept things from you
cause i didn't want you to freak
but now i smoke joints
and think
your reaction
would be a fraction
compared to mine
would've got it through my mind
earlier, how little you care for people
or friends
whatever i was

this is not my world
or my people
freak on the outside
and when you get a glimpse
through the peephole
see what i hide
find out it's just as
ugly on the inside
3005
ain't no one
like you
in this life
no one has it figured out
deep seeded insecurities
full of doubt
when i look at you
i see you
when you look at me
you see what i see
and i hate me
so it's just as easy
to hate through
that lense
and your perspective