People always tell me that it gets better.
They tell me to be strong.
They tell me to keep fighting.
They say how I'll be happy again one day.
But I don't believe any of it anymore.
I'm tired of trying.
I'm tired of being strong.
I'm tired of fighting.
What they don't see is my everyday life.
They don't see how hard it is for me just to get out of bed.
They don't see me crying for no reason.
They don't see me contemplating cutting myself.
They don't understand how hard life is when you're depressed.
They relate it to just being sad,
But it's not.
I'm not just sad.
I hate who I am.
I hate that I let people down.
I hate that I can't get out of bed.
I hate that I have scars on my arms.
It won't get better.
I can't handle this anymore.
I can't keep fighting for "better".