Running down that Ecstasy Highway
as fast as my little legs can carry me
I'm blind as a bat with ear plugs
But we  were both
searching through this night time
skyway
reaching out to touch some one
and be touched.

All the guide books said this is the way,
turn right at Desire
turn left at Oblivion
and head on down
to the
neon lights, you can't miss it
as long as you are riding that
Ecstasy Highway.

I was told
some people find it at the end of a needle
others wait for the drop of the cards
and there are those who throw themselves
off that mountain side cliff looking for the winds to ride.
Some find it laying with you.

I've gone somewhere else I can't describe
made a wrong turn
thought it was a Transcendental highway
maybe
because I've been up and down,
made wrong turns right and left
made a wrong turn
at the corner of Sanctuary and Bliss.
I'd ask directions but there is not a soul around,
smacking my GPS
lost beyond words
with nothing familiar
in
neighborhoods looming
stark cracked out buildings
and
broken street lights
people with apocalyptic eyes
even the cops won't come down here any more
and the only help I've found
the only guide I have
is delusional and lost
though occasionally profound
dressed in piercings and tatoos
and she keeps yelling at me
something about going home to you.

Too tired to go on.

Had lost that bat back at the beginning of dawn
finally sat down at the coffee shop
at the corner
of
Love and Compassion
ordered up some hot self-acceptance
took a breath and looked around
still looking for the way back home.
I know it's just down the road
a stop light or so
maybe there's an on ramp
or a sign pointing out the way
to get back
on that
Ecstasy Highway.

I stopped at a gas station
talked to a guy
who told me lefts and rights
but my eye lids fluttered
fell asleep
right when he told me what I wanted to know
and when I opened my eyes
the station was closed
not a soul around
and I was running down
unfamiliar roads.

So if you hear a small lost voice
in the night
that's probably the sound of me
standing at the crossroads
of
Self-pity and Remorse
knocking at the Post Office
trying to mail these words
at a place that been long closed.
Please give me a hug or two
and send me on my way
if you give me any advice
I probably won't hear a word you say.
You see
I'm trying to make my way
back again
to that
Ecstasy Highway.

For my mother
Upon her arrival
Once the cold white warrior
softened
through wisdom and experience
In your love
I hear my own
Communicated softly.

Your presence through time
an anchor
an edge
a clarity of mind
a witness
in the kindness of others
who in your presence
became
melodic spirits
encased in kindness.

How did you ever hold so much power?

Shiny youth and age
remind one
of the ocean's waves come crashing
always the same
always different
a moment
one after the other
here and gone forever.

In that flavor I taste the sea air's
serenity
as I
as you gave to me
and
I held you there
a vast marvel of
endless wind blown currents
holding one mystery after another.

My dear Mother
upon your arrival
as you blessed me
I bless you
In your infinite grace.

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You think
you're
following
somebody.

When I see God I'm going to ask 'em*
How many chords of wood have I stacked
how many lovers never came back
how many faux pas
how many miscues
how many meanings didn't I do.

When I see God I'm going to ask 'em
What's the most disgusting thing I ever ate
and
who.

When I see God I'm going to ask 'em
Why the birds are always laughing
In 60 million years is that what we are going to do
and what do the redwoods
think about
is that what five thousand years of life
will do
and where did the joy go
ten minutes ago ?

If I see God I'm going to ask 'em
for the perfect poem
the perfect mirror
the perfect thought
the perfect silence
I'm going to ask 'em
to sing one more time
the cosmic hum.

If I see God I'm going to ask 'em
to kiss the ocean
embrace the desert
kiss the mountains
bless the rivers
love the people
I'll tell 'em to love them
as we're supposed to.

And if I see God I'm going to ask 'em
what's the meaning
what's the purpose
what's the solution
and
of course
What the ****?