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Tea stained tea cups are what fills my cabinets,
as well as my heart.

All of my best memories are with those stained cups
Sitting with the warm sun to my face,
fresh crisp summer air runs through my lungs.

Its another ******* day, and all I want is some hot tea.

It's sad to say that's the best part of my day.
I want something else to make my day,
Something a little bit more complex

I'm not fully dead inside, Because my tea fills me up.
The warmth lifts my mood off from the floor.
The taste is bittersweet; suchlike myself.

some days, I think my tea is the only thing
that can't upset me or let me
down.
everyone thought i was crazy
because i said all i need to feel alive
is your touch
but they didn't get your touch like i did
you didn't touch anyone else
like you touched me
and that's why no one would ever understand
your touch is my addiction
without it, i go crazy
i should be in an asylum
a mental institution
that's what they all say
but they can't treat me
they can't cure me
they won't be able to bring you back
and without your touch
i slowly go crazy
because i don't have my drug
i don't have what i'm addicted to
and there's no medication
for my addiction
because i'm not addicted to heroine
or *******
i'm addicted to you
and there is no cure
for such an addiction
because you're rare
and even though you're gone
you will always be
rare. //
ever since the first day i met you
all you've ever wanted
is just a cup of orange juice
nothing else
just that
and to me, that made you unique
different from everyone else
i won't forget the day i met you
the day i first heard your voice
the waiter asked your order and all you said was,
"Just a cup of orange juice, please."
i didn't get it -
i mean, why would anyone go to a restaurant
just for a cup of orange juice?
but you did it
as some sort of exploration
as some sort of research of cafes and restaurants
i thought that was pretty crazy when you first told me
but now i live to hear you ask me for orange juice
i love when you come home late at night
exhausted and you say,
"baby, get me a cup of orange juice please."
if you don't ask me for a cup of orange juice
i'll know for sure that something's wrong
because my baby, doesn't go a day without an orange juice. //
Dear A, you shine brighter than all the moons and stars together,
That light evened out with the darkness in me,
Dear B, I never noticed how sad you were,
Never noticed you were falling apart,
The absence of your voice would ruin the chorus,
Please don't leave me,
Dear C, You loved someone other than me,
and I never learned how to turn that into poetry,
Dear D, you showed me the best kinds of songs when you were sad,
When you were reminded of how much you missed her,
You found a girl with gentle hands and a want to love you now,
I miss you sometimes,
Dear E, I still hear you singing in every park I go to,
I still love you on 2:01 AMs,
Dear F, your ******* stories about loving me never fouled me,
I fell anyways,
Dear G, you talked of planting a garden with me,
But a past love held my seed,
In between bruises and cuts,
Dear H, you helped my skin remember the miracle of itself,
Dear I, I like to consider you my first love,
Your lips tasted like cigarette butts and addiction,
and your skin on mine remind me of depression and mid night demons,
Dear J, I loved you with all my soul,
and that love was the most precious thing,
I carry it always,
Dear K, I thought you were it,
But the the alphabet doesn't end at k,
Dear L, we talked about our dads inbetween thrusts,
I've never wanted to hate him so much,
Dear M, You were my 5 foot promise but your hands couldn't hold the secrets I lent,
Yet if I could I would nail these hands to the edges of compromise,
Dear N, my parents have never been in love,
But if it wasn't for them ******* in the back seat of a car I wouldn't have felt you pressed upon my skin,
Dear O, Sitting next to you at that lake in the middle of spring made me want to take a 7 hour drive up north just to see the leaves change colors,
and I fell like an autumn afternoon,
Dear P, your hands had touched more of the world than I could ever imagine while mine lined up with horizontal cuts,
Dear Q, I spent too much time imagining your fingers and how they move while you played that guitar,
I miss the way those same hands felt on my waist,
Dear R, we weren't a lesbian couple,
we were just two people who were very much in love with each other,
Dear S, I wrote a million poems trying to give it a name,
trying to get you closer to me,
but the lick stained corners of the pages were never embodied in you,
Dear T, I have all the butterflies I've ever felt for you in a box, somewhere deep in my closet,
Dear U, when I asked you if you loved me,
your lips curled up at the sides and I only saw me in between all the cracks
Dear V, Instead of you showing up, the rain did,
Dear W, Sometimes I remember how much I loved you and I want to cut up my body I'm no poet, not really,
Dear X, I spoke you into everything I did and loving you was the only thing I had ever felt good at,
Dear Y, my love stuttered more than it should've,
My love tripped over things,
My love said things that shouldn't have been said far too often,
Dear Z, I haven't met you yet
The sun shines down on me;
I love the warm rays that shine upon my face.
The sun is my best friend;
she's always there for me on my worst days;
and like a human; she needs her space too.
She'll take a day or two to herself to hide behind the clouds.
Even the sun needs a break to regain her energy for the days to come.
Waking up at 7:30 a.m. isn't a problem for me,
I know that she'll be up with me,
shining a bright orange color; Brighter than all the stars combined.
She's so flawless, kissing the sky every morning.
She knows she looks beautiful rising over the horizon,
Something so natural, and simple, something so superior to all other lights.
Something tells me she'll never leave me alone
like everyone else has.
Sleepless nights leave me feeling anxious, restless.
Is there a deeper meaning to my insomnia?
To lay here and think of my mistakes
gives me reason to believe I'm a disappointment
letting down my mother, my father, my family.
But when I switch my thoughts to the positive side;
it gives me reason to keep a smile on my face;
knowing I've only just begun my life.
Tell me i'm not crazy,
tell me my thoughts aren't considered psychotic.
Tell me this is normal; tell me to think this way is natural,
Back in forth in my own **** mind,
battling my negative thoughts with positive thoughts.
Guess it's just another sleepless night.
My throat is sore;
Telling me I've smoked too many today.
        My cough is strong;
Telling me I need to quit before it's too late.
        My mouth is dry;
Reminding me of a desert; in desperate need of water.
            My mind is screaming;
But, i never listen when it tells
                                                      Me
                                                        to
                                                                    quit.
The rain falls;
Simultaneouly with my tears.

It's like they're one,
I am one with mother nature

She is me, as I am her.
It's peaceful knowing when I stop;
So will she.
Dear ex-lover, ex-friend,
our mug still sits on my kitchen counter
my father still brings you up
my mother still asks about you
and every night when she serves me tea
it's in
our mug
when I'm having my 3 ams
our mug comforts me like you never could
when I need to remember how you almost loved me
I bring it down, dust it off and kiss its lips with mine
I wish I would stop doing that
I wish you would come back
you said that wherever we were going
we were going together
but the sun set and the moon took its place
and now I have left is your mug
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