your tethered past
lingers and surfaces on days it chooses to

and i am here
only wanting to be something
(anything)
possibly
you've never had before

Dear Universe,

Jeopardy always reminds me of my grandmother
-my father's mother.
Her living room, with the red **** carpet and pink curtains.
Or were they salmon?
They probably were.
I don't remember.
I was 9.
I was not ready to be concerned about those kind of details.
I was not ready for a lot of things.

i belong to every day, to everything
in no time, i belong to you

you know i'm a selfish *****
i want it all
i want it endless
tooth & gone
'til i'm breathless

I got tired of thinking
so I slid to the edge of the bed
and rallied my arms across the night stand
and gave in
over indulged in your plans
until I merely became a whim

I am the scorned
I am your devoted one
until my memory is gone

I am not promising you years, my girl
simply hours, in ours
to have you obsessed with it all
i should keep my mouth shut

silence my faith
i wanted you
all along
i needed you

You are my past, You are my absence
Swimming in anger's defeat
Now can you stop fighting and come over to me
already?

In the throes of a trophy
In the throes of a nobody
While on top of your beautiful body

Nothing so beautiful as nothing at all

darling,
while i was away
i became good at collecting.

i rallied how many times i thought about you and they became my finest
collections.

here, come tread through this mind
of tooth and bone and there you will find
endlessly
you.