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Lost Girl Mar 2020
This earth doesn’t seem to be for me
I wanna be in the clouds
With those I lost and miss so much

I can’t erase my mistakes
I don’t know how to forgive myself

My head is in the clouds
Ohh let me go

I promise I’ll be okay Mami
This pain won’t seem to leave
So it’s time that I do
It’s my time to go

I’ll watch over you
Just like you did
For 19 years

Now I’m in the clouds
And I’m finally smiling

I know you’ll shed some tears
But I’m finally happy
Here in the clouds
Here in the clouds
I’ve been struggling lately with my depression and panic attacks. I’m tired of the pain yet I still keep going. I don’t have intentions of killing myself, but putting pen to paper and chords to the piano really helps me.
Gray Dawson Mar 2020
Meaningless noise finds my ears
swimming words
Images flying
Eyes crying
I hold tight to my wrists
Clutch my head
My ears too
Let my voice whisper
"Stop, please."
As the thoughts and memories
Travel into my mind
They double down
Scream them away in my head
People watch
As my eyes go wide, and my head spins
Cover my eyes
As the tears fall one by one
Such dutiful soldiers
People advert they're eyes, in respect
and I fall apart
Gray Dawson Mar 2020
Scared of the silence that presses
Clinging to you like my too tight fitting jeans
Suffocation isn't a possibility
It's a reality
Left gasping and grasping for air that will never come back
Trying to speak the truth
But the language has abandoned me
I'm not writing
I am thinking
Trying to think away the silence
I am drowning
Gray Dawson Mar 2020
Hear me scream
The walls listen with curious ears
One by one, my thoughts flow into the stream
For years that stream has killed me with fears

Overcrowded, the thoughts clash together, like waves
Roars, deafen the ears, as the thoughts seem to find speakers
They foresee the days where the only thing to do is to dig the graves
They become such harsh beaters

Creeping into my eyes, burning memories make themselves known
Tearing me apart, muscle by muscle, sense by sense
Raise a shaky hand to my face, touch bone
Feel the stream verge on hurricane, every muscle tense

One single tear falls from the hollow bone where eyes once resided
A flurry of thoughts, burning memories, rush to the surface
Scream out in terror as my body, and mind divided
Feelings ripple, and washes away my only purpose

I am worthless
Carlo C Gomez Mar 2020
Get back in your cage, Dorothy
Let nature observe
Let sharks encircle
Let random impulses
Bring toe-curling raptures
Upon your dreamy imprisonment

Tin, this cage
In which you dwell
Straw, this sky
From which it fell
The only road out of your anxiety
Requires swallowing a pill
As big as the heart of a lion

You want so desperately to leave
Just click your heels
And repeat three times
"There's no place like home"
Then floor it
When the light turns yellow
Carlo C Gomez Feb 2020
Stay away from me

Stepping out of here I won't play host

Stay away from me

You look like another scary ghost

Stay away from me

First and foremost
Inspired by music from M83.
Jessica Feb 2020
panic

it’s the pounding that comes first
she can hear it
the blood running in her veins
her heart beating like a drum

soon the air will escape her
no matter how fast she runs
the air will always sprint faster
the breaths won’t come easy

her mind will soon join the race
thoughts flooding her brain
drowning out the calm
sending her sanity into last place

this race comes and goes
striking at any point
unpredictable and unstoppable
a battle to win

when the panic attacks come
the gun sounds
and the race begins
Carlo C Gomez Feb 2020
Fear is a headline
a casting shadow
a waiting room
a cancer
a culture
a color

It is suddenly knowing
or never knowing at all

Fear is the hanging silence
the falling voice

It is a darkroom
where negatives
are developed

Fear is something
about your eyes:
wink?
blink?
pink!

It is always having to say
you're sorry

Fear is what comes
after a sentence
and before a final meal

It is opening the mail
It is waving goodbye
Lili Gudewicz Feb 2020
Foot Tapping
Hand Shaking
Mind Racing
Walls Breaking
Strength Taking
Nail Biting
Head Throbbing
Knees Clattering
Teeth Chattering
Life Shattering
Lili Gudewicz Feb 2020
Hyperventilation
Depleting Frustration
Suffocation
A Painful Sensation
Desperation
Without Moderation
Devastation
Eternal Damnation
Deprivation
Emotional Mutilation
Derealization
Fear Escalation
Depersonalization
Self Extermination
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