Submit your work, meet writers and drop the ads. Become a member
Amanda Kay Burke Oct 2018
I am feeling lower than ever before
In my head I hold leaden weights
Think I need professional help
Emotions ignored become hard to navigate

Push down pain a little longer
Numb wounds for awhile
Gulp lumps of uneasiness
Conceal misery with a phony smile

Heart broken and bleeding
Hidden from all who look
I have mastered the art of composure
Face an unreadable book

Quiet night is tense and dim
Begging me to sneak off and play
Think I might cave in this one time
I'm scared I won't be able to get away

Under covers I hide in bed
Hoping I will not be found
By weakness and uncertainty
I lay motionless without sound

Trying to sort my issues
Organization isn't really my thing
Prefer to shove difficult subjects in a box
Lock out of sight so I can avoid the sting

Discovered something dull inside me
I found a tool sharper for out
Condemned the skin once considered home
It is easier to not think about

I'm told intensity only worsens with time
A smile hideously glued
Energetic as dying muscles will allow
Wild heart now meek and subdued

Memories will not depart
Echoes of voices loved then lost
Brighter still, rotating faces
Seasons changing sunlight to frost

My head has become a dark dungeon
Trapped there with my dirtiest sins
Watching mistakes as they rattle rusted bars
Capturing worst thoughts caged within
Sometimes my head is a quiet empty house painted white and others it is a crowded prison, dimly lit, dingy, filthy and loud.
Maxim Keyfman Oct 2018
I immediately got up from the thunderous
huge huge strong flow
from strong lightning she numbered in my
in my poor miserable tortured head
she sounded and destroyed everything

tomorrow I go to the mess again tomorrow I again
I go to eternity tomorrow I fall again tomorrow
I go to paper again tomorrow I go to light again
tomorrow i'm going to darkness again tomorrow i'm again
tomorrow I’m going back up as before

grow like a tree or not a tree or what
tomorrow or now or now it is tomorrow or
tomorrow was yesterday or tomorrow was in childhood
when was it tomorrow and tomorrow it is now
tomorrow as now there is no life

13.10.18
Anya Oct 2018
My parents...
are immigrants
Yet, why is it I,
so strongly
reject
their once,
homeland?
...
Perhaps,
the cause
it rooted at
my dad's cynical
comments
and critics
...
Perhaps,
it's my own visits
stifling relatives
horrible traffic
definitely
less, comfortable
...
Maybe,
it's the rejection
of such a gripping
religion
when I myself,
am an atheist
...
Maybe it's
the stereotypes
Chaining me
enclosing me
irritating me
...
...
...
Whatever the case,
it's there

I can be whoever I want to be
what-blood-crap?

Go far back enough,
and we're all related

The only links I have,
are my visits
and influence
of my parents
who once lived there
...
It's not a bad place...
at all...
...
That's not the problem
...
Is there one even?
...
...
...
I,
can be
who
I want
to
be
Xaela San Oct 2018
Like a foggy road

I can't see what's ahead

Only a sense of dread

In this quiet madness

Still keeps me walking

Without any sense of direction

Wondering if I can escape

This chaotic mind of mine.
E B K Oct 2018
you know
you're a writer
when the typing
inside your head
never ceases
Jillian Jesser Oct 2018
in the desert
a spider traps a mouse
a woman cries
I feel her hot tears
on my head
they drip drip drip
I look out over my balcony
wondering, why?
what is the point?
a man lives alone with his goldfish
he hasn't seen a woman naked in years
he reads a novel and laughs to himself
I hear his laughter
It crowds my mind
I feel its hands and elbows poke my sides
I walk into work
I walk out
somewhere downtown,
a teenager is trying marijuana for the first time
I feel the warmth
the guilt
I feel endless
Jillian Jesser Oct 2018
the world carries on outside my apartment
fighting
drinking
laughing
sleeping
a girl finds a flower
a man drives to work
a woman eats some green beans
a soldier wonders why he signed up
for this
a fat law maker *******
and me
I sit
and think
sometimes, cry
don't know what else to do
summer breathes hot air down my neck
and somewhere a baby is born
it is cold there
and her father is dead
Karmen Oct 2018
writing comes like lightning
I'm fighting this writing
tired of wanting to explain things out
I feel more like im drowning
cause knowing you aren't all right
got me staying up every night .
its night out, all alone out
tryna block these thoughts out
pause the flashback of the last call we had
the feelings that flowed out
your heart out to reveal
hit me like lightening
some sort of frightening beauty
it has me sinking
not knowing how I should be thinking
ive wanted this for a long while now ,
and not ever receiving was little pleasing
so excuse me for shrieking
this apology wasn't anything I thought id be getting
you've made me drown  more than known
sinking further in a world of fucken dumb love
you are what I hate when I love , love when I hate
does that even make sense
you make me be better then okay
not many are lucky to say
I know you don't believe me
but it is your world, im lucky to be living in it
your world and lucky I had a chance to be in it.
year gone now I don't know what to say
im not better off , im a disaster since we fell off
life just feels wrong and its taking me on
im trying to stay strong
wish you would only call
then I could keep on
not move on cause I hold onto your flame strong
I know its dumb
but ima be here even if it takes forver long
cause I meant it when I said
ill always be here
even not near
you got me on my feet
can even be a buttdial without a speak
youll have me at my peak
quick away  from weak
just think
you could assist me from this lightning steak
cause im almost knocked out off my feet
waiting to take leave
if we never get to speak
so please
message me when you read
and tell me I better chill before you leave
or you know what I mean at least
lates
too much feel to put words for all that's gone on
misha Sep 2018
you want
to keep
us a hush
because
you don't
want anyone
to know that
you're with me

you make it
pretty clear
when you
cunningly
follow me
like a shadow
so much alive
but not noticed

you're careful
when you're
with me
in case i might
blow up
but i don't
let my feelings
out because
i know
i will
lose you
if i did

i'm frightened
without you
because in
some wicked
way you make
me feel loved,
in some sick
way i feel happy,
in a sinners way
you make me
feel alive

the truth is
that i'm an
object to
you,
i'm just someone
who you can come
to and look for my
attention

and i'm
always dumb
enough to
give it
to you
i'm so dumb
to want you
i'm so dumb
to accept you
i'm so dumb
that i can't
let you go

you say
we're just
lovers
passing our
time,
i wish i
could call
you mine

you won't
make the
first move
then
i'd have
to prove
what you
really mean
to me

still, i know
you'll leave
me alone
and how
can i be
a lover
without
your love?
misha Sep 2018
stop
kissing
me in
the corner
of our school
where
no one
can see
us

but maybe
start
being
a friend to
me so
that everyone
knows
that i'm
more than
your toy

stop calling
me when
you're drunk
with your friends
and call me names
"what a ****."

you'd laugh like
you told a joke
but really
you know
you're lying

don't push
me in
the hallways
and act
like it
means
nothing,
like i
mean
nothing

i know
you only
say those
words
and do
those things
to get me
out of your
head

but i hope
you realize
that you're
not the
only
one
who's
afraid
Next page