If I were a person stronger than myself
My insecurities would disappear
Would you hear worried absurd thoughts
If murmured into your ear?

You would be horrified to learn
The madness running my brain
If I was less crazy my head would be too
It's a shame that instead I am insane.

Here you have gone and hit your head.
The heart beating like a clock makes the rivers run red.
Eating makes you grow fonder.
Drinking makes sink much further.
I can only imagine what garden awaits your grand design.
Seeing it out to the end makes it very fine.
Here you are again.
You are seeking out your friends.
Who awaits you at this party?
Your grandma, uncle, and your cousin Marty.
As you can see;
“No party of your own” they plea.
Maybe meet someone down at the beach.
“Ignorance is bliss” is the only bliss they teach.
Now here you are in king’s court.
“I am the queen” they snort.
Here you are again now with your blood roses.
What you did right as rain; they know you did, and you know this.
So let us take a walk through the forest.
This is the only place no one is trusted.
What you want to see catches your eye.
Nothing about the chain smoker and the other guy.
Because now you are seeing yourself look back.
The kind of quality some people lack.
Now as the beast draws near.
You wake up; it was playing on your fear.

I finally ******* get it
I need to know when to stop
I need to know when to focus
Enough of the smoke and mirrors
And all the hocus pocus
I’ve got to be preoccupied
To keep everything off my mind
What am I doing with my time?
Am I only a distraction
Instead of being the action
People wanna move
Standing still will make em snooze
Instead of being tight
I’ve never tried with all my might
Nobodies going to tell me what to do
If I expect it I’ll be *******
I cant let my **** be loose
Waking up is only the beginning
The rest of the day still needs some filling
My level needs to be higher
So I can gain and be desired
My brain had gone haywire
But I’ve finally fixed the wires
Finally some of my demons can retire
There are more moments when my head is clear now
Maybe I can finally get the standing ovation while I bow
I want to inspire
Be more than just admired
I want to truly be love
Tired of the when push comes to shove
I don’t want to fight anymore
There’s somebodies children I want to bore
What kind of mother would I be if I was just another chore

I am a hijab,
A piece of soft cloth,
firmly and gracefully pinned around her head,
Covering her hair,ears and neck,
not her face.
I am a fabric in different colours,
most commonly  in black or white.
I am her safe guard,
Against the harsh sun and wind,
Unwanted men's glares,
Their sneers and harsh words,
Her beauty, pride and soul within.
For her,I command respect,
Make unknown men keep their distance.
I give her a symbol of purity and piety,
Together with serenity in her eyes.
Because of me she is not oppressed,
She is as free as a bird,
To soar over mountains,cross oceans,play sports of her choice and achieve the best education.
She enjoys life but by having me around her she pleases Allah too.

it was raining
but only in my head
everything was gray
everything was like an autumn

summer is gone
today was his last day
met an old friend
nothing changes and goes

played piano
quietly and almost silently
I looked at the sea
it merged with the sky

31.08.18

Have you ever wondered why the world is so rough?
These plains break and mold from those like you.
Trampling in no order-
only you, decide what remains,
while the rest of that mind,
listens to the lies of the world.
How high your head must be,
what little oxygen you must get,
for your ignorance is as fluffy as a cloud.
You see what you wish in the sinful…
oh, how the crime is you.

Sincerely yours,
The Suppressed Dirt