It is
Simply
Another
Day.

A day
Made for
Businessmen
And toy-makers.

It has no
Significance
In our world
Unless.

You are one
Of those who
Have loved
And lost.

And I pity
Anyone else who
Tries to
Symbolize it.

For I am
Not one of
Those people
So I am willing.










To let it be.

dear dad,
i wish you  were here to read this,
though if you were then i wouldn't be writing this in the first place,
you went away when i didn't even know what death meant,
what being orphaned meant,
its pretty sad at times,
people celebrate there fathers on this particular day,
they give out gifts and thank their dads for being their father,
a rather cute and cheerful business it is,
i wish i knew the meaning of this day when you were here,
maybe i would have hugged you a little tighter,
so that you couldn't have gone away from me,
i wish i could've stopped you,
i wish...
i wish........
but that's not so.....
you're not here,
you'll never be,
so much of the possibilities,
so much of could've beens,
happy father's day father,
you were a great dad :)

And as I lied on that couch in my cousin's house I couldn't help but begin to weep. I wept for my father, who, for the past few years has been in and out of jail. I wept for him and I wept with him. The only man I've ever truly loved was locked in a place void of it. And I can't sleep because it's all I think; how the kindest man, with the biggest heart, is now the smallest man with the biggest guard. Happy father's day.

Thank you Dad for everything you have done,
your hard work and sacrifice for everyone.
Thanks for everything you continue to do,
but most of all thank you just for being you.
Thank you Dad for taking time to care,
we really appreciate you always being there
at those times when we feel we really need you;
you never leave us wanting, always come through.

Thank you Dad for being constantly strong,
for being such a rock when things go wrong,
for making time for us, for always listening,
to the myriad of problems we constantly bring.
Thank you Dad for calming our fears,
for soothing words, for wiping our tears.
Thank you for never letting us give up hope;
for convincing us repeatedly we can cope.

Thank you for your guidance as we move along,
for teaching each one of us right from wrong,
for encouraging us always to do the right thing,
for the moral compass that guides our everyday living.
Thanks for your calmness, your infinite patience,
your common sense when faced with youthful exuberance!
Thank you for providing us with everything we need
for believing in us, giving us the tools to succeed.

Thank you Dad for never giving up on me,
for encouraging me to be all that I could be,
for your forgiveness those times I was absolute brat,
for your direction when I had no clue what I was at.
Thank you from my heart for being such a great Dad,
Thank you for the wonderful upbringing I had,
Thank you mostly for teaching me what it means to be a Dad,
If I am only half as good as you then my kids won’t do so bad.

Hey daddy,
can you hear me?
I miss you.
It has been a hard
Two years
without you.
I really miss you.
It is Fathers' Day tomorrow.
I remember the last
Fathers' Day
that you were alive--
I didn't greet you.
We had a fight
and I was the stubborn
selfish child.
I thought I was right.
But now, two years too late
I realize I was not.
I am sorry.
I miss you.
I miss your hearty laugh,
your warm hugs,
I miss you waking me up
by tickling my foot--
I remember being annoyed
when you wake me up that way.
What would I not give
to have you wake me up
again?
I miss you calling me
to eat breakfast
before going to school.
I miss you doing the laundry
even if I am a big girl
already.
I miss you.
I miss the days when you
would drive me to school
and fetch me at 5pm.
Back then I wished you wouldn't
so I could spend more time
with my then-boyfriend.
What would I not give, daddy,
to have you pick me up
from school
once again?
I miss your silly ways
of making noise
during New Year's Eve.
For the past two years daddy,
my New Years were quiet
silent
dead.
Like you.
The last New Year's eve
you were alive,
the New Year's eve
the year before you died
you were drunk
and I welcomed 2013
feeling so lonely
with mom in UAE
and you, on the couch
too passed out to wake up
amidst all the noise.
Somehow, I knew
the next New Years won't be the same
I didn't expect
that it would because
they would be spent without you.
I miss you telling me you love me
and all those kisses
that used to really annoy me.
I miss you.

I am sorry.
For being a failure.
For being a bad daughter.
Sorry if I chose that guy
that *******
over you.
Sorry that I didn't listen.
I thought I was right.
I had so much pride.
What would I not give, daddy,
to have you here right now?
I promise, this time I would choose
you.
I would choose
to listen.
I would choose
to love you.
I would choose
to swallow my pride.
I would choose...

I wish I could turn back time
love you a little better.
I'd go back further than the day you died.
I'd go back to the time
when our family was whole
I would do whatever it takes
to keep it that way.
So that you won't have to be a drunkard
because you have broken your heart.
I'd go back, daddy.
I would go back and fix you if I could.

I am turning 20 in three months now.
Remember your promise to me?
It is two years overdue daddy.
I turned 18 without you.
You promised...
You promised we would dance
with or without a party
you said you wouldn't miss the chance
to dance with me.
I was waiting daddy.
But you never visited me
not even in my dreams.
It has been two years daddy.
I wouldn't mind having a dance at 20.
What would I not give daddy?
What would I not give
to dance with you
one last time...
Like we did when I was 7.
Ironic because
you said not to choose
Dance With My Father
as a song to dance to
with you
because you are not dead yet.
But now you are.
And I miss you so much.

I love you daddy
I am sorry.

There are times when the pain is too much.
There are times when we would do anything for a way out.
When we would drown ourselves
in the middle of a drought just so we
wouldn't have to be thirsty again.
We sometimes have to remind ourselves
that we are not alone.
Not yet.

There are times when I bet my soul on three lies told.
And even though I won,
I was payed back in fool's gold.
We grow up never thinking that 'up' means old.
We are not alone
and our paths have been walked before.
What is left in store for us
as we ride this tour bus to hell
is the burnt-out car frames of those
who didn't do quite as well

Father Time continues to soldier ever forth
and sometimes what we want is south
and what we need is north.
But I'm telling you that if you think
that you are the first, you are not.
You came from the smallest dot and now
you are a monument to those who came before.
You are a masterpiece created beyond compare,
built in the image of those who's blood you share.
Those who care in a way no one else ever will.

So next time you are in pain, remember,
you are not a waste.
You are an imprint left by two people
that will one day longer be here.
As the seasons change, realize,
there will soon be a year when
our fathers will die.
When we will be made to walk on our own
without knowing why.

So when the ground starts to eat at you,
pulling you down with a force so strong
that you don't even try to fight it,
let your monuments stand and know that they are not alone.
Because we all must return to the earth,
in one form or another.
So honor them while you still have them,
be they your Father
or your Mother.

You've helped me grow up
You stood quietly in the background of my life
Silently fixing all my problems before I even knew they were there
I have always been
and will always be
a daddy's girl

Happy Father's Day
To the best father I could ask for,
My mother who played both roles
Since I was only six months old.
Who bravely stepped up to a man
Who had been making our lives hell
And for knowing when I needed
A mother more than a father.
Thank you for saving
All five of us from a life with a man
Who loved alcohol more than his kids
Who loved smokin cigs
More than a nice barbecue.
Who never bothered to be a part of our lives
When the going was rough because of him.

Thank you Mom, for always putting us first.
Your the best father I could have asked for.

"Happy Father's Day."
They all say.

Celebrate your fathers, and step-fathers.
But what if you don't have one?
What do we do then? There is no one.

Then what if you have a wretched one?
People tell you that they are your only father.
They tell you that if you don't show them compassion,
You're going to burn to ash.

Not everyone has their "first hero"
Because some people are without a hero.