but who was i without you?

it wasn't realistic. hell, it wasn't real. you weren't real. who i thought you were was just pretend but ******* it, i hate that you don't even care i'm in pain.

i loved you. you were my comfort when i was lonely and the thought of being held by you made me feel safe.

it's not fair!

why her?

I have so much to say
But nothing to write down
It's raining cats and dogs
My phone will only stay on for ten more minutes
No electricity until the rain stops
It's thirty-eight minutes to two a.m.
I've got tears in my eyes
I'm a mess.

I wrote an epistle for a friend today
For his one-year anniversary
With the love of his life
She completes him
I see it
All the changes she made
In his life
She wrote an epistle for his birthday last month
He's no good with words
So he kept begging until I said yes.

I recently had my heart broken
I broke it myself
But I guess I can't complain
Cause I shattered his along with mine
Not my friend
My ex-boyfriend
We were together nine months
Would be ten today
But I broke us.

I'm so sad
I toss and turn till I cry silently
And then I drift into a restless sleep
It was best for us what I did
But it don't feel like it
It's like he was a part of my respiratory system
And without him it's so hard to breathe.

On nights this cold and lonely
I wonder if he's sober
Cause I'm the crybaby and he's the drunk
We're both trying to cope seeing as the pain is too much
We still talk but not like before
It could never be like before
It's such a shame
It really is cause
We were perfect together
But life is a complicated ***** that ******* us over.

It's now twenty-eight minutes to two a.m.
Time to cry my eyes out
So I can finally get a three-hour sleep.

I'm wide open,
Standing stark at your front door,
Like a covered peep hole,
I'm not welcome anymore.

I'm wide open,
Your shadow frame cracks the floor,
But it's drifting away from me,
Scaling back the dinosaur.

Now I'm closed,
Alone in a clothing line,
Thrift stores we used to find,
Our vintage passing for time.

Do you suppose,
Roses are thorny vines,
Grapes don't smell like wine,
You were never the nurturing kind.

Humor me, love me, let me
be selfish. Don't
make me sleep alone. I can't
bear this want
because I am the fool
who fell in love with you
after you told me not to.

Same old song
so dance with me
until the record stops
and we're the only ones left
spinning. Get dizzy
with me, and we'll fall--
both of us, this time.

Large doses of you
Were never good for me,
But, I've always loved to
Push my limits.

Our first date involved you shoving your tongue down my throat and i don’t know if it’s because you couldn’t get enough of me or you couldn't get rid of the taste of her.