Faded daydream
like continuous clockwork constantly
reaffirming itself in cycles of limitations.
Who is talking
which one is speaking?
The actor of many characters that
have become so real.


The awareness cuts through
and
shows it's not you.
But the patterns still remain,
a flickering between
an old life and the new.

Someday, when I’m older, my daydreams won’t be daydreams anymore.
The morning sun will dance across my bare skin in my third floor apartment.
Photos in film line my bedside table and life’s so sweet I hardly reach for my phone.
We dance on wooden floors to Van Morrison’s ‘tupelo honey’ and the sugar in my coffee falls short in comparison to the love we make.

Well, time to get up…
Back to dreary reality,
I wonder what would happen if I just stayed in bed all day.
Would anyone really notice?
Would anyone even care?

Got up. Not paying attention to anything really.
I just want to go back to bed.
When i’m dreaming, i don't have to do the same thing over and over.
I’m just going through the motions in real life.

Almost time for bed, but i'm too overwhelmed to even go upstairs.
That’s it. I give up.
I’m Tired.

That stare so seen and felt, unfocused eyes upon a green belt or perhaps a dancing flame, first light of day, a cloud up high or a creature unto aim.
It speaks to the very soul, this line is known, no emotion of note from birth it’s owned as entangled carnation, its internal role, to hold fast in dorm, pure as bone.
Yet strongly serve and let it be heard, the notion of essence, traversed when alert, you are back, a spec, society bound, freely reminded, you are the world, lost and found.

Never learned how to live without this cloud in my head
Got a script for the doctor, tells me how to live
Never wrong, never right, why is everything a fight
All work, no play its the same every day, every day, every day, like its Groundhog Day
Need a break from the monotony its gotten me
Twisted in the head like a knot
About to trip and drop
Spiraling
Never asked for help, now that's a fallacy
Honestly, on my hands and knees for someone listening
But when I look into the sky I start to daydream
Head in the clouds, I make distance from the screams, hiding behind my dreams while I leave them only as dreams its easy to see Why
When we die there might as well be nothing
We can't treat eachother right here
When right here
And now
Is all that really matters

the church bell tolls
one, two, three times for my soul
God will never take away
my reason to pray

sighing between sips of cyanide
by the sea side
my pace a little slower
my eyes a little lower
it's all quite hazy
living in a day dream