While some people are coming back
Some are leaving
Seen a hundred faces
But I’m looking for your traces

Like the cycle of life
Some of us are coming into this world
While others are leaving

How your day goes depends on who you know
The one who’s about to come or the one who’s about to go
Are you the one happy cause someone you know is coming back
Or are you the one filled with grief because someone is leaving

Excitement rushing through my blood
As each stop passes by, I sit here happily
And I know I'm one stop closer to you
You're my friend, you're my family

When you go home
I feel like I'm not home
As the train goes from underground to the light
Everything around me seems so bright

I'm alone right now
In a city that is white and cold
Although when I take the same road back
Things won't be the same
All these people looking at me like I’m a maniac

For I will be with you my friend
And you'll tell me your stories
And I'll tell you mine, no worries
Even though it’s a weekday, it feels like the weekend

As I get closer
Your face in my head gets clearer
Reminding me of the last time I saw you
For that was at the airport too

love -
an emotion filled with desire
well i desire you.

its you i want
breathing your deepest drowned secrets in my ear
telling me you never loved anybody this much
stroking my hair in the hot, hot sun

love -
an emotion filled with trust
well i trust you.

its you i want
knowing when I'm not ok
kissing me to wipe my tears away
thinking of me when you're not here with me

love -
an emotion filled with affection.
well, i wanna affect you

its you i want
thinking of me when you're with her
missing me when you're all alone
dreaming of me because you aren't here.

where are you?

i love you.

Over and over like an endless love story we are pulled back together.
No matter where we go,
No matter all we've done,
You are the fibres of my existence-- and I will always come back to you.

you said to be more like you so i became a ghost too but i have taken your place as the one breaking dishes, shattered glasses refracting the cold light of morning-afters and you are silence and silence and silence and no matter how much noise i make or how many times i scream out your name into the dark you’re nowhere to be found; you’ll never come back around. you’re dead and you left me here alone on my own. i can never forgive you for this.

I know that you may not love me
And i hope that now you feel free
I know i'm not something you miss
But I still long for one more kiss
And i cant see cause everything is a blur
Cause I know that you love her
If missing you is a crime
then lock me away i'll do my time
If you could hold me one more time
I would promise to never make another rhyme
I know that you may not love me

​So you are coming back now,
In small currents.
Lapping against my shores ever so gently,
Sneekily peeking inside for hidden memories.

Now that you have come back,
In tides and waves.
Hitting against me with a power so familiar.
Trying to knock the walls that hide me,
From the memories I dare not revisit.

Now that you have gone,
A storm's wreck behind
You knocked down every wall I built.
Leaving me in circles,
In this hurricane of broken emotions.

I am still caught up in your winds.

God,
(I'm not praying, I'm mourning)
It is exactly 1:04 in the morning
and 37 seconds
and I can't even ******* sleep
and there is no one that I can talk to who understands me
because the people that do,
stopped caring when I started trying. . .
I'm writing this here on this piece of paper or computer screen
(whichever you choose)
because I ******* miss you.
And I know that you would yell at me if you heard that word
come out of my mouth
but I would rather you yell
than not say nothing at all. . .
****, ****, ******
You're still not yelling so that means you must
really be gone. . .
It's 1:09 now, dad
and 17 seconds
and I have school tomorrow
but I can't sleep because you always ******* haunt my thoughts
and I used to think that I wanted to **** myself
because I thought I could be with you when I die
cause you said we could meet again in heaven,
you remember that, right?
Sure you do, that was one of your
last ****** days on this earth
But now that I don't believe in heaven
or hell
or maybe even God,
what have I got to die for?
In fact, what the hell do I even have to live for?
You're so ******* gone and
it ******* hurts
and maybe it makes me a ****** poet to write
so many curse words in a poem.
You would scold me if you read this.
But you can't read this,
and you're not scolding me
and you're not even ******* here anymore.
You're just gone,
and *God,
I need you to hug me and tell me it's all okay
and call me your little girl one last time
and let me see you ******* wasted
off your knockers one last time
and let me come home to find you broke into our house again
and let me listen to you yell at my mother
once more. . .
God, maybe this makes me a bad person
but I would take anything just to have you back.
I ******* miss you. . .
and no matter how hard I try
I can not put down in words the immense
seering pain that I have felt.
It's 1:17 a.m
and who ******* cares about the seconds.

At certain junctures of a journey you feel you connect to certain people, places and situations at a different level, hardly comprehendible, quite different from the hundreds of people you've ever met and many places you've ever been, they leave you with a spirit, their inherited tastes and an obsession that you will go back to it all someday.

I didn't mean to lose you. But the only thing I'm good at is pushing people who love me away.