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Giovanna Oct 2020
Was happy to see me floating,
little did I know I floated cause I was dead.
Mariana Oct 2020
Friends and family often ask me what suffering from bipolar is like
I always give the same cookie-cutter response.
It is comprised of really high highs
It also has really low lows and
If you are fortunate enough you have periods of baseline.
I  have never been able to explain that complexity in my head.
I was never been able to explain the pain and suffering that has been happening for over 8 years.

I was never able to explain that the lows are sometimes last months or years of hate and self-loathing.
I was never able to explain the thought never stops you can not eat, sleep, or breathe without feeling pain.
I was never able to explain that you feel like your drowning and
       you are using all your energy to stay afloat that it is easier to just give up some time and sink.
I was never able to explain that everything is spinning out of control that you cling on to anything you can.
I was never able to explain that the hurtful thing I caused to myself
       was out of survival to show to myself I could still control
               something, anything in a place that feels like you will never feel stable again.

I was never able to explain how the highs are not highs they are a
  monster dressed as an angle that seduces you to believe that things are better.
I was never able to explain how that demon pushes you past all your limits until you find yourself alone and drained.
I was never able to explain the addiction to the feeling of happiness that comes on occasions with the highs
I was never able to explain that after living in darkness for so long the high is all you can ask for even if you know it will hurt you.

If I had to explain to people now what it is like to suffer from bipolar disorder is like, I would say it is exhausting.
The thoughts never end.
They never stop no matter how depressed or manic you are.
You lie awake all night because you can not silence them.
You wake up before sunrise because your awoken by the racing of the thoughts.
Your brain never stops.
You are left on the floor immobilized unable to do anything but listen to your head feeding you lies.
You are left with a body that can no longer function.
You are left exhausted and that feeling never goes away.
If I had to describe bipolar disorder in one word it would be
Exhaustion
He says, "When she's manic like this, I can't keep up with her!"
He is lost,
Lost in the endless sea of my energy,
In the tsunamis of syllables
And the way the sun touches my skin, flowing through me.
I am a force to be reckoned with,
Daughter of the sky,
Made from dust of the stars.
They beckon to me with their brilliance
And the gleam of secrets they will not share.
I want to know where the edges of their shine go,
Want them to swallow me into their vastness.
I am a thunderstorm,
The gale force winds that shake the very earth he walks on.
My synapses connect at light speeds,
Weaving the strands of the universe.
I am a power,
Muse of the way the leaves quake and change color,
Poet to Mother Nature.
Of course he cannot keep up.
It is hard to run in flip flops!
Sofia Oct 2020
The set of the sun, and end of the day.
The fall into night, and into its fright.
When I hold you, everything is alright.
We’ll hug through the sun, through night and through day.
And, at the end of the day, I’d have it no other way
Poem about a friend's stories with self-harm that I wrote yesterday. Edit: early line break on this, too. "Day" isn't supposed to break.
Vellichor Oct 2020
I guess I hoped that you
Would get some sleep last night
That come the break of dawn
Things would be alright

But here we are again
And you haven’t slept a wink
Relapse is a ghastly cavern
And you’re standing on the brink

You’re smiling like a maniac
And you rattle on and on
But I was up late worrying
Forgive me if I yawn

Your eyes are open wide
Like you’ve had too much caffeine
I know where this is going
But you’ve made it three years clean

If you could just get sleep
Maybe you’d wake up okay
And these monsters that you battle
Would simply go away

I lie to myself now
Just so I can make it through
I know that you’re in pain
But don’t you know, I’m hurting too?

I know it’s not my battle
And I can’t make you see the light
But I’m so tired of the darkness
And I’m so weary from the fight

And I guess I hoped by now
That this would’ve come to pass
But since it didn’t, won’t you try
To get some sleep at last
LS Martin Oct 2020
Words go past me but I don't hear them
People wave at me but I don't see them
Thoughts run through me like a dream
with darkness following...

.... Then suddenly the world is filled with
vibrant hues of technicolor
My eyes once damp with tears dilate with the cosmic energy of the stars
All my troubles far in the distance
nothing can touch me
I feel power inside me
Why bend the knee to the arms of an angry God?
When you can pay worship to the temple of my body?
Though I am drenched with blood and sin
my heart is fragile with expectation
mark soltero Oct 2020
nobody talks about the disappointment
from letting you down
not living up to the excitement

once the mania wears off
and my frequencies begin to lower
i sink back into normalcy

my shine becomes lackluster
like fools gold
my touch only turns your skin green

eventually everyone grows tired of me
mark soltero Oct 2020
what can you do when the tides begin to strengthen
and your arms begin to weaken
your lungs begin to tighten
the light within me used to shine bright
these days the flame dwindles low
i can’t get far away
you can’t escape yourself
it seems like i won’t ever get help
like the predestined choice of failure
how can i succeed
living around so much indignation
everything I lack
is my humiliation
I won't say goodbye to you
Because I can't

You are part of my chemical make up

We are eternally bonded

I won't say goodbye to you

Instead I will make room for you

I am not ashamed of you

I won't let the stigma win

Bipolar, come and take a seat

We might as well be friends
I make friends with my crazy..
Psyrïenne Sep 2020
Ï
On the issue
Of mental stability,
I do not
Have mental
Stability
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