I am being suffocated by pain
That demands to be felt
But refuses to acknowledge its origin or cause.
How do I tame a beast
Whose name I do not know?
This season always brings with it emotional turmoil,
The joys of daylight's manipulation of bipolar disorder,
But this creature that weighs down my chest
Has not uttered its name.
Like all demons,
It must be named to be exorcised,
And it will not be cowed by my speaking in tongues.
Back ye foul beast
From whence you came.
By hook or crook
I will learn your name.

I am glass

I’m sturdy
shiny
beautiful
till I crack
Then I shatter

don’t be fooled though
For even when I’m shattered
I’m still strong enough to hurt you
For when I shatter is when you bleed

So don’t push me

Or I might just crack

Debilitating
When the mind cripples the body
Infuriating
When your youth fades day by day
Hurting
When trust is broken because no one believes you
Yearning
To just get out of bed, while they think you're lazy
Praying
Your pain could go away
Begging
To live a normal life

Its very real
When the mind is so sick, it affects your physical being

7 pm like clockwork
A row of tiny, flat pearl soldiers
Gulped whole
So the dissolving of chalk suffocates the belly
Not tongue

A dozen little tablets
Now down to fraternal twins
Dark circles the colour of a bruise
Now fade away to sand
Washed away by time and sea

Angry red streaks hiss over my skin
On my thighs, my sides, my *******
Now yawn gossamer tiger marks
Proof of my excess
My will to heal

Curling fingers over my proof
Eyes black as charcoal
Glint like the night
When the looking glass
Proudly catches a hint of a smile.

sometimes, all you can do is feel small.
breath held, for the slightest exhale could be of the wrong tone—
just silence.
silence.
silence speaks louder than words, so, silence.
but even that— sometimes too sweet on the tongue, too many tablespoons of sugar.
silence too sweet like sugar cane stinging the back of your throat.
silence.
just silence.