I remember a long time ago i was a little girl
You and mommy i looked up to yall was my world
The things you did back then i didn't understand
But im older i get it now im here to be a helping hand
You promised me you would give it up and you did
I loved you for that i looked up to you as a kid
Daddy why go so many steps back when you came so far
you overcome so much you almost conquered it all
Daddy why would you let drugs get ya joy
this is not no game they are not a toy
Daddy why give it all up so far in the game
I look in your eyes nothing is the same
your too strong to let this get u down
Since i found out i just pray so you will come around
you got through it once i know you can do it again
I know how you feel but daddy this not the end
I'm sorry for not being the son u wanted to have
But i know some parts of our lives together i made you glad
I want to blame myself but i just cant
You taught me weakness never win over a man
Daddy Why are you doing this to yourself
You never hurt you if necessary you hurt some one else
Daddy why you still have Adrianna to raise
Please just take it day by day
Daddy why would you let those that mocked you be right
Promise me this battle of life you will fight
I am here for you no matter what
I wont let you see my pain i will be tough
You make me wanna fight and at times cry
I love you no matter what but i just want to know
                   DADDY WHY?

You probably wont ever get this poem
Because i cant even get to you over the phone
i want you to know your puerto- rican princess has grew
I'm no longer seven and innocent too
I'm sixteen years old and have grown out my hair
Momma do you hear me i wish you was here
I know i wasn't no angel and i was spoiled is hell
I know i got on your nerves i can tell
momma i miss you and want to see your face
memories of you  i just cant erase
I dream about you all the time
Momma you need to know your always on my mind
I have a girlfriend that i really love
you see momma i told you i grew up
In so many ways she reminds me of you
its the little things she say and do
I think you would like her and really approve
Because if i was you i would approve too
Momma do you hear me i love you so much
I want you to hold me i want to feel your touch
One of these days we will rejoin
Face to face or over the phone

                                                   I love you momma

As i think about all the times i spent with you
and how you loved me so much like a mother would do
I reminisce on moments we shared
Like when dady was around he really did care
How i was your doctor because you was always sick
These are just some things that i miss
I miss you yelling because you never beat us
And if daddy hit me you would yell and curse
How u taught me things i never knew
Like the importance of staying in school
and with a girl don't be stupid
You would say the right woman would come guided by cupid
I remember any and everything you did for me
Especially when you would hold me while i would sleep
And how you use to sing to me when i was restless
even to when you cleaned all of my messes
your smile would explore all through the room
and when school let out i would come home soon
i want you to know i respect what u had to do
and don't forget i love you

Why live a life that is not worth living
I carry a cross that is not worth bearing
the knives in me go in so deep
voices screaming in my ears while i sleep

I cant take it no more all of this chaos and pain
feeling like life is nothing im going insane
i pray that god take this pain from me
where is the light only darkness i see

leave me alone i have nothing for you
why all of the abuse what did i do
my heart cant take none of this
i sometimes wish you presence i could dismiss

this is my feeling of chaos and pain
these are the feelings that drive me insane
these are the feelings i need to leave
Here lies the things that makes my heart bleed

You know o must be cursed or some ****
Because my whole life has been full of it
Haters,opinion makers,liars and manipulators
Is as if the devil picked me as his favorite
If its not my hair its my cloths
if its not my attitude its the pain i wont show
If it s not how i talk i be ****** it the way  i walk
If its not my friends its the ones i want
Its as if you don't want me with a little misery but a bunch
Everyone says they want whats best for me
Then how come those words i dont see
Your family is supposed to have your back
its A shame how mines don't go with that
It used to be if u like it i love it
in my family if i like it they **** it
Haters that is all you are
You thought my future my past would scar
But u see i made best of the worst
So you mad and want to bring out my hurt
You know i laugh at you mother ******* yall is funny
My dark clouds is so **** sunny
And you suckers wanna give me rain
You must be crazy better yet insane
If you think the happiness i created yall will destroy
now you want me to bring the noise
I think i have come out real nice,tight ,and fly
And yall are hating.......... Why?

Erased is everything as we go into the jungle
No cloths are needed our body's together can cuddle
You hear the birds as they sing a love song to set the mood
My inner lion roars as i begin to touch you
You at first want it slow ,OK with me
So as i go inside you i become the jaguar ready to feast
Going slow inside you that is what you want
The bear came out of me and your juices i begin to hunt
Erased is everything as we go into the jungle
No cloths are needed we can just cuddle
I turn you over nice and slow i thought u would like
How the bull came out me and our body's begin to fight
But don't get too excited everything is gentle until
The inner lion in me just couldn't keep still
My inner lion roars and things speed up
No longer making love we begin to ****
The gorilla bust out your chest as well as mine
There is so much grabbing and holding no one took there time
I become the mosquito and **** you dry
You  are satisfied all the animals in us hide
We both lay down and begin to cuddle
Go to sleep to reveal our *** in the jungle

When i was younger i was sweet and so shy
Igrew older moved around now living a messed up life
I sit back with a heart as cold as snow
I bet id you looked in my eyes you still wont know
See at home it is Hard for me
All night i got to hear Chris get that and do this please
But your pleases are not pleasurable from what i see
At age fifthteen and i already want to leave
Im supposed to love to be home with my family
Instead I'd rather leave cant u see
got to hear my dad call my moms a *****
But when i was younger it was a struggle ***** u didn't do ****
I try to leave the situation alone and my mind still goes
And on this paper as you read it's my heart that flows
Go to school for what my family don't give a ****
So ill drop out leave your **** and do what i can
I had dreams of finishing school and going to college
I am smart a heart of love and brain full of knowledge
When i start to do something good something brings me down
Can u imagine how many times i have seen the ground
I feel like I'm too young to go through so much stress
A child shouldn't be introduced to so much mess
So i ask who will free the little kid in me
Who only wants to do the right thing and just be free
Again i ask who will free the Lil kid in me
Who will listen to my problems and let me breath
Who will bring me happiness and love i can see
someone please tell me who will free the kid in me