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Shaylie May 2021
Before I slip away
Again
Underneath my own skin
Tell me
You love me
You love me

Before I push you away
Again
In front of this monster
Hold me
Hold me

I’m okay
I’m okay
Until I’m not
Shaylie Mar 31
You remember passion is there
And then like a wave
It subsides
Leaving you
Marooned in reality
But I love you anyway
I love you fiercely right down to my bones
Shaylie Sep 2021
This can’t be this hard
For just me
Right?
Right???
Shaylie Jul 2021
Don’t you see
I’m so in
Love with you
Listen,
I can’t live without you
And I wish you were
Near me now
Shaylie Sep 2022
Boys don’t ride on horses
Or speak carefully
Boys break bones
And they
Bellow with rage
Guttural scream
Boys are not gentle
They do not smell
Of cream
Shaylie May 2022
You say
You’re so much sometimes

And I say to that
Well sometimes,
You are not enough
Shaylie Jul 2021
I cry so deep
I feel the river flowing through
My chest
Deep, white water, ripping through me

I can’t believe you did this
You did this again
Shaylie Jun 2023
Emptiness
Dryness
Fills up these lines
More than passion has
In the last
Two years
I’m on my own
Wandering the dessert again
Shaylie Sep 2021
Don’t make me wait
Pick up the phone
Call me
I’ll answer
We can talk and talk
I just want to hear you
Shaylie Aug 2021
“You’ve been done
So *****
So many times”

You did me the filthiest
Didn’t you
You absolutely *******
Wrecked me
Shaylie Jul 2022
I know you don’t feel how I feel, and that’s okay, I’m okay with that. It’s insurmountable though, the way I feel. I don’t want to have any day where I don’t live with you, wake up with you, wait on you to get off work to have dinner with you. These are things I know  you don’t really consider, and that’s because you don’t feel the way I do. But it’s so hard for me. To know you are moving, to know you are leaving. I could spend every single day with you.
You are the funniest, most intelligent, most considerate, amazing person I have ever met. I have soaked up every single moment I have spent with you these last few months, and even though **** happened, you really are the first person to make me feel appreciated and seen. Maybe you don’t do all the extra stuff because we never reached that level, but you have just been a good person to me. You are wonderful, and I wish so badly that I could make you feel the way I feel. But you can’t force people to see someone a certain way, can you? It didn’t matter what we did here, the only way I would have never gotten attached is if I literally ****** and left and never talked to you, and the reason I say that is because in any other scenario I am always going to see you, spend time with you, learn what kind of person you are, and fall in love with you all over again. Im sorry for all the stress and worry, I am sorry for clawing at you like a satin table cloth slipping off a polished wood dining table to stay. I just wanted to spend every moment with you. I don’t think anyone would feel differently than how I do.
Shaylie Jun 2023
Boys want this
And boys want that
Dress this way so you will get a boy
Sit up straight
Cross your legs
So the boy doesn’t think
You are trash
Wear pants
Don’t make eye contact
With the boy
He’ll
Eat you up
Won’t he
It’s his world
That’s what they tell you
But he’ll give you roses
He’ll love you
And they’ve taught him to be gentle
But somehow never cry
Because it’s your job
To be weak
Shaylie Jun 2023
I can’t remember anymore
What is it like
When someone can not
Keep their lips from yours
I am lonely and it’s late
That’s the only reason I care
I am numb
Over and over
I feel nothing
Shaylie May 2024
I can’t possibly understand how it could be anyone other than you
I thought maybe we finally had our chance
Our day beneath the honeysuckle
I miss you
Trying to figure out why you’d stop
Talking to me
I want to finally share that meal
So much time has passed and
I’m almost 30 now
Please call me
Please call me
Shaylie May 2
I wish you’d call
A thousand times I wish you’d call
But instead I’m up at midnight
Making eggs in a basket
Thinking of you
How much I love you
Shaylie Aug 2022
Somedays
I feel too pretty for you
And others
I crawl beneath your shoes
And ask you to
Step on me
Shaylie Apr 2019
Time still
Changes everything

Even if you choose
To stay still
Shaylie Jun 17
I am baking in the sunshine
Basking in the mighty height of Oregon trees
I just wanted to share that with you
I wanted to tell you that even when you aren’t here
Even when you are combing your daughters hair
And even when I’m standing on this mountain
I love you
Shaylie Jan 2023
I am not supposed to be here
I am supposed to be with you
So please make it quick
Take me with you
Shaylie Aug 2021
So it goes
The same song
Repeating
Repeating
Repeating
In my head

I forget it
I forget you
White noise
Shaylie Apr 2019
It doesnt matter who I want to be
I dont want to be me.
Shaylie Jun 2021
Is that you
Calling me from
Unknown numbers

Or am I dreaming
Shaylie Jan 13
Sometimes
I think about the brief moment in time and space
where I experienced real love
With someone who loved me back
Someone who wanted to be with me
And sacrificed it all

I wonder if we can be together when we’re old

And then I move along with the regularly scheduled programming
Just another day
Another moment
Shaylie May 18
I miss you
I love you
I wish I could see you
All the usual things
Shaylie Aug 2021
I still love you
Stupid
Shaylie Jun 2021
I was so, so happy
With you
Shaylie Sep 2021
There is a loneliness
That lingers here
Without you
Shaylie Aug 2023
I am sitting in traffic
And I’m wondering
Is it immature to wish
There is some universe where I got
One over on you
Where I called the lawyers first
Where I didn’t lose my job
One where Gabriel and I
Move to Colorado
And I don’t have to answer to you
Shaylie Jan 2021
I loved you to the ends of the earth and back
Because not every hill was shaved perfectly
Not every beautiful curve of the earth dips perfectly
There is magma and typhoons
And I love you
Shaylie Aug 2023
It’s five am and I’m thinking about
How I use to be sad if you departed
without giving me kisses
Now we can not even get through
One phone call without
Being at each others
Throats
Shaylie Apr 6
Here I am
Missing you hard enough
I wonder if I keep missing you hard enough
you might
Materialize right here
If I close my eyes
I could solidify you
Make you real
In my head you are driving to me
Or maybe someone drives you to me
But it’s not really
And tomorrow comes
Shaylie Nov 2018
I like the comfort you provided me,
But passion here only existed in between big words,
I dont like you.
Shaylie Apr 6
I wish I knew
why you won’t
Talk to me
Shaylie Apr 4
It has to mean something
That we think of each other
At the same time of day
Shaylie Sep 2021
I won’t talk to you again
Atleast not until I graduate
That’s what I keep saying
Five months
Shaylie Mar 2022
I crave the security
In the foundation never placed
Here’s your hard hat kid
And your concrete
Do it all yourself
Lay it all yourself

I crave security
Shaylie Apr 6
When you read my poems
Does it feel like your talking to me
If you close your eyes right now
Can you hear me
Whispering in your ear
Can you remember what my voice sounds like?
Shaylie Apr 3
And if my poetry proves anything
Let it be proof
That I haven’t ever stopped loving you
Since I laid my eyes on you again
Shaylie Apr 15
There is a certain level of respect
You must carry for the person you built a life with
Experienced things with
But they will never be the one who pops into your head
When you read poetry about love
Or songs about things you can’t put into words
I’d move mountains
And split the sky
Just to be next to you

-please talk to me-
Shaylie Jul 2024
Rage burns inside me
It’s so easy to spit your own poison back at you
One way or another
It just hurts
Instead I sit here
Fire turns into hot tears
Rushing down my face
Burns ditches in lines
I wonder if karma is real
How do you continue to get away with this
Shaylie Nov 2021
Sometimes
I forget
I forget who I am

What I want
What I like
Shaylie Apr 2022
We are
Just flesh and bone
But you
You are the sun on my skin
Shaylie Jun 2021
Oh,
How I miss being
Near you
Shaylie Sep 2023
I’m the same artist
In every different stanza
You see different people
Different women
But we are all the same
Shaylie Dec 2021
I don’t feel like
I have a seat on any bus
There is no slot
For me to fit into
Where do I go?
What do I do?
Shaylie Aug 2021
Roses are red
Violets are blue
*******
I love you
I miss you
I hate you
You hate me too
Shaylie Jan 2024
In my memories
You belong to me
And we belong to each other
It’s a sacred place
Shaylie Apr 2021
I hope my gaze
Is burned into your brain
So when you and her
And
Her and you
Are in that space
You hate yourself
Shaylie Nov 2024
I wish so badly,
To not know small things about you,
Give me something that makes me dislike you
Shaylie Mar 13
Ive been exhausted
I’ve eat the dirt and
I’ve drowned before
I almost died
Maybe once or twice
But I’m still here
I’m still here I could appreciate
The sun, the moon, and the stars
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