They shoot the blackbirds
In locked cages
For singing of living freely.
They say
"No! No! No!
Those birds are insane
Bums
Losers
Dead to society.
Now,
Go to work
Go to school
Stop at stop signs
Marry
Have children
And pay taxes."
But I heard the lunatic chirping
Riding on the echo
Of a shotgun blast
It said
"Nothing really matters
And the people aren't as important
As they think.
The boundaries they set
Never really existed.
Now quit your job
Throw your wallet in the garbage
And run naked in the streets"
It sounded beautiful
And I can't seem
To get its ringing
Out of
My skull.
How long should I
Pluck
These black feathers
Of mine?

It was some part of me.
The mind
Or the soul
Or the madness
Or the love
Or the the hate
Or the loneliness.
It was the part of me
That burned so HOT
All the time
Until it finally seemed
To burn out.
Black ash swept across the tile
Into a messy pile in the corner.
That part of me just sat there
For months
Incinerated by the world
By its people
By its misfortunes.
Then the wind kicked the ash up
And the curtains caught fire
And the wall paint blistered
And the whole *******
Building burned down.
They tried to douse my fire
But it spread wildly.
The trees
The city
The ocean started to burn.
The sun began to weep.
The inferno could not
Be stopped.
It was
My time
Again.

I really thought I had you
Tied down.
My personal tamed tiger
Confined to the bedroom
To the kitchen
To my fears of outside.
But then I kept walking in on you
Staring out the window.
It's silly.
I never thought you'd figure out
That you deserved much better
Than me.
Since you walked out
I've been sitting at this window
Staring
For years.
But
I still don't see it.

Ok! Ok!
It ripped my vicious alcoholic talons off easily.
Like I was some cheap
$9.99 for a 12 piece
Dispensible chicken.
The doctor said "Your rotting
From the inside out.
Look, look at your face,
Your rotting."
The body has given up.
The mind has wandered somewhere
Wild.
"No more coffee or alcohol, you have to eat better. think about your kidneys."
"I'll try."
I sit around
Tired and bored
Like everybody else
Last week I was a howling inferno
Now I sleep for ten hours every day.
Uninterested in poetry,books,music.
Oh life,
You selfish *****!
Always finding something to take
Even when i think there is
Nothing left.
Another come down.
Another dreadful
Peacefulness.
I knew it all along!
Sanity is so ******
Dull.

Here she comes now
See the rattlesnakes slither into
Hiding
Among the dying flowers?
Here she comes now.
Like warm blankets for the Indians
Like an infants crib turned casket
Like warm memories devoured by
Alzheimer's.
Remember all the nights you spent
Crying for her?
Here she comes now.
The assassin cuddles up closely
Running soft fingers over your bare chest.
Over your heart.
Here she is.
Remember the nights you thought
Suicide might be more tolerable
Than loneliness?
Here she is.
Staring deep into your tired,sorry eyes.
Into your needy soul.
You wanted her so badly.
Remember?
She does.
She pulls down her pants
And climbs into your bed
And you climb into her
There she is.
Your next death.
You feel so big
And so ******
Small again.

I used to think about her
When I masturbated in
The shower.
She was my girlfriends
Best friend
She was petite
With the fattest ***
I've ever seen
On a 100 lb. white girl.
And when my girlfriend left me
The white girl called a few days later.
She came over one night
And I undressed her
And she had these long cutting scars
Climbing up horizontally
On the side of each thigh.
And as I looked down at my naked self,
There were cigarette burns and a stab wound, and the time I made a cross on my knee with a broken ashtray.
It was beautiful.
Two scarred humans
Lying in bed
Making love.
That night she licked the disgusting stab wound
On my shoulder
Then asked
"Can I cut you, baby?"
"Sure" I said.
I am always fascinated by the numbness
Alcohol produces.
And she hacked away at me.
Then she carved a heart into my arm
And I carved one into her thigh
But hers didn't scab up as well as mine.
Then we fell asleep drunk
In each others arms.
Blood and love and *** and loneliness
All mixed up in the bed.
I used to ******* to her in the shower
Before all of that happened.
Maybe that's what made it so hard
When she left me.

I opened the mini fridge to
Keep the roaches away from my
Crunchy honey peanut butter and
Apple jam.
I pushed aside the southern comfort
And saw a hunk of shining tin foil
I opened it up
"Ohh yeah...****..."
It was all of my love
But the tears had evaporated.
It smelled a bit stale.
And the edges were starting to
Harden.
I took a bite.
"Still good."
I couldn't let it go to waste.
But what to do with it?
I couldnt eat it myself, that would be
Odd.
Like performing self *******.
So I called an old girlfriend
"Hey I still have a big hunk of this, it would be a shame to have it spoil."
"No... No. That stuff started to make
Me sick. Last time I had it I broke out
In hives."
"Alright,well...how've you been?"
"Great!"
"Great." Great.
I stuck the foil into my pocket and walked outside.
Somebody might want it.
I saw a homeless women
Sitting cross legged in a pile of filth.
"Spare change?"
"Can't. But I have this..."
She looked at it and frowned.
"The hell am I gonna do with THAT?"
I was starting to think this stuff was
Useless.
I took another bite.
If I could perform self ******* I
Probably would.
Then I threw a piece into a pile of
Manure.
And, I'll be ******. A flower sprouted.
It looked like a sunflower with
Cactus quills.
I threw a piece to a pigeon and it took it and it
Turned into some kind of
Raven-peacock and it
Screamed and flew towards the sun.
I took a piece and threw it to the ants
And their hill turned into a mountain
That shined like a diamond.
I'll be ******...
The stuff is still
Good.
I put the rest into my pocket
As I crossed the street
And I heard a car screech.
I looked up quickly
And shouted
"WHATS YOUR PROBLEM *******???!!!"
And banged on the hood.