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 Jun 2015 Nicole Ashley
Sjr1000
When your mind is shattered
Your eyes are blinded
There is pain everywhere
you go
Don't give up and
Don't give in

When the wheel of fortune
is stuck at 6
No hope remains
Don't give up
Don't give in
Noon will be coming around
again

When loneliness is
your only friend
and
it keeps calling you names
Don't give up
and
Don't give in

There are times
when life is
ablaze with horrors
but
Don't give up
and Don't give in

Those that survive
are those that find meaning
those that passively
take to their bed
are bound
to
perish
Don't give up
Don't give in

When the law's
got your name
and no payment can be
made
and
you have to go
along with their plans
that have been laid,
Inside, where you hide
Don't give up and
Don't give in.

Time only stops
once
Don't give up
Don't give in.
Last night, I got kisses.
They weren't sweet kisses,
They weren't soft kisses.

They were sharp kisses,
They were swift kisses.
They were the kind of kisses that leave marks.

They were the kind of kisses that sting.
They were peppering kisses,
They were lightning kisses.

They were biting kisses,
They were a blade's kisses.
They were the kinds of kisses I regret.

They were the kinds of kisses that sting for days.
They were silver kisses,
They turned into red kisses.

They weren't my first kisses,
They weren't my last kisses.
Last night, I got kisses.
to tell the truth, i'm actually really fricking proud of this.
In many ways, I'm still that little girl
The little girl who was told she was ugly, the little girl who hid from mirrors
The little girl who stayed in packs, for fear of being alone with her mind
The little girl who learned from the reactions of others, not to speak, but to write her madness into rhyme

-s.n
There is no poem I've written that gets more raw than this...
A worn out face and soul I hide behind other parts I play.
He's asleep, slowly waking up, he can only be energized by his daughter's presence today.
Yet she maybe is unaware of his father's existence
it wouldn't be strange, we're nearing a full year
I pray day to day she's not unaware, truth be told it's my biggest fear
it's hard to hold on to hope
when all you've got is memories
and an old picture on your desk
All these questions and doubts I got
a beating rhythm in my head
every tear I shed embodies my love for you
every tear I shed is because I'm missing you
I pray you don't ever forget that I'm your dad.

I remember being scared to death the first night home.
As I focused on your breathing and I pictured you behind closed eyes
I slept shallow and checked multiple times to see if you were still alive
My biggest fear then was losing you... and two years later I did
and now I've missed a year experiencing you turning into a kid.

I bet you're cheeky, witty and stubborn. Curious, full of love, sensitive and have a deep intelligence. So now I'm fighting to get you back, giving it my all. To continue setting an example, to show you that you've gotta fight for those dear to you, to show you the power a person can have. And if by some stupid lies I lose this fight, I promise you Sara look for me when you're old enough and you'll realize dad always got your back. I won't give up on you.. EVER
You'll hear an other side of a story but I won't impose my opinion on you. I will give my side of the truth and let you decide from there.

Know that I would rather endure an entire life of this heavy burden and pain and take it to my grave then let you say you had a father who gave up halfway.

In three days you'll turn three. I'm sorry I can't be there Sara but I promise I'm doing everything in my power to see you as soon as possible. In advance I wish you a happy birthday, your birthday present is going to be a bit late though. Bear with me, it's on it's way.

I love you.

Writen with tears of sincerity, a strong soul and a loving heart,

Your father Stevie Ray de Vries Andries.

ps. You're always way to young to have any boyfriends, ever. ;) Dad will put them to the test. If they're unworthy Spartan-Kick them out of the house and if they are you'll sleep in seperate beds. And if he does treat you with the honor and respect you deserve.. I'll think about letting you sit next to eachother on the couch. Haha...
 May 2015 Nicole Ashley
Day Wing
Sometimes, when I watch the stars
I wonder if they watch us too

I wonder if we, humans, amaze them
Grace the view that they see
Sparkle a light that they admire
Or maybe otherwise
I wonder if we scare them
Upset their lives with our presence
Disgust them with our dark hearts

I wonder if they deem us a splendid beauty
Or a horrible horrible mistake
 May 2015 Nicole Ashley
glassea
racism is when
you can't change an
already arbitrary
label to mixed
because you
"look white"
 May 2015 Nicole Ashley
glassea
you think with your lungs
and breathe with your heart.

every day we begin a war.
we are the staunchest allies,
the most formidable of foes.
i fight to clear you a path.
you fight free of my shadow.

my mind is a river
with predictable course
and clear motivation.
your mind is the sun:
draped with golden flares,
burning even when unseen,
powered by something cosmic.

you say you see silver
out of the corner of your eye.
i don't tell you what i know:
you see the stars that one day
you will conquer.
i'm fortunate enough to have a supernova for a sister.
 May 2015 Nicole Ashley
josin137
They say time heals,
But really, **time kills.
How long more do I have to wait for time to erase you ?
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