I feel like I get get better.
Feel as if my life choices melt and grind into a shredder. I look in the mirror and see nothing but flaws.
How does one rise from a mountain of flaws?
How does one find a way?

For a change I'd fight for it. Never went the way i visioned it. My dad raised me to be independent, but he also showed his cold side. I begin to beg along with the dark where I tend to hide, I don't think I have that ounce so I am going to try to be confident.
Is this part of a life lesson? Or do I just miss a rout out? No one said it was easy, but would some one please for this last time guide me. I fell so out of luck, Been like this for a good while.
The sun would rise, still tears falling down from my eyes. what do I do now. things in my head just scream out loud. Music let me find what I need, replace the bad in my instrument. Help me avoid the bleed, then cure my attempt.
For a change I am going to have sleep as an offense, then use my lyrics as my defense. Please try me I will refuse the trash but accept defeat if it happens. Give me a smile then i can wink. Just tell me how it'll be okay because i clearly don't know what to think. All these tears begin to fade. soon it froze on my face and then Melts to my skin and won't break. I want to do good, I want to do everything i can to at least be a part of something that matters to me. For the time being all these problems shall go away, or at least guide me to my true strength to finish the rep.

His family got the end of his night terrors, and he's battling a nightmare. He didn't know, no amout pleads for forgiveness because that had been buried a long time ago. Then broken promises took control. Off with his respect. He needs to stop it and let go. Here's my true sincere opinion. I'm a mess and I shouldn't be chillin. I should roll up my sleeves, plant something healthy. Water my world, grow mental stability. Honestly I'd be happy for myself to change. Even if I lost the people in my world. I'm a be successful eventually. Once upon a broken heart, plot twist I broke it myself. I'll seek help. I'll give the world some space. Shooting for the stars at my own pace. It's never easy but it'll be honest work. Off with my disrespect here's my mistakes. Let's recycle to reduce bad habits. Sobriety I'm reaching up for you and here's my time you can have it.

No check point. No way I've got enough health. Starting to lose, got no choice but I've got to move. Sure I level up, barely make a dub. But shots fires and I'm sad as ****. Just lost in the past, have to really i wont get her back. Single player, no one to heal me later. I've had false hope hanging me by the strand. Wish I was the right man. At a battle again, low health. Nobody to save me. Wish I wasn't so crazy. Been a ******* loser lately. No memory card so i cant repeat a check point. Game over!

I began to feel like I'm barely enough. Let alone dealing with myself has been a little tough. I had noticed that the broken ones break down your walls after a repair. No worries, that made me realize my gaurds were weak. I refuse to lose sleep. I'm just trying to be happy. Even if it's "simply not meant to be"
I've ran long enough on thin ice. But only thing that cracked was my heart. Time to swim before I fall a part.

I need music with the right beat. Words freely coming to my mind but I can hardly speak. About to hesitate, with a heartache, possibly about to deteriorate, I'm a contemplate, everyone's fake, not about to break, risking it all but that's  what I'm a take, didn't mean for anyone to break, give it time with a rate, musics loud this is great.
How many times will I shine, star light that's mine, doing this all the time, need a Corona with a lime, back on the grind, secretly trying to be fine, but rejoice is something I'm a find, not looking behind, I'm just too kind.
Like lately, been crazy, maybe, where's my baby,  emotionally waving, I'm saving, love craving, feelings levitating.
Dear Nel, you surprised hell, but oh well, do tell, did it burn when you fell, was it a spell, you stuck in a shell? Come on man, help me understand, I'm a fan, how'd you start off was it a crayon, hard to keep up so i ran.
What's love, looking up, high above, i won't pry nor shove, look a dove!
Impossible! unstoppable!
Forgettable, debatable, realtable?
I'm a play on the swing and let the words free, no tax fee going to let it all be. So tell me who's next to criticize me.

My guts told me her pleads for me isn't enough. My mind went numb and I'm paralyzed because this wasn't love. A fake, a distraction, a cheat. I guess I'm destined to be lonely. I thought you were serious when you said I was your only. Now I'm dropping tears while my hearts storming. Why me? Why lie? You met my family, I kept life private for a reason. I let you in but I guess you were the one teasing. Now it makes sense. Not once did I get a goodnight or a goodbye. All I've got were hellos and fake *** compliments. The time frame of me talking and calling was all a joke to you. **** my heart hearts. You did t even give me the benefit of the doubt, I'm out. My tears form as you're patching things with your man. I can't believe I was your side piece, I just don't understand. **** me for almost being happy. I guess I had a dream, but now I'm not at peace. You really ******* hurt me.

It takes all you have to be noticed sometimes
it can be work, a sport, music, hell even just in general to "blend"
never mattered how much you bled or sweat cried
all it mattered was for you to reach your objective.
Let me tell you something about being good enough.
I never shot for my looks fame power money how i can act or how good i look when i do the so called dope thing people do now a days.
Being good enough is pain, flaws, tears, bleed once in a while, sweating, improving.
Being good enough is when you can look at your loved ones in the eye and say i gave you my all.
it is dedicating and committing to what is important all around.
you have to say ***** you with a smile on your face and be able to wink at the hate and knock it off on their ***.
who cares if you cry?
I cry like you do!
I bleed like you do!
I sweat like you do!
I love like anyone can love, i care like anyone else can care.
We all are one.
we cry, we sleep, we eat, we fight, we just need to realize gossip isn't the goal to succeed.
Being so called perfect ain't worth your time.
I was taught the real meaning of good enough.
If what i told you makes sense you my friend have experienced a true success in your life. people may not say your good enough, but if you went through and looked them in the eye with tears rushing down your face admitting you gave it full blood and tear, then you are the success. if you gave it full commitment and dedication you are the best, but if you gave up what means a lot just to accomplish whats needed and suffered through it and survived the you are Good enough. you just have to be you and fight for it all.

If hellos were meant to be goodbyes,
then would I be telling the truth or a lie?

Once I've accepted for her to barking out the calls. An obsessive narcissistic *******. I've made plenty mistakes darling I'm not all that innocent. But with you I saw improvement.  Put trust in your arms, squeezing the insecurities out of me. Bet your *** honey you're now past tense. Tell me how my efforts were your power and monopoly. Games over I've never played because it's easier to ignore. That should of been a sign to walk out that door. It's my house, I don't owe you anymore!