To taste her lips
is to drink her soul.

I keep our love alive by
Finding you in every sunflower.
It is in them that our love blossoms-
every word, every smile, every touch
held in every petal and
every seed.

I think back
to when we first met and
compare it to where we are now...
what happened?

How can you say you're
empty when the universe
is inside of you?

6:15 PM
28/5/22

Something tells me
that this withering sunflower
inside my chest will bloom again
once I find my way
back to you.

What is worse:
the ending or forgetting
how to begin again?
We have a choice not to
give into the destruction and despair
or rebuild from the ruins of
what came before.

I suppose you think
that your coldness comes from the
warmth of your heart?

2:31 PM
22/8/21

You, a bee,
dashing from flower to flower,
leaving them in a field of smiles.
We wish you the sweetest pollen
and sunshine to guide you home.

Dear diary;
tonight,
my memories
are my moon as I
sit beneath the stars
basking in the twilight
of you and I.

Who is a poet,
without their pen?
Our existence is on the page-
it is the stories in our head
and the words in our heart.

Grandma lied about
girls being all over me
once I got older

3:25 PM
20/2/21

Dear diary;
This lockdown has taken
my mind on a roller-coaster.
Up and down,
and everything in between.
I think I'm used to the vertigo
of this new way of life
and some days that's enough
of a victory.

We can see the galaxies
beyond the Milky Way
the way we can see the pain
beyond our smiles.

A moment together and
a thousand moments apart.
I am forever chasing
your shadow and the
night will soon be upon us.
What does distance know
of heartbreak?

If you do not want
to be happy with me then
it is not true love

5:01 PM
3/3/20

Sometimes
two souls find each other
through the crowds and chaos
and a magic blooms:
Two hearts
become one.

Like the sunset,
you slip away,
oh so beautiful,
but dark is this world
once you are gone.

This heartache screams your name,
a thrashing storm that leaves
this heart in ruin.
Your thunder has
sliced open this heart
but these memories are made of sunshine.

If you get sick of me,
then I wish your days are
filled with happiness but
when the night comes,
I may not be there
to say goodnight.

For too many reasons,
this month feels like
a memory
already.

The truth is I can't
be away from you for long-
I miss your smile

6:55 PM
19/12/21

This love
hurts so good-
I wonder how long
the 'good' part
will last.

Letting go is hard-
letting go is necessary.
It can lead to freedom but
it does not come without pain-
a small price to pay
for this peace of mind.
I am free today because I let go
and I make no regrets.

I was walking in circles
trying to reach you
in your corner:
unattainable.
But fate intervened,
bridging our parallel worlds.
Just like that,
love bridged our paths.

If I would have known
I would have called you more often
and make sure you were never forgotten.
If I would have known
I would have laughed extra harder
and made sure to smile even wider
If I would have known
I would have thanked you for being you
and being there for all we've been through.
If I would have known
I would not have taken you for granted
they way you made life more enchanted.
If I would have known
I wish I had opened up more
after all that's what family is for.
If I would have known
I would have hugged you even tighter-
yours had a way of making life lighter.
if I would have known
I would have told you that I love you
and this grief I wish I could undo.

It does not
matter to me if this love
lasts one day or a lifetime,
you will last in my heart
forever.

One day
you'll look back
and be glad things did
not work out.
Sometimes,
someone new takes you
by surprise and you wouldn't
have had it any
other way.

All alone with the
voices in your head.
Now I'm face to face
with the living dead.

I sabotaged
my ability to love
with my inability to love.
It's as simple
as that.

There was a sunflower
that stood alone on a hill
in the darkest of days.
Still, it lit up the field
and inspired me to write these words.
How many days had it been there,
alone yet amazing?
So lucky I was to find this hidden treasure,
its seed now planted in this heart.

Sometimes just being
comfortable with someone is
really just enough

10:55 AM
16/9/21

It’s funny that for
the most part, we forget that
we are so alone.

11:12 PM
25/2/20

Dear diary;
I cannot handle my mind anymore.
The world is moving too fast
and the thoughts keep racing.
Society is foreign to me as they are cruel,
and I cannot handle them anymore.

The torture doctor
put me under
with her smile
and charm.
She cut my heart
until the love poured out
and just like that,
she had concluded
her operation.

Another day of
wishing these words belonged to
a special someone

5:42 PM
30/8/21

I feel as if
I am a refugee
in my own life
still in search of a
home I will
never know.

There is no place I can go
that you will not follow
and no thought
that you can escape.
There are no days
that I forget you
for each second is spent
longing for you.

There are so many
people who have entered my life
and have left behind a piece of them
in my heart.
What an honor it has been,
to cross paths with all the beautiful people
who still reside in this heart
and these memories.
Thank you for for the memories,
the growth, the lessons and the joy
and I hope we can
cross paths again.

Every dawn,
I plant a sunflower in your name,
so that when dusk comes,
and a million sunflowers fill the fields,
our love will blossom
for years to come.

Our memories
bleeds through my pen
and onto the page.
Though I don't get to see
you smile anymore,
your beauty still shines
through my words.

Does heartbreak
keep track of time?
Years have passed and yet
the cracks will not subside.
Time has a way of morphing
heartbreak and grief
into a loneliness-
a shadow that
follows me around.
At least now I know
that the answer
is yes.

You fill my life
with sunflowers the way
you light up the room
with nothing but your smile.

I miss you.
I wait for your
sunflowers to bloom so that
I may feel your warmth once again.
Do not blossom away from me
ever again,
I have dwelled in this darkness
for far too long and
it is your light that I
held onto after all
this time.

Why do you expect
everyone to like you when
you don't like
everyone?

We all
get a little lonely sometimes,
that's okay,
because that's what it means
to be lonely in this
little lonely world.

Dear diary;
Sometimes,
my emotions don't
line up with my actions-
what's up
with that?
It makes me want to scream
into the void-
why am I like this?
Why am I so broken?

We are all
children of the sun,
but you outshine
all seven-billion
who walk this Earth.
Daughter of the sun,
share with us your light
and lead us out of darkness.
Daughter of the sun,
shower us with warmth-
this place is cold without you.

Being social can be
quite overrated, can't it?
Friday nights should be for
going for strolls somewhere new,
driving around slowly whilst
listening to your favorite tunes,
reading books, writing poetry,
sighing at memories missed
and wondering if it will
ever be that good again.

Is it a blessing
or a curse
to find poetry in
anything and everything?
To seek out its beauty,
its faults,
and everything in between?
One might call it a gift,
but me,
I'm not so sure.

I was never good
at saying goodbye.
Sometimes, things are better left unsaid,
but overall, I think goodbyes are
preferable to the silence.
Goodbyes can hurt,
but they can also bring closure.
So, while goodbyes are not my strong suit,
they are often necessary
to avoid a lifetime of
uncertainty.