You won't love me anymore

When we fight one night
And I'm slamming doors
I'll wake up the next morning
And pretend nothing happened
And you won't love me anymore

I seldom apologize
When I know I'm at fault
I always apologize
For being myself
And you won't love me anymore

I'm afraid of being alone
And I know that there will
Come a time that
You'll want to be alone
And you won't love me anymore

I was engulfed in the stars
As you pulled me onto your lap
My body was on the earth
But my head was in outer space
I laughed as we fumbled
Inside your car
Nights like these never get old
You kissed me and
I felt myself falling
From the realm of darkness
I was enclosed in

You kissed me and
I spent the rest of the night
Crying
Because finally someone cared

You kissed me and
I got a full night of sleep
For the first time in years

You kissed me
And I
Was among the clouds

You told me you'd much rather wither
Than spend another day of wasted time
I shifted my glance to the other direction
I felt a chill send signals down my spine
You left without a warning
I gave you whatever was left of me
And you said I didn't try

I'm worried I'll end up as I began
Needles in my arm
And a tall strange man

April 2012
The needles were inserted
Into my bruising arms
I was dehydrated
I was hungry
They pumped me full of sugars
The doctor was a man
Well over 40
He told me I didn't try hard enough

November 2014
Needles were pushed through my vulnerable skin
My veins were pumped full of drugs
I don't even know what I'm on
I don't even care
There's a man's face somewhere in the blur
He's tall and has tattoos
I feel his tongue in my mouth
And his hands reaching for under my skirt
I don't care
I don't have to try anymore

A girl about seven
Sits still - full of doom
It's 2 in the morning
And she's scared to leave her room

A ghostly girl with bad intentions
A skeleton made of gold
She filled the air with a cold infection
And let the people mold

They didn't believe her when she was small
So maybe now they'll listen
A ghost haunting the walls
Of a place she once called home