to my ladies out there
who need to take
a little time
for themselves
once in a while
listen up
you are nobody's last resort
you do not always have to be there
you are not a toy
you can do it
so stop convincing yourself
you can't
wipe the tears off your own cheeks
pick yourself up off the floor
put away the Ben and Jerry's
hold your own girl
be proud of yourself
because nobody does you
better than you do

I can't read
Romance novels
Anymore
Because every kiss
The characters share
Makes me long
For your
Presence

I know exactly how your lips will feel
The moment before they brush mine
Yet your kisses never fail
To take my breath away

I know exactly the path your fingers will trace
Along my cheek to the back of my neck
Yet your touch never fails
To electrocute my skin

I know exactly the look in your eyes
Before you lean your face towards mine
Yet your gaze never fails
To paralyze me

We are an oxymoron
Inexplicable
But we are also puzzle pieces
Perfectly seamless

Digging a little deeper
In the pit of my
Worthlessness
You crush me
With the weight of your
Unspoken honesty
And pent up
Hatred

I cannot describe the feeling
That pulses through me
Every time your lips
Dust across mine
With a smile

My only explanation
Is each kiss
Causes another crack
In my already
Splintered heart

You make me so mad
It blinds me
I'm choking on my words
Trying to
Spit them
Down your throat
I won't play your games
I'm done
Feeding into your little
Twisted fantasy
I'm the only person
Who isn't afraid
To tell you the
Truth
To your face
It's not my problem
If you can't accept
The truth
And an apology
Enjoy eternal loneliness

Do you want to know why
I write so much poetry about you?
Yeah
Sometimes I wonder too

Maybe it's because I never wanted
To be over you
You neglected me for months
So I forced myself
Out of love
But never really fell
Out of love

Maybe it's because you're my best friend
Or you used to be
Things will never be the same again
As much as I wish
They could be

Maybe it's because you're the first
Love of my life
And you're still so present
It's hard to be around you
And not be in love with you

Maybe it's because I cant move on
The way you are
I don't want to fall in love again
Because I don't want to forget you
But you're trying to
Forget me

So ill keep filling this space
With empty promises
And for-the-nights
I'm not ready for a new lover
Maybe you are
I have no right to care anymore
But I still do

Sometimes I wonder why