I remember fighting through this blur
just to trace your lips with the lightest touch
afraid to smudge your sweetness with my ***** skin:
i hadn't been clean in months, you never noticed.

And I remember laying on your chest,
your heart beat; the sweetest tune to ever taunt my ears
Turning me insane with rythym
but drifting me away on the softest cloud.

I remember looking into your eyes
It got me high, cheeks turned pink and I'd hide
I tried so hard to not let you see the pain in my eyes
I tried so hard to hide everything.

I remember though, that nothing would compare
to the way candles burnt out that night
or the way your words always seemed so true
so beautiful and pure...
Nothing will ever compare to the way your lies made me feel.

It keeps happening, She keeps putting herself in situations
Where she waits and waits, screaming to herself in her head
Staring into the shine of car headlights and the ripple of bath water
Waiting, waiting, waiting to die.
Screaming for the car to speed up, speed up so much
As she slows her pace walking across the road
Almost talking herself into submerging herself
And resisting the pain of drying lungs just to die.
Turning her back on food but hoping to choke on it
Minipulating blades to caress her fading skin.
It all happens before she even realises shes doing it.
Like her body wants to fly so far off that cliff
Without her mind knowing.
I guess, I guess she just wants to die.

If you could, dear, please take a moment
To open yours eyes and see me for real
See me eroding, losing hair, weight, everything,
Evaporating, atleast take the time to see the blood on the knife
It's only small amounts, but it's there, it's real.
If you could, dear, please take a moment
To piece back together this broken puzzle of a million pieces
Be cautious and make sure every piece fits
And i know you don't want to look me in the eye
Because these tears are clouding my iris
But could you please?
Take my hand and tell me to jump
Or atleast lead me to a fountain of hope
Just stitch me back together I beg you!
I am not whole.

Don't ever slay that mighty dragon
It's wings will crush you with the slightest movement 
And it's firey breath will curl around your head. 
You will not win. 

Do nibble on the magic fungi 
It'll show you the unimaginable to dream upon 
And you'll find yourself in a fairytale with the pixies. 

Don't plant those beans
The ones in which you gave a cow for. 
The castle at the top of the stalk
Is not worth your time. 

Do burn the witch, not for all the wrong reasons. 
Let her teach you her black magic ways 
And if she decides to turn against you
Then you have every right to lead her to the stake in chains. 

Black cats are not bad luck. 
If they're nice, they're your friend
Otherwise throw them under the ladder
Or into a mirror. 

The beast is not always a prince under the witches spell. 
Sometimes, he's just a ******* creep. 

The knight in shining armor
Is just a suit against a wall in the castle hallway. 

The wolf is not always there for the baked goods in the straw basket. 
He wants more, your virginity maybe?
He'll steal all he can take which is everything. 

No ***** is ever as pretty as those princesses or damsels in distress. 
Most have the face of the witch
With the mask of a beauty.

Where were you when the sky was falling?
Where were you when the ground opened up
And took me?

Do you ever question your absence
And why you never saw me smile?

Oh, Daddy, dear
You were walking with the beast
When the beauty needed you here.

You could've stopped me from hating you
Before I learnt the meaning of hate and the things you did.

But the front door seemed more appealing
And I'm sorry it did.
You kept walking. You're leaving, you're leaving-
Oh, hell. I blinked and now you're gone.

7, 8, 9... How many years is it now?
Can you count your length of absence to the day?
Or were you too stupid to know what number came next
after day one?

I've thought about meeting you again.
And I've thought of all the reasons you'd come.
You'd only show, just to tell child services
That you know my ******* name
And the colour of my hair-
It's dyed bright red, not that you care.

Then, I thought of all the reasons you wouldn't be there.
You can't remember my existance.
I'm not worth your time.
You're too lazy to even flinch
Or move a finger or blink
To bother with your child.
I'll stop this list now, before it takes away all my ink.

Mother was always right.
Did it hurt when you'd call me? I was only aged four
I'd run away from Mum when she tried to pass me the telephone.

All the time, I see girls who whinge about their father's
And I'd look at the good relationships they have
And feel ill in the stomach with a lump in my throat
To know I've never known what it's like
To not have a deadbeat father.

I remember when we thought,
That together we could out last,
The world and every creation on it,
I remember when we thought,
That together we formed something,
Something that could embody immortality,
The days when I forgot how hard,
It was to breathe and smile,
It finally became natural again,
And I thank thee for that.

Caught up in your eyes,
And the way you swore you'd defy time,
Just to see me smile, be forever mine,
I never thought about tomorrow,
What would happen, who would die,
Who's smile would fall, who's feelings would fade,
We never thought or spoke of the things,
That were worth saying, and now,
We're frozen in regret saying goodbye,
To the ones we loved, ones we forgot.

I always hated the way
Your face burnt into the sun
'Cause you became the reason
That everything shone.
It always meant
That I could never wash you
Out of my brain
'Cause no one can ever get
Close enough to the sun
To rid it of you.
Rainy days soon became my favourite
A sort of cleasning; a break from you.
My house also soon became a comfort
So did shadey trees, and clouds
They always blocked your face
And shielded me from the sun.

& I'm ******* drowning again
In all these thoughts of you.
Rescue me.

The heights of these walls
Used to be so high
One could not see the top
& now, you've crawled over them
Again.

Take me out the back
& shoot me down
I don't need this pain
But somehow,
I want it.

The taste of your lips.
Sweet.

Your touch on my hips.
Soft.

Uh **** this.
I still love you,
Come back.