Just give up,
Stop caring -im a lost cause.
Just forget it,
Love kills - i want to feel strong.
let sadness take me -
And happiness fade so far away.
Let pain feast up
Make it last forever, please.
Listen to me -
I dont need your love.
Watch me closely -
I am okay without you!
There are places Ill never go
Experiences Ill never have
Believe me- im good with that.
I like the way
Sadness tastes.
I am addicted to
This pain.
Just give it up already
Im a lost ******* cause.

Some people cut
Others cry and scream
Most drink, but you
Do something more extreme.

You live above us
Watching this ****** up place
and you see so.much pain
Yet theres a smile on your face.

People get beaten down
I get pushed around
Like other children with
Dark bruises big and round.

Love, oh love, oh my love,
You're killing us all
Dont you see
We break more each fall.

Some people cut
Others cry and scream
most drink but you
Do something more extreme.

You love an laugh
Oh and how you lie
Awful friend seeing us
Hurt, why dont you cry?

Sleep is important, I know this now,
especially when I will be talking to you
at 2 a.m. because no one else is awake
enough to hear the things we say or
the secrets we love to share.

Last night, I was really not myself,
I couldn't have been cause you called me
just to hear me laugh or at least have
proof I was not drowning in tears or
watching blood run down my wrist again.

something about love, just not the way
I thought you cared. then something that
made me melt, I believed because it felt
so real, so true. later mention of my
stupid dream being more than a dream to you.

I don't know if I'm going crazy, or
what I should be thinking about this,
but I just hoped maybe writing it out
would keep me from losing my head.

Sleep is a great thing - believe me
when I say it. Especially when the love
of your life is the most unpredictable
paranoid monster you will ever know.

To be honest I don't remember much
other than the things you would do to
keep my blood inside, and that I'm more
mature than you were at this age, or something
closeish to that. I don't know anything anymore.

Your words took my breath away,
they stole all my words and now
this old computer is eating my words
up exactly the way you did when we
first met. So I'll say I am lost and leave
things there, hoping you will understand.

Baby, I know you can hear me,
I know you left me years ago,
but I cannot accept that you're
really gone so far for so long.

Since I was at your funeral
I saw the body that used to
belong to you all those years
before today. You're deep blue
eyes starred into mine for what
seemed like hours as tears the
color of all my emotions, being
alone to face the royal blue world.

Every night I go down to the
cyan cream river, I sit under
the midnight blue sky and wait
for you to come running down the
hill with your arms wide open so
we could hug one last time under
that faded azure moonlight.

Love, you left me and I don't
think you meant to,

I know because when
I'm at the river bank I can still
feel your arms around me and hear
the words, "you're my friend" and
"it'll be alright, Angel" drifting
through the simple airy space.

I just thought if you can hear me
the way I think you can, you should
know I still love our sapphire
memory book and I love you forever.
smile, where ever you are you are
my Sapphire Angel, without a doubt.

one after the other you sit
and you drink and drink trying
to drown your pathetic sorrows
away. I always found it funny
how you would be fine one moment
and smashed the very next.

It doesn't take a lot to
get you inebriated or lost
in the prison that is your mind
built by your own design and still
you get trapped. My god, how
much more stupid could you be?

They always say that you're
just human and I'm being too
******* you. They just don't
understand what it's like being
a kid watching brother **** himself.

You don't get what it's like
to be a child able to do nothing
when someone important is hurting
themself purposely night after
night just because daddy never gave
him things he asked for and mommy
was never home. I'm sorry, you don't.

At least when I grow up,
I'll be elegantly wasted unlike
you. I will be able to hold my
own and to know exactly when
I have gone far enough. Rather than
too far, the way you always do.

My heart goes out to you,
I hope you'll come back safe
again tonight. Though it does
no good, because any coming night
I know is going to be your last.

Why can't you be like mom,
like your friends? Why can't you
drink until you're numb instead
of dead? Why can't you be a lovely
intoxicated monster, because I can't
take the you that comes back acting
as if you're going to **** yourself.

Hunter, why can't you be like
us? Would it **** you to be
elegantly wasted instead of this?

We all know what its like to have our power go out...

What happens when our spirit goes out
or the fire in your heart? You don't
have a storm to wait for or anyone
to call for help.

A life has ended or a love was lost
and what can you do? Start a storm,
scream, rage, break away, do
anything to quench your pain...b
It's all going to be okay.

Every time it rains you can make it rain...

You, yes, You have the power to make it
unrain. The sun will come out again and
birds will sing, if only you gave reason,
that's up to you.

Life begins again and love is always there
you need to see it. Open your eyes,
smile, laugh, see your friends, do
something to feel a bit better.
It's all going to be okay.

Fires fade but the embers almost always stay.