They say it's the quiet ones
that are the real freaks
but i'm pretty normal
for me

and so..

if by freak they mean
living without regret
within the secrets i keep
and loving all
of the rainbow dreams
i dream
and indulging in
the delicious passions
i crave
and never saying sorry
for the weird ***
what's wrong with you?
does your mother know?
kind of life
i fully intend
to live
then yeah..
maybe they've got a point

and so..

by that reckoning..
i must be
the most unapologetic
and quietest freak
you're ever likely to meet

It isn't the question of all men being created equal, it is the matter of keeping all men and women and children as equals.  Let none of us raise above and ignore those that have fallen down.  Pull them up by hand and by heart and shoulder to shoulder and head to head and eye to eye.  Let no one see themselves as superior or inferior, let brother aid sister aid mother aid father aid stranger aid friend aid child aid infant aid animal aid flower aid tree aid air aid nature aid all.  We are of one people of one planet of one land of one ocean of one love connecting us all.  It isn't a matter of religion or prayers or god or gods or faith or skin or color or heritage or race, in the end we know not where we go but only where we have been.  It isn't about the destination but the voyage we've travled both outside and in.  And both our history and blood have been tainted by hate and war and greed but yesterday doesnt have to repeat.  Let us not continue down the same road of crimes that cause only suffering and grief.  Take the hand of your sister holding the hand of your father holding the hand of your brother holding the hand of the infant being held by the mother holding the hand of your child holding the hand of a friend holding the hand of a stranger and let the raise of equality spread across this one land of one world of one love and find in unity we stand shoulder to shoulder and eye to eye and soul to soul and finally see there is no real difference between us all.  Let us voyage forever forward through kindness towards love.

let me be free
to wander the starry skies
and to swim the fathomless deep

let me fly
feeling the heavens within my hair,
allowing my soul to be naked
soaking decadently
in the the ink of the nights sky

let me grow
with wanton abandon
breathing under water
tasting it's warm silk
luxuriating in it's depths

allow me to taste the earth
and the sun and the stars
let me fill my soul with it's wonder
making me whole

let me have the air that i need
and my ribs expand
let my hands be unshackled
as my blood flows with a rush

and i will belong
to you

holding me with only your eyes
i will remain
for all of my days
and be devoted
like a child that has found god
within their hands

Reading chapter two of Alice's Adventures in Wonderland.

Tis a bit ******* but fun and not at all in any seriousness.

https://soundcloud.com/rachael-435397529

you loved me like rain
forever falling

you cherished me
like the sun
as you watched me flourish
and then bloom
under your tender care

upon the gentle breeze
was your whispered devotion

and in that season
gathered
was a bountiful harvest
for where our love grew
will be forever autumn





https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hsCdlX-5UjE

This is for the father that does not consider to be a whole in his creations life.
This is for the mother who chooses to 'opt out' of being a giver of love to the fruit of her womb.
This is for the one who has chosen to be an absent parent..

This is for you...

WAKE. the. ****. UP!!

What are you doing?

What is wrong with you?

It seems to me you may not fully understand the ramifications that your chosen absence will play in the life of your child.

So I will spell it out it for you..

Your child, your gift, your delight, the one who was created from your very own dna, the one that you willingly gave life to and brought into this world...

will remember everything you have not done.

And they will carry this as a load upon their back for quite possibly most of their life.

Each will carry it differently, but carry the load they will. Some will carry it with forgiveness, some will carry with resolve, some will carry with the added weight of a heavy heart. Some will carry defiantly and will never truly forgive.

And no matter how they position the weight you give, by choosing to be absent, they will still carry that load...
because of you.

And you will continue to add weight to that load every day you choose to be absent from their life.

Each missed opportunity will be a pound of disappointment that your child will carry... for you.

Each broken promise will be a pebble.
Each late appointment will be a handful of sand.
Each missed birthday will be a tablespoon of gravel
to fill their pockets.

And every achievement they experience, that you have missed, will weigh upon their mind and their heart.

And because of this, throughout their life,
they will continually try to win your love.

You hear that...??
They will try. and. win. your. love...

Because... it is not given freely...
so they will try to win it.!!!
because, bottom line...
let's face it...

you're a selfish ****.

And because of your self centered behaviour, everything that they need, want and have to experience without you will be tainted with your chosen absence.

Every tear and heart break, every grazed knee, bad dream, smile, whisper, secret, colouring on the fridge door, every clay model, every needed word of advice, comfort, support and encouragement, every exam result, every moment of despair, loss, grief and first love...

each and every lost opportunity to say 'i miss you'
each and every unuttered 'i love you'
will be carefully, silently and invisibly weighed,
measured
and carried.

And i promise you this..
the weight you have placed upon them will be keenly felt  
when it is their time to fly.

This is not to say they will not fly, because they will,
and beautifully so..

And with wings that you did not help to fashion.

And, because of your chosen absence, your creation, your child, your very own delight will always carry the weight that you have placed upon them.

And the weight of your absence is so much heavier than you could possibly imagine.