I'm taking a little break from writing for a while
however, i will be trying my hand at storytelling.
And, in my usual fashion, it is quite a thing to behold haha!

And so, for my first attempt, i will be reading chapter one of
Alice in Wonderland..

I can say, with some confidence, it is not in anyway perfect
nor indeed professional. I would also like to point out that i do swear a little bit and do not, at any point, read like a coherent grown up.


  https://soundcloud.com/rachael-435397529/alice-in-wonderland

Sadness is when a child wishes their mother a happy father's day.

for years i have lived
within this
bubble
a bubble that i made
to keep me safe
keeps me safe
within
keeps me away
clear
transparent
like elasticated glass
i see the world
from within
and have felt safe
from within
it keeps the world
at arms length
safe and away
keeps me away
within
keeps me safe
but
i can't touch the outside
from within
my fingertips press the clear
press the transparent
press the glass
and it gives
under my touch
as my fingers enter
the world beyond
i have need
i have longing
i want
i want to go
beyond
to feel the outside
to touch
and breathe
and live
beyond
the within
to escape the
bubble
that i had created
so that i was free

sometimes you may only see the sun
from behind the clouds
and feel the rain fall
upon your hair ~
but you do not see
that the sunlight
only serves to shine
from within you
and how it makes the ebony
glisten so ~
you may feel
the bitter winds upon your skin
as it cuts you to the bone ~
whilst i know
you deserve to walk barefoot
in the breezy part of the day ~
you may wake
to feel ten feet under ground ~
and yet i truly believe
that we
each one of us
wish to ride upon your wings

I looked upon my world and i saw the brightness of the day.
A day where all things were crazy busy.
The washing billowed in the breeze.
The cats were milling.
The hallway needed hoovering ... again.
The children laughed with each other...
i know.. unheard of right !! :o)
And although the recycling still needs putting out
and the grass needs mowing .. still..

Contentment was mine.

I had looked upon my world and counted
every single blessing there was to be had.
There were so many that i ran out of both fingers and toes.
And i now know in my heart that i am happy.
I feel it.
Truly happy.

Whether i am destined to be alone for a while longer
or to meet with the one who smiles with me everyday
on the bus...
We could go out for coffee and feed the ducks maybe..
Haha you never know :o) it could happen..!

But.. i feel the contentment of my worlds simplicity.

And so, in my madly busy world i realised...
that after all this time of looking for happiness,
it was right here all along.

I had found it hidden in the the reality of the drudge to work.
The reality of mount washmore.
The reality of my tired bones at the end of a busy day.
The reality of my life, that i am truly grateful for.

I love love love the friends that i have been blessed with..
especially the ones who live in my phone <3
I love the kindness i find in the smile of a stranger.
The giving of hearts through desperate times.
The words of wisdom and of poetry
that i am privileged to read.
Pictures of sunshine and of flowers
from the dearest heart. <3
The gift of undeserved kindness..
that i had never felt before. <3

I look for it and i feel the love.. i feel it.

And even when the dog woofs at the postman fifty times.
And he leaves the gate open fifty one.
Even with the constant level of organised chaos
and cat hair..
Even with four hungry mouths
that own eight hollow legs.
Even when there is no coffee...
Yes, even then..

Even then...

I know it is the real life that i live that makes my heart sing
and gives brightness to my day.
And i am so very grateful for it.



https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RwUGSYDKUxU