No one knew
I hid the monsters
Silenced my screams
Let myself completely die when they mowed the lawn most times
So they wouldn't think of me as a ****
And pushed some of my peices of the broken glass I am under rugs
And some I tape together
To show them
A smile
And be able to try and hold my voice steady
As I mumble
"I'm okay"
I had to be okay
I had to be strong
Because strong in this society means looking together
Pretending to be okay
Walking on your broken legs and trying to push the pain away
Not telling them everything
Becoming vulnerable
If I told them
What went on
It would be like giving them a hammer
As a glass they didn't like
And hoping that they wouldn't go mad
Hoping they wouldn't break me anymore than I was already broken
I couldn't take the risk
Anyhow
No one decided to call ******* on my vague, iffy lies
"Yeah, I'm okay"
"Oh, why did I have to run to the bathroom as soon as I heard someone yell? That's nothing, I have a small blatter, that's all"
They didn't care enough
It was easy to decide
But now
Now I have some people
Yes, they're people
Not trees or stars
That ask me
"Do you promise?"
Ones that check in once in a while
Asking me to write anything
Just to show that I'm alive
Because they want me to be
Truly
They listen
To broken glass
So I show them my monsters
And they listen hard enough to hear my silent screams
To pick me up, **** and all
And say
"What a beautiful flower"
And tell me
That's what I am
I used to never share anything. Never open up. Hell the person I was closest with at school didn't even know I moved and my parents divorced until we lived in our new house for two weeks. I was too scared for people to know. Recently though, I've been getting good at it. Recently, people have been asking, caring, and I couldn't be more grateful. Most don't know still, don't wanna know, but that's okay. I have some extraordinary people that matter a lot more than them.