You can not love me
Though you say you can
You say you can pick up the pieces
You say you can fix what's broken
But you don't realize some pieces
Have been broken for years
Some parts are lost
The most irreplaceable parts
Have been missing for so long
I'm not even sure I could be happy
If somebody was able to fill those holes
Because I've learned to live without it
I've learned to smile When I'm sad
And especially when I hurt the most
So no you can't love me
Though you say you can

You love to write
He says in frustration
You do it so much
Just do it now
Like I want to spill my feelings
Like I want to let him in
Like you deserve to see
The words painted on my heart
But you don't
That's something you have to earn
And you truly haven't tried

I wish I could
I wish it was easier
But letting go
Of all the pieces you broke
All the pieces I loved so much
All the dreams I wanted
If only I could
Forget you
And take back my light

I hate you
You fill me with false hope
You make me drag on
Day after day
Month after month
You keep me going
With maybe tomorrow
And tomorrow's a new day
And it gets better wait for tomorrow
But you never come
You leave me crying waiting
Because supposedly it gets better
By tomorrow but mine never comes
So I just sit wait
And hating
Tomorrow

Looking back
I wish I could've seen the end
Wish I was sure I made the right decisions
Because leaving you
Was the worst decision of my life
But maybe I'm right
Maybe we weren't ment for eachother
Infact I know we weren't
I knew we wouldn't work
But there where so many words
I had wished I said

Your not who I wanted
Your not who I needed
But Your who came
When I was crying in the night
So I guess I will stay
But only for the next few days

I hate the word victim
It's like you are ignoring
All of the surviving a person has done
Like you are looking at the trauma
And saying you are a product of this
But I'm not
It's like you don't want to acknowledge
The fact that we did survive
And don't think your helping
When you say it's not my fault
And in the same breath ask me
why I didn't scream loud enough
Or ask for help
But you will never understand
What it's like to be so manipulated
That your scared to lose your abuser