As soon as he showed
No interest
In reading my poems
In learning who I was
I should have
Turned away

Instead,
I let him
Take many firsts
Which he didn't
Deserve

I didn't think...
But now I know,
I should have
Left him
Behind
Sooner.

l.v.s

Bitter waves lap at my feet
Whilst the tempest tugs at my hair
Pleading me to step forward

Leading me into the depths
That hold me captive
Left to scratch my way out
My last attempt at anything
Why didn't I expect to fail?

Finally, you come to see
How I am coping
But silence is your only reply.

You're too late.

l.v.s

This isn't a poem but I just had a thought, there's a few people out there that read my stuff and I've had some pretty intense conversations with people on poetry websites. I always see these places as a sanctuary where I can express myself openly, pour out my heart and soul for people to see. Normally I filter which things I show certain people but you guys are mostly all in the same boat. We open ourselves up and try to make things, including our pain, look as beautiful and delicate as we possibly can. It's an art that's extremely close to home for most of us. I'm glad these communities have been made because when I do message poets there's no small talk or *******. It jumps straight to the point and we share even deeper parts of ourselves and our experiences because this is a place where we've already taken off the masks and shared ourselves with others. It's spectacular, there's not many other places where you can be so comfortably yourself with others, because here you just need to take a moment to look at their work and see if they're in the same boat. It's a shortcut of sorts to the person's soul.

This ended up being much longer than I'd anticipated but it's something that I always hold close to my heart. I came on here to say that I hope everyone's doing okay and trying their best to find even the smallest ray of light each day, especially if they're having a hard time. You're all super brave for expressing yourselves on here, or if you're just doing it to be creative good on you too because you don't know how many people might connect with your words. Keep doing what you're doing and be kind to yourselves as well as other people.

Just a little message for you guys,
Leila :)

I can not help
That words flood out
Of me and splash
Onto others
Leaving behind
Tears of happiness

It comes naturally
To me

l.v.s

A bird floating
On murky water
Flutters for a moment
Only to find
A slice of plastic

She hasn't seen
Soft bread
Since her friends vanished
And her feathers matted

The lone swan
Bows her head.

l.v.s

There's much potential
For kindness
But it doesn't happen
As often as it should...

It's such a reserved
World that we live in.

l.v.s

Bitter waves lap at my feet
Pleading me to come closer

Just a few small steps
And I'd be swept away.

l.v.s

The tall red fence
Alluded to something beautiful
But if you take a glance
Through the iron gate
You'll see the
House is worn
With an overgrown yard

l.v.s

I got dragged for a mile
By the loss of both
A partner and a flat mate
And the financial issues
Which are just part
Of the left behind baggage

Luckily,
A girl copied the meow
Of my brother's cat Kitty
This made me smile
It only lasted a while
But it made me feel
Just a little bit giddy

l.v.s

Everyone has their story
I'm just trying to figure out
How mine goes

I just have to make sure
To keep moving forward
As the river of life flows

l.v.s
With some help from my cousin Matt

Cleaning out my closet
I found what I needed
To sew my life
Back
Together.

l.v.s

When things feel
Both so very wrong
And so very right
At the same time

It becomes
A fight
Within yourself.

l.v.s

Following the Sun's guidance,
I pick myself up
And fill the world
With light.

Today,
I will rise.

l.v.s

When you show
Your true self,
Silence will be
Your only reply.

l.v.s

Trapped under
A thin
Black spider

A bird
Carried it away
Far out of sight

Only to return
And hold me in
The warmth
Between
Its wing and breast

l.v.s

Free me, from this loneliness
sitting here in the dark
with nothing but emptiness in my heart
I ask myself, where have you gone?

Free me, for I am afraid
Perhaps you don't want to stay?
I require urgent aid
I'm locked in this cage

Free me, I am smothered in sorrow
Life is currently one huge obstacle  
I tell myself there's always tomorrow
You're bound to come back
Like a hound with a bone,
You can't resist

It's not that they
Can't accept you;

They want you
To fit in a box
That suits their
Little lives
And their
Minuscule minds.

l.v.s

You said I may as well
Be in jail
Because I spend
So long in my room.

I didn't go outside today
You said at least
Prisoners go outside
For fresh air once
A day.

Well sure,
I'll be a prisoner,
If you'd like.
I practically am.

This house is a prison
I'm monitored
Asked to work
Do this
Do that
If the things I do
Are "nothing" to you
Or not up to your standard
Of being worthy
Then I'm punished.

My room is my cell
It's my space
I've personalized it
I've made it mine
It feels safe
It's my choice
To spend time here.

But you still barge in
Even when the door's closed
You still demand things
You judge how I've made it
The way things look
The state its in
My own touches.
You prove it's not mine
By violating it.

Sure,
I could go outside.
But that's only
A larger
More diverse prison
Where I'm judged further
By the guards of society
I have to be alert
So I'm not abused
Or harassed
By fellow inmates.

Thanks for the metaphor,
Mother
But it doesn't matter.

I'm content
Being confined
In my cell.

l.v.s

He sculpted himself
Into my "perfect person"
And I loved it

Till I realized
It was an act

And I was nothing
But a toy
To play with.

l.v.s

It is not true,
don't believe it.

Your brain is being a *******,
put it in its place.

It's there to serve you,
not the other way around.

l.v.s

Say the word and I'll put away
the machine gun.

l.v.s

Darling, don't let him affect you.
Don't let him do that.

If you saw dirt on your shoe
You wouldn't
Spend the whole day
Staring at it.
You'd get a cloth,
Wipe it off and
Throw it away.

Throw
              Him
                        Away.

l.v.s

You can look forward
To the future
Just remember to
Place 'IF' in front
Of each thought/idea.

I prefer it that way.
Not just to avoid
Disappointment or pain
If things don't work
It also keeps us
On our toes.

We're aware that
Nothing's guaranteed
So we place more energy
Into appreciating the present.

Nor do we become
Too comfortable
Or lazy.

We continue working hard
To keep relationships
And moments the
Best they can possibly be
Because we know
It could be taken away
In an instant.

Focusing on the future
Can make us accept
A present we're
Not Satisfied with
Because it'll get "better"
In the future.
Which is a load of ****!

Focus on now,
Make now everything
It can possibly be
And you'll stop
Latching onto the future.

l.v.s

I hope we keep growing;
As individuals
In our lives
And, hopefully,
Together.

l.v.s

We all have different selves,
some of which we're yet to meet.

l.v.s

I've been told
That I make
Too many
Assumptions.

That I should
Ask before
I decide
Something's true.

But why would I?
I've tried
Only to have
Curiosity thrown
in my face
Or they've lied.

I'd rather trust myself
than gamble
with you.

l.v.s

There's nothing wrong
With focusing
On other things.

In fact,
It's a good thing.

I don't want
To become your life,
I want
To be a part of it.

I love talking to you
but do what needs
to be done first
and don't be afraid
to do other things you enjoy.

I wouldn't want
To feel like
A prison sentence.

l.v.s

A small flicker of light
In the night

To remind me
There's good in the world.

Not demanding
Attention

Or flooding me
With the knowledge.

Barely a blink
Just enough
To give hope
And
Make me think.

You're out of reach,
For now...

l.v.s

Quiet people
Don't stand out.
They're hard to notice.

You have to be looking
To find them;
It's a game
Of hide and seek.

When they open up
They're likely
To be very beautiful
They'll love the company
Because
They're used to
Being overlooked.

You're not alone,
I know how it feels.

l.vs

Get off my back, ok?
I've got heaps of homework
I've got a practice internal
which looks completely difficult
I've got to pack for a field trip
even though I don't have all the things, but I'll make do
All of which has to be completed in two days.

I've been exhausted,
Haven't been getting enough sleep
I'm not ready for the pressure of school
My mind isn't on that level yet
Woken up this morning,
Nagged to do lots of things
As if this pressure isn't enough already.

It's only 9:50AM,
My day's starting to go down hill,
It's turning to ****.
Can't you see that I'm stressed out?
Can't you see I've got enough on my plate?
Can't you see I'm fighting back tears?
Can't you see I'm trying to motivate myself to do everything else?
Are you trying to bring me to my breaking point?
It sure as hell feels like it!

It makes me want to scream,
Throw things,
Yell and hit,
I want to have a break from all this,
Get away until I calm down
Can everything just be easy?

But I'll square my shoulders and hold my head high,
You won't see me cry.
No one will see me cry.
I'm not going to lose it,
I won't make a mess.
I'll handle it
Do my work,
Prepare everything
And try be positive.
I just need my headphones,
That's all I need
To block everyone out
And get things done.

Please,
Stay off my back?
All I ask for is two days.
Two days
Without extra pressure,
Please?

l.v.s

Let's make a deal;
If we're providing support
And get second-hand emotions
We'll reassure the other
That we're a cloud.

We might be
soft and delicate,
But there's nothing wrong
with a little rain.

Eventually,
we'll collect our droplets
and float back
to the sun.

l.v.s

I could write a whole list of loves
But why would I
If you won't read it?

l.v.s

Dancing through the fog
The red specks
Hunt desperately
For anything
To set ablaze.

Will these fragile embers
Produce warmth
And comforting light?
Or will their search
Be in vain?

They'll either feed their hunger
Or slowly burn out
And take all hope
Of these unfortunate souls
Making it through the night.

l.v.s

To you, it might sound bland
In all honesty, it's rather grand!
Come see dead seabirds in the sand
Plane tickets are in high demand
For the "beautiful" country of New Zealand.

l.v.s

Love can be beautiful,
Yes, it can.

But love's also a drug,
And just like any addiction
It can cause more harm than good
Depending on the dosage
and the environment in which it's taken.

Some drugs give you a buzz when you're with friends,
Others leave you in the gutter all alone.
It depends on the strength,
The dosage
And who you're with.

Love can be beautiful
But it can also get out of control.

You always learn a lesson from it, don't you?
Love alone is harmless and magical,
Don't get me wrong.
But you also have to think of the situation...

l.v.s

I'm in control of my thoughts
But that doesn't mean
I have control of the reins.

You might be steering the horse
But you're not the one that decides
Whether it will listen,
If things will run smoothly
Or you'll be thrown off.

That's how my brain gets sometimes
It charges wherever it wants
And I have to hold on tight.

I'll pack everything up,
Crawl into bed
And latch on.

l.v.s

Some people slip,
When their clay gets out of shape
They accept what they're given
And set it in stone.

But you keep improving;
More water,
A faster or slower pace,
Viewing from different perspectives... etc.

You know there's a possibility
You refuse to give up
And be stuck the same way forever.

l.v.s

Frantically tug
Deconstruct
The tracks
Prevent progress
Of the most
Volatile transport.

l.v.s

Alienated shell
Open and bare
Worn lining
Clawed shreds
Impaired illusion
Adorned dull
Aquamarine shards

l.v.s

They speak of
An immaculate sky.
White and bland,
Lacking depth.

It's a blank canvas
I shan't deny,
Here we are reborn.

Within the breath of love,
Is where you are kept.

l.v.s


Apply vibrant colour to bare skin
The cleansing light
Through a hollow shell
Slipping between the cracks

Light and transcendent
You lay me with gentle grace
Submerged in ardent passion

Have your light consume
What resides inside

Purify all that I am,
Together set free.

z.w.b

I'd follow his footsteps with dread
No matter where they lead

I took my own path instead
To get out of my head

The man he once was
To me, now is dead.

l.v.s

May I take sandpaper
And use the rough edges
To scrape away
Each memory and thought
Till only lessons remain
From time spent with you

l.v.s

They say,
"Curiosity killed the cat"

I prefer to think:
It's the demand for fact
Which deprived the cat

l.v.s

Fresh wounds
Begin to fester
Tearing inward
Scars  deepen
Transported from flesh
To the soul of a victim,

Specific pain
Catered to the controller
An intimate bond of blood to emotion
Crimson Consumption
Pristine Flagellation
Perfect Punishment

With each step
My youth deteriorates
Enticing me deeper into the void
To which I am held captive

l.v.s and z.w.b

Inscribed upon silk
Is your raw humanity.

Lessons have taught
That such delicacies
Cannot be caught.

Unless uncovered
From the tomb
In which truth lies.

l.v.s

Slack cords tighten
As fingers curl
Each stroke
Producing another pitch

My personal instrument
Controlled by me alone

l.v.s

Gracious she stands
fragile and soft
to the touch

Upon inspection
the tattered edges,
the bruised core,
the ruined state
is clear

A stem traps her
chaining her down
fingers outstretched
upon a thorn I bleed

Might she shatter
might she wilt
scars may never fade.

I'm torn.

l.v.s

Plummeting down
Engulfed by flame

Pure white
Delicate and abundant

Now charred black
Brittle and sparse

Cradled in arms of patience
A treasure hidden from sight

Love stained tears multiply
He crumbles to the ground

Feathers of the fallen
Are carried in the breeze*

l.v.s