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Oct 2016 · 975
Old Trophy
Leila The Kiwi Oct 2016
What once ruled the mantel
Now shrivels beside outcasts

Rust crawls toward the heart
Shredding all relevance

Abandoned aspirations
Achievements left unrecognised

Images remain unfocused
Whilst consumed by encroaching demise

The tarnished skeleton
Unveils an aspect of reality.

A youthful audience bears witness
As coarse inscriptions sing
A corrosive chorus.
This describes an elderly person who has been abandoned in a rest home. They've refused to look at photos, achievements, memories, trophies... etc. because they remind them of when they were young and they only want to focus on how close they are to death. The person being described is in a similar situation to a trophy abandoned in a shed with paint tins, empty boxes... etc. It used to hold a lot of importance but now it's just another reject. The final stanza is a grandchild seeing what's become of their once loving grand parent.
Aug 2016 · 384
(My thoughts on...) Love
Leila The Kiwi Aug 2016
Love is a lot of things
It's your devotion to someone,
It's putting them before yourself
You couldn't bear
To see them hurt
Witnessing the smile spread
Across their face,
Knowing they're safe
And happy
Is enough.

Love isn't ***
Or physical contact.
You may want that,
But it's not important.

Love isn't just feeling good
Whenever they cross your mind
Or you're in their presence.

Love is taking away all;
The joy,
The intimacy,
The romance,
The kind words
And the light.
That is replaced;
Clutching blankets,
Hidden,
Violent shakes
Tear waterfalls...

Though things might not seem perfect
You still want,
You still care,
You still need.
You want them in your life
Even though it hurts,
Even if your throat is raw,
Your eyes burn.

You don't want to let go,
You can't.
Small voice whispers
"Remember the good,
Forget the bad,
Have hope."
Meanwhile,
Doubt shreds the heart.

You know it's love;
Everything hurts
But,
Thoughts
And memories,
Resurface smiles.

Pain of turning away
Maybe it's a rough patch,
Maybe things will get better,
Maybe...
It might hurt
It might shine
In the end,
Is it worth it?
Of course,
Love's worth the risk.

l.v.s
Jul 2016 · 2.0k
Love Me Tonight (explicit)
Leila The Kiwi Jul 2016
Feather light touch,
Your skin pressed against
the arch of my back,
Smooth curve of hips
Grasped tight,
Whispered moans
Escape lips of silk.

Oh darling,
Love me tonight.


l.v.s
Jul 2016 · 747
Orbit
Leila The Kiwi Jul 2016
You are the sun I orbit,
Ice and freezing temperatures
Flee from your touch;
I'm flooded with warmth.
As not to scorch
My fragile skin
You never slumber.

I rotate around you,
Though you're far
I remain here
Dependant on you.
You love
You care
From a distance.

Snow and icicles
Become
Blossoms and waterfalls.
A never ending cycle,
You healing the wounds
Inflicted where light is foreign.

You give life,
Without you, I'd be bare
And bone dry.
I'll orbit you
Till the end of time
Or till we're
Swallowed by black.
You're my sun,
I need you...

l.v.s
Jul 2016 · 484
Removal
Leila The Kiwi Jul 2016
You said your friend was joking,
I believed you.
It may seem stupid to other people
But it's not to me,
I always trusted you.

You said I could be with him,
It made you happy that I'd found someone better.
Even though you were jealous,
You only wanted
The best for me.

You wanted to be the same as before;
I was still your girl.
Only, I wasn't...
I am my own girl
And soon,
I'll be his.
It hurt you to hear that
But you understood
You wanted me to be with him.

You said you wanted to say good bye forever,
It may have brought tears
But I feel the same way.
Sliding our crowns
From our heads
We step towards each other,
Place the symbols of
Our devotion on the ground
And step away.

With no hesitation
I turn around,
And run straight into his open arms.
Burying my face
In the comfort of his chest.

Taking one last glance back
I lock eyes with you.
We share each final fragment of
Care,
Desire,
Love
And commitment
We have for one another.
With a slight twitch at the corners of your lips,
You look away.
It's official;
We'll never
See each other
Again.

l.v.s
Jul 2016 · 943
If I Hurt You
Leila The Kiwi Jul 2016
What if I lash out
When I'm exhausted
and say things I don't mean,
What if you believe me,
Would those words
Haunt your mind
When you doubt yourself,
When you doubt us?
Maybe, maybe not.
But if that does happen,
If I hurt you,
I'd hurt myself
Twice as hard.

l.v.s
Jun 2016 · 2.5k
Not Worth It (12w)
Leila The Kiwi Jun 2016
It's not worth
being that open
and trusting,
it's a death trap.

l.v.s
Jun 2016 · 1.1k
Can't Help Falling In Love
Leila The Kiwi Jun 2016
"Wise men say
Only fools rush in
But I can't help falling in love with you
Shall I stay
Would it be a sin
If I can't help falling in love with you" - Elvis


Rolling through the credits
Of a film,
My sleep-dazed mind
Snapped to full awareness
At the sound of this song.

I've been through it before,
Lept straight through that open door.
I know it's foolish,
I'm not that stupid.
Flowing into a new romance
Right after losing
My first love,
Right after experiencing
Heart break...
You must think I'm insane!
People may say:
"Watch that silly girl, skipping around without a care. Has she forgotten? She'll only hurt herself and that boy. She can't move on yet, it's too soon. Such a foolish girl"

Well, they can speak of me
As they wish;
Curse my name,
Throw it to the depths of Hell,
Be toxic,
Try to poison me.
So I'll run away from him,
Hide my tail between my legs
While I seek out shelter.

But I know one thing
And it's sealed in fact,
This I'm willing to shout:
I can't help falling in love with you!

l.v.s
Jun 2016 · 658
Consumed
Leila The Kiwi Jun 2016
I'm completely consumed...
My heart,
My mind,
Everything.
But it's not like before.

My heart's not consumed
By longing and emptiness.
It's consumed by:
The softness of his spirit
His smile
And my love for him.

My mind's not consumed
By poisonous snakes or howling winds.
It's consumed by:
His kind and supportive words,
The silly teasing jokes he makes
And the fact that I don't think
I should have these feelings.

My everything's not consumed
By missing my ex or feeling sorry for myself.
It's consumed by:
The boy who's helping me move on,
Who understands that I'm not ready for a relationship
And comforts me if times get hard.

I'm completely and utterly consumed...
Just so you know Ben,
You're the reason for the movement of this pen.

l.v.s
Jun 2016 · 631
Holding Your Hand
Leila The Kiwi Jun 2016
Small cottage,
Soothing fire burns within.
Tended to vegetable garden
In the backyard
Two small children
Scream with laughter
Fighting over a ball.
Inside sits a young woman
Waiting for her love to return.
Flipping through a photo album,
A smile plays at her lips
Memories play on queue.

To answer your question...
Holding your hand feels
Comforting and fills me with love.
It feels like home.

l.v.s
#home # love #waiting #cottage #warm #memories #welcome comfort
Jun 2016 · 540
Hell (9w)
Leila The Kiwi Jun 2016
I was locked in hell,
In two different worlds.*

l.v.s
May 2016 · 616
What Have I Done?
Leila The Kiwi May 2016
What have I done?
It's just my emotions,
Don't take it personally.

What have I done?
I've just been a sad girl lately,
Things have been hard.

What have I done?
I thought I was handling things well.
Turns out,
I haven't.
Everything was just hidden below the surface.

What have I done?
I crumbled,
You blamed yourself.

What have I done?
I guess,
I'm a loaded gun.

l.v.s
May 2016 · 2.3k
Petals (explicit)
Leila The Kiwi May 2016
I kneel before her
Smoldering heat
Coated in want
Hips rise
Thrash and squirm
An eager tongue
Darts forward

Mmmmm,
Her petals
Are my reward!

l.v.s
May 2016 · 421
Rose Bud
Leila The Kiwi May 2016
You must not -ever- forget,
Spring is just around the corner.


With Spring comes
Warmth,
Rain
And young rose buds.
Who open their shells
To bask beneath sunlight
And display their bright colours.


They are far from foolish.
When blistering wind and frost
Swallow the land,
They nestle their delicate petals
Within their shells
Placing trust
In their thorns
For protection.


But, come Spring;
They will flourish once again.
Having become far more vibrant,
Their fragrance sweeter
With magnified youth.


This youth I speak of,
Has no relation to age.
For these rose buds have been
Battered,
Bruised and
Scarred.
Age is not important.
This youth
Is seen in each newly gained
Spark of hope,
Shimmer of love
And strength
Received while buried beneath snow.


Tales are still told:
They have become the word of legend
During bitter winters.
No, my dear,
These tales aren't expressed through words.
They drift from the shriveled lips
Of the Wise Oak,
Who has been stripped bare
During Autumn,
As he whispers encouragement
To new generations of
Rose buds.
For he,
Witnessed the legendary roses
Battle then thrive,
Battle then thrive...
Year after year.
And he hopes
The tales
Will help these frightened
Rose buds survive.


Lets hope,
They won't forget:
Spring is just around the corner.

l.v.s
May 2016 · 807
Is it wrong?
Leila The Kiwi May 2016
Is it wrong,
That his best friend
-Who I'd never met-
Had to tell me?

Is it wrong,
That even though
He left me
For another,
I'm not the slightest bit angry?

Is it wrong,
That when other people
Speak horrible things about him,
It sends me into a rage?

Is it wrong,
That after he snuck away
Without a single good bye
Or thought of my well being,
I have an urge to protect him?

Is it wrong,
That he's cheated on me multiple times,
But I'm happy for him?

Is it wrong,
That my heart
Was stomped into the dirt,
Yet it left me
Feeling at peace?

I'll tell you what...

It sure as hell feels wrong,
Because I still care!
And I know for a fact,
That you don't.
Not anymore.

l.v.s
Leila The Kiwi May 2016
The aggressive wind,
Doesn't knock softly on the door
He doesn't check to see if I want company
No, he's not that considerate.

The aggressive wind,
Wants his presence to be known.
He tackles my house,
My fighters spirit
And every last ounce of joy
To the cold hard ground.
Leaving me no other choice,
But to claw and drag
My way out.

The aggressive wind,
Is paying a visit tonight
Spitting hail in his wake
My body starts to quake.

The aggressive wind,
Never comes alone,
He's always joined by his
Dearest friend.
And I'm willing to bet
That the ice is going to set in
On the once sacred grounds
Of my heart.

So, aggressive wind,
Come on in,
Slide off your jacket
And take a seat.
Make yourself comfortable,
Because it's going to be a long night!

l.v.s
May 2016 · 1.0k
Hidden Corners
Leila The Kiwi May 2016
It's in our darkest times;
Trapped inside the labyrinth
Of our minds

With the waves of sorrow
Clawing out
And flowing freely
Down the engraved canyons
Of our tired eyes

That we discover
The most beautiful
Hidden corners
Of our souls.

l.v.s
May 2016 · 378
Hunger
Leila The Kiwi May 2016
Maybe, you're afraid to love?
You say:
"Nothing good can ever come of it.
When the veil is removed,
All you're left with
Is an insatiable feeling of hunger.
Hunger
For warmth and their touch
Hunger
To see, just once more,
The care and desire in their eyes
When they gaze past your walls
To the soul within.
A growing
Relentless hunger
To feel
Wanted."

l.v.s
May 2016 · 1.5k
Gain
Leila The Kiwi May 2016
No matter how hard it hurts
Promise me
You'll never forget;
There's always
A little something to gain
From pain.

l.v.s
May 2016 · 1.6k
By My Side
Leila The Kiwi May 2016
Without you by my side,
This throne crumbles to ruin.

Without you by my side,
My crown gathers rust.

Without you by my side,
I'm no longer a queen.

Without you by my side,
I'm just another peasant.

Without you by my side,
I join the countless lost souls.

Without you by my side,
I'm worthless.

I no longer
Resemble
The woman
You love.
Unless,
You're by my side.

l.v.s
May 2016 · 1.2k
Avalanche
Leila The Kiwi May 2016
My love for you is like an avalanche
At first,
All seems gentle and harmless
Over time,
It gains momentum and swells
The unrestrained beast
Rumbles and growls

l.v.s
Apr 2016 · 1.1k
Wither
Leila The Kiwi Apr 2016
I was once told:
"You can trust me"
"I'm here to help"
And "I'm here for you"
My innocent mind believed each word.
You had me convinced.
Looking back,
I can't help but wince

Your job is done;
I'm coated in your venom.
So, away you slither,
Abandoning me a final time.
Quietly, I wither

I don't blame you.
After all,
Who would want to hold
A heart laced with mold?

l.v.s
Apr 2016 · 750
This Room
Leila The Kiwi Apr 2016
A soft caress of tears
The only source of comfort
In this hollow room
There's furniture
There's simple treasures
There's pictures on the wall
But none of it matters
Not at all

Where did everything go?
The laughter,
The warmth,
The companionship,
The love,
You.
Why aren't you here?
This room is bare
No one's near

Once again,
I'm left alone.
In this room

l.v.s
Apr 2016 · 609
Good bye Burnie (our dog)
Leila The Kiwi Apr 2016
I was planning to write something poetic and heart felt
But I'm far too tired,
I need some rest.

You were just over a year and a half old,
Still a pup.
But you bit someone two days ago,
It's not your fault.
You had a rough up bringing
Till you were taken away
From that man
And given to the SPCA.
Where you eventually met us,
Your new family.

You had trust issues.
Dogs,
Cat,
And any other animal were fine.
You were just afraid and defensive
When it came to other people.
There were only two others,
Apart from the three of us,
That you wouldn't
Bark at,
Growl at
Or jump at.

What'd he do to you?
No one knows,
I guess we'll never know.
Your brothers and sisters
Had to be put down for the same reason.
You were seen as dangerous dogs
Who could be a threat.
The man from dog control said you were just an accident waiting to happen.

But he didn't know you
Like we do.
He didn't see you being
Smacked in the face by our cat
(He can be mean sometimes)
And just walking off with a wagging tail.
He didn't see how excited you were when someone played with you,
He didn't see how mellow and relaxed you were
When one of us cuddled you or pulled you into our arms.
He didn't see anything.
All he saw was a dog protecting
His house,
His family,
The cats and people he loved
When there was
No sign of a threat.

Burnie, it's not your fault
That the man who
Previously owned you
Isolated you
And treated you and your siblings
In a bad way.
It's not your fault you were scarred for life.
It's ok,
Your brothers and sisters
Have their baby brother back now.

I saw you for who you truly were
And I loved you.
This just isn't fair...
Good bye Burnie.

l.v.s
It's been a sad day...
Apr 2016 · 540
happiness
Leila The Kiwi Apr 2016
I try my best
To make people feel good about themselves
You could say,
I'm trying to spread happiness like it's a disease
Hoping it will catch on
Then spread through the masses

Sadly a lot of people
As they grow older
Become immune to true happiness
That alone,
Is one of the saddest things to witness

Still,
I try my best

l.v.s
Apr 2016 · 1.2k
Open the Floodgates
Leila The Kiwi Apr 2016
Open the floodgates
You seem afraid to do so
You seem to believe
I'll be swept under
And taken from you forever
You said: "You already have enough to deal with"
But, I doubt you've considered,
That being locked out by you,
Is the leading cause of my pain

Open the floodgates
When I was left alone
I uncovered my strength
I learnt to get by on my own
If your words cut deep
If I must do so again
I'll heal myself
I'm not afraid to be pulled under
Not anymore

Open the floodgates
Though, your suffering may cause salt stains on my cheeks
Though, how you see yourself may crack my heart in two
Though, you may have sent others fleeing in fear
Though, it seemed you were only truly cared for by a few
I will not give in
I'll stand tall
I'll push through the currents
You won't see me fall
Unless I'm on my knees before you
Until your walls have crumbled and your heart is within my reach
I'll gather every ounce of strength
In order to make it
So I can pull all your broken pieces into my arms,
Pour the contents of my heart and soul into them
In an attempt to show
I care
In an attempt to show you
I'll always be here

Open the floodgates, my love
Look into my eyes as I swim through the force
Simply to cradle you in my arms
Know this, if I can't make it to the other side
I will die trying
I won't give up on you

Open the floodgates
Give me a chance

l.v.s
Apr 2016 · 1.2k
Unique
Leila The Kiwi Apr 2016
"In order to be irreplaceable,
One must be different"
-Coco Chanel

We may all feel the hunger to fit in
But why would you want to fit in, When you can be unique?

The courage to be yourself in a world full of sheep- in itself- is beautiful
And frankly, the only person you should try to impress, is yourself
At the end of the day who's always there for you?
That's right!
It's you!
Do you want those you love, those you spend the most time with, to remember you when you're gone?
To smile and laugh when they think about you?
Then, be unique
Remove the chains you've wrapped around your neck in order to be "normal"
Spread your wings and let this world see you
Some may be flooded by your boldness
They may become venomous, because they're too afraid to do it themselves
Do not give them the power to dampen your spirit
Hold your head high
Be proud in who you are
Because the rest of us, those who have freed ourselves?
We're waiting for you
And we want to wrap you in a blanket of warmth and kindness
When you're ready,
Come find us

We may all have the hunger to fit in
But why should we want to fit in,
When we can be unique?

l.v.s
Apr 2016 · 685
The Warm Sea
Leila The Kiwi Apr 2016
A thin sheet of ice borders the warm sea
You may ask:

"Logically speaking, wouldn't the ice melt away? The water would envelope the ice until, like the sea, it became warm. Your statement doesn't make sense"

I often ask myself that exact question
But, if there's a sudden cold snap and the mighty wind bites at the water,
Cooling it and allowing the ice to take hold
Why doesn't the warmth of the water fight to remain?
Shouldn't that large mass of water be able to swallow the ice before it's smothered and frozen?
If the water is so warm, surely it has that strength
Unfortunately, once the ice is joined by the vicious wind
That warm sea- which had created much joy and laughter, for those lucky enough to witness it- becomes overwhelmed and beaten into submission

Listen carefully, boy
When you gaze into the vast ocean of those eyes, into the very soul, of the woman you love
Maybe, just maybe
You'll realise that some things are more powerful than logic

l.v.s
When I wrote this I was in a writing mood but I wasn't sure what to write about. I decided I'd write about my eyes, which is what the first line is describing. The rest of the poem just flowed out and it's one of the few poems I've been completely happy with form the very beginning.
Apr 2016 · 663
Do You?
Leila The Kiwi Apr 2016
Some nights, do you lay in bed
Finding it hard to sleep
Battling with thoughts in your head?

No other choice but to witness old wounds reopen
Like a book you've read a thousand times
You know what's coming
Still, it catches you by surprise
Do you hope, wish and pray that someone was there to wipe your blurry eyes?
Even after all these years you recall each detail
Forced to relive your darkest fears

Some nights, do you lay in bed
Finding it hard to sleep
Battling with thoughts in your head?

Do you?

l.v.s

— The End —