This breathe and these lungs
Have been used to preach subjects I fully can't understand
Like existence, cats, and why yesterday feels like today
So I told a story about you
It reminded me of your nails
And the memories they held
Each time I try to write about you
my arthritis flares up
My lungs cringe
And my mind turns static
They say there are 5 steps of grieving
What about the 6th step?
The times where your body stops working
They never mentioned the part
Where you find her spirit in everything
The clouds began to shine your radiance
The wind smells like you
Tomorrow feels almost like home
We will never get the day you left back
I have been spending each moment
Elaborately searching for you everywhere
And I have found
You never left
My heart still speaks of your beauty
My laughter a sliver
These eyes glistening
To show the elation
You exhaled into my life
So don't let this be a poem about you
I am still unsure what that would look like
But for now, I wanted to say
I love you

I will not allow you to become a banned book
In an unknown library
Somewhere lost in my thoughts

I have read you over and over
Each time learning to not read the ending first
To use my book light during the day
For sake of not being afraid of commitment
Used dictionary definitions
For loving you doesn't always make sense
My dreams have become chapters
The ring on your finger
A ******
And the family we will someday have
The happy ending

You are my library
The words you speak my light
A leather bound promise of elation

I know it is not my place
Yet I read your work and cannot help but wonder
Can you see yourself the way I do
Not just a mess. A horrible person
With honey in their words
Acid on their tongue
Dreams of neverwhere dripping like leaky faucet lips
I cannot help but want to fix with a wrench

You are tonight's breeze
The only thing worth inhaling