Here's life for you and me,
In a Western Liberal Democracy,
We voted for politicians, in reality,
So we got politicians, quite literally,
We don't believe a word they say,
With media hype and fear campaigns,
Yes, sad, but true, for you and me,
We live in a Western Liberal Democracy,
Does such exist in reality?
We voted for politicians, Tweedledee,
or Tweedledummers, pollies for democracy!
Sarcasm, you really need me!

In Oz, we don't like political jokes,
Here, they all get elected, folks,
Pollies sell their souls for money,
Their salaries aren't even funny,
Then they get super to retire,
Better candidates we should hire,
Different from our oldies and veterans,
They're on measly financial plans,
Yes, that's why we don't like political jokes,
Here,  they all get elected, folks.

Pollyanna can do,
Sounds optimistic to you,
Idealism for me and you,
No  need to wake up blue,
Women are a capable crew,
Most stuff we're equal to,
Put on your positive thinking cap,
Pollyanna can do, that's that.

I wrote an ode like a song,
About a town called Poowong,
I wrote it in a song,
Then I went to Geelong,
I had egg fong in Poowong,
I knew a sheila in Geelong!

Are you lonely after a divorce?
Not as lonely as you were before,
Are you ever going to 'do it' again, mate?
Yes, if you get really desperate,
Shall you ever remarry, missing it?
Yes, if you are a total *******!!!
Post trauma, post divorce,
Disenfranchised, just like before!

Worm sliding at back of house,
Met, by chance, a tiny soft mouse,
"How's all that mating stuff?
Dating the one is enough,
Worms stood the test of time,
Power to all our slime!
Worm love keeps us forever young,
Hermadrophites make the best fun!"

Like Merlin, we graze
At thoughts limitless,
Stars, the moon, our muse,
Benign sould scribbling,
Keyboards inspired,
Or so it seems,
Faith doubts and believes,
Love's dreaming days,
Make our happy hearts,
Okay poets.

But she was so pretty in pink,
Does it mean she's ready to ****?
Don't such stereotypes stink?
Maybe she's not so pretty in pink......

Here is the primal male to keep,
Food, TV, ***, sport and sleep,
All this under the carpet we sweep,
Really no need for chicks to weep,
Our brains have more thoughts to keep,
That's why women need far more sleep,
Compared to our primal males we keep,
Food, TV, ***, sport, and sleep,
That's the way males are,
Definitely originate from Mars!

Imagine the zoo after dark,
As if there's a swinging primate park,
Yes, after visiting hours are gone,
It's primate party time, so long,
Imagine all our furry cousins,
Having a primate party love-in,
Imagine a party in primate park,
No humans in the zoo, after dark!

Here in parochial Melbourne town,
Football causes many a frown,
Folk say, "Who do ya barrack for?"
I think, "What do ya wanna know for?"
Then I say, "Right back at ya!
I barrack for Jesus and Mahatma!!"
Yes, let's barrack for our princes of Peace,
In our hearts, their .dear  souls to keep,
It might make our world a better place,
If we  all had a serene smiling face,
To barrack for Jesus and Mahatma,
"There you go, right back at ya!"

Should I procrastinate now?
I really don't know how,
Time to procrastinate later,
Time is our life manipulator,
Yes, I'll write this now out-of-dater,
Plenty of time to procrastinate later.

Procrastination is the thief
of time, words beyond belief,
I'll procrastinate later, eh,
Silly joke for today!

Are you a fan of fur friend liberation,
Across our great lucky nation?
If only we had intercommunication,
Between every species on Earth,
We'd understand each other's worth,
Do you believe in what we're taught,
That animals have no abstract thought?
Indeed, how do we know this?
Is it all a load of blip?
Do dogs pass into Puppy Heaven? I ask,
Believing it's for 'good boys', their task,
Their certain and sure hope of resurrection,
Somewhere with snacks and toys in Heaven,
Loving their owners just the same,
Abstract thoughts, is that the game?
True interspecies communication,
Dreaming on, in this lucky nation!

I only open my mouth, it seems,
To offend, by changing feet,
Born with foot in mouth disease,
Don't take any notice, please.

If Jesus is the question,
What is the question?
Is it, let's say,
Youth disaffection?
Kids need to be taught to say,
"Back off' to drugs and bullies these days,
Jesus as a forever friend,
To wisdom their lives to wend,
How can we reach more of them?
In this modern, digital age,
Introductions need to be made,
If an issue, is, indeed,
Youth disaffection,
Is Jesus the answer to this question?

I know how to party,
On Friday nights,
I have crocheting, you see,
A stash of yarn, and coffee,
I'd say that's quite a party,
Hope all the crafters agree!

If only we could reach the sky,
Into the Universe on high,
A faster than thought flight,
Earth quitting time,
The quest for humanity,
Reach for the sky, you'll  see!

I envisage a Planet Earth,
All multicultural, for what it's worth,
One human race, of café au lait,
Putting the boot into prejudice today,
No more disenchanted refugees,
Grass is always greener, if you please,
The shifting sands of humanity,
No more disenfranchised second class,
True equality of life at last,
I do dream big, you see,
One global race, free from bigotry.....

Bad news,
For all of you,
It's 2016 in Australia,
Multicultural success or failure?
A new culture of racism,
Paranoia driving a schism,
In our lucky country we stand
For equality, a concept grand,
Today, let's have no discrimination,
A day of Peace, across our nation,
Yes, it's 2016  in Australia,
Multicultural success or failure?

This is a quest for chicks of any age,
How to meet a decent bloke on life's stage,
Wouldn't have a clue, how to build a rapport,
With someone sincere, who is not a dorb,
We're all humans with feet of clay,
Guess  I won't meet one this way!

I was reading old Aristotle,
If a woman is not rational,
Find me a man who is.......
It's a bit of a fetish,
Blaming women for men's blip,
Who is a rational man?
Any known politician?
Any other human?
Media are the modern tribe,
Feeding us daily diatribes,
Who is really rational?
Don't ask me or Aristotle!!!!

An ode from a peaceful visionary.....
If Trump gets the Presidency,
He'll control nuclear weaponry,
Bombs for that reactionary,
Should we be nuking he?
All that negativity and misogyny,
Yes, let's nuke some reactionaries!
Imagine the peace there'd be,
There'd be nothing left on Earth, you see,
So much for democracy,
Let's nuke all those reactionaries!!!
But, hey, then we'd be the reactionaries!!!!!!

Reality is let loose,
Have fun in your caboose,
Shy Adams and Eves,
Taking off fig leaves.....
You invented all that,
All junior copy cats
No one ever grieves,
Taking off fig leaves.....
Hence you all sprang.
When oldies' bells rang,
Joy love receives,
Taking off fig leaves....
God nurtures this tide,
Humans have multiplied,
Under house eaves.
Taking off fig leaves!

Cavalcade of companies,
Underpaying salaries,
Lucky country indeed,
Not good news to read,
So much for our economy,
Workers' entitlements, prithee,
Underpayment of salaries,
A dose of reality......

My task is to write a reflection,
I ponder, what is worth my edification?
I shall reflect this day on---POPCORN!!!
Yes, Popcorn! Our pop culture it adorns,
Sweet caramel popcorn is digestive ****,
or do you like salted treats,
Popcorn, Popcorn, salted or sweet?
Ah, decisions, decisions, decisions,
A dither of popcorn reflection........

Yes, summer heat,
Not so neat,
Refreshments time,
Your pool or mine?
I wish I was at the sea,
But, cold lemonade for thee?
Ah, that's cold,
Lemonade's, like, old,
Like childhood memories,
it's the  refreshment for thee and me!

I chanced upon a note one day,
I looked askance, then looked again,
It said, "Do you want to join us today?"
The Mafia application form reads this way.....
"Whattsa you name?"
"Whattu say?"
"Spella dat again!"
"You gotta gun, you say?"
"You gotta shades today?"
"Whattsa car you drive this day?"
"Issa big one, black or grey?"
"You shoota someone, one day?"
"Free cement shoes, our way!"
"Congratulations, eh!
You joinna da Mafia today!"

I stand here, a plaster saint,
Somewhere else, I'd be a haint,
A ghost of a distant century,
But I'm a symbol of Christianity,
Or of another faith, you see,
People come to worship with me,
I present to them a gift of faith,
All who pray for blessed grace,
No sacred space is ever empty,
The divine is here with you and me,
We're all part of this mystery.............

If only we could all Skype Heaven,
Embrace our beloved in fields Elysian,
See peaceful light in perpetual visions,
Pray for people on Earth and in Heaven,
Each day a National Day of peace and happiness,
Whatever happens today, don't stress,
Whatever happens today, you'll manage,
Your daily mantra and an adage,
Planet Earth still turns, sun arises,
Yes, life does bring its surprises,
Let's pray to strengthen our faith,
For solutions for peaceful ways,
Peaceful days on Earth and Heaven,
If only we could  Skype to Earth, fields Elysian.

My name is Julie Chatterbox,
I do waste thoughts a lot,
I can perform my monologue,
My brain does a yap a lot,
All I have to say,
Is raise your coffee this way,
To stinking thinking, okay?
If you want an opinion, ask me,
I can indulge in repartee!

Retirement and the remote control,
This sounds like a whinge in an ode,
Retired men and remote controls,
Includes, "Who gave old men phones?"
Is this what 'golden years' meant?
Defensible violence to retired men?
You'll be getting good manners for tea,
And not much more from me!
Don't you go T-Rex on me!
I want a  turn on that remote control, please,
You've turned into  a sook and a toad,
My 'golden years' whinge in an ode.

In a museum of the future scene,
A retrospective of 2017,
What will it feature to be seen?
Lands of racism and hostilities,
Political puppets, cant evergreen,
Any good news for the future scene,
How can we change 2017?

I rewrote a song called, "Denim and Lace,'
Hope this brings a laugh to your face,
"Pyjamas and Fleece,
I look fat in everything,
And you are a fat old king,
Making me do everything,
Wearing P.J.'s and fleece!"
No hot speed dates to me,
I remove my bra at half past three,
No need to be a sook,
I'll curl up here and write a book,
"Wearing P.J.'s and fleece!'

Let's rewrite a poem for you,
No apologias to Byron 102,
Oh bowls of spew, Oh bowls of spew,
Stale weeties they wouldn't waste on you,'
Where once I cooked bacon and eggs,
For privileges don't even beg,
On your blackmail, I renege,
Oh bowls of spew, oh bowls of spew,
More than your family would waste on you,
No apologias to Byron 102......

Yes, bullying toughens you up, anyway,
Smile, rictus grins are okay,
I'll see this in writing at a G.P.,
You don't need to be so mean,
Cheap and snaky, inspiration!
Let's not hear it for manipulation,
So, bullying's toughened me up this way,
Smiles! Rictus grins are okay!

Ripples in a slow river, lazy,
Flowing down time for thee,
All the nostalgic memories,
Ghosts of the survivors, yes,
Living in our hearts to bless,
Then we'll all fade away into space,
Floating away in the ripples of grace.....

There once was a rogue rabbit,
Met a hoodie Paschal hermit,
She overcame all her fears,
Munched tail to ears, begone furry fake ***!

This is a verse for the grey nomad,
An archetypal older lad,
What? Bored with watching TV?
Why can't you travel without her or me?
So, you wish to travel, "Off the beaten track!"?
Camping, "Back to the basics!" Alas, alack!
Are you camping alone tonight?
Sooky! Older ladies have seen the light,
Indoor plumbing is all the go,
We wave rolling stones, "Bye!" no woe......

It's romance versus the future, chicks,
What sort of guy makes you click?
Is he a loveable kind of dude?
What makes him think he's right for you?
And what do you think about him?
Is it all about that wedding ring?
Is he really such a handsome prince?
Is it more than skin deep, thick?
It's romance versus the future, chicks,
What sort of guy makes you click?

Some Oz towns sound quite ill,
Yes, there is a town called Rooty Hill,
Where quims are  waiting for the quills,
And everyone forgot the pill,
Lots of babes in Rooty Hill,
Heaps of girls for boys to till,
Only in Oz, could there be Rooty Hill,
Guess what folks do in Rooty Hill...
Let's all raise a glass, like a pack of dills,
Yes, it's beer o'clock in Rooty Hill!!!!!!

I am a rotisserie chook,
The rotation has started to cook,
This is my Karma, I sook,
To be a rotisserie chook,
Then it's off to the consumption,
With no thought of liberation,
But lo, behold Foghorn Leghorn!
Fat guts and feathers he adorn,
He liberates the rotisserie,
Free ranging for thee and me!

Sad can permeate.
Grey, dank days create,
Time heals, does pass by,
Gloom sees end to each sigh,
We all need remedies,
Keep up happy smilies,
Each person can use,
New focus to choose,
Once we all wailed,
Again the assassins have failed,
You'll wake up in your skin,
Cheers! the best medicine!

National Sarcasm Society,
Sounds like you and me,
Here's some sarcasm for you,
Sarcasm--like I need you!

Beware! Trump or Hilary are going to win,
Scary! Should middle America hit the gin?
What does this imply for planet Earth?
Any different politicians for dessert?
Scary! Trump or Hilary are going to win!
Now, where did we hide all our gin?

Are you scared of ghosts?
Is one hiding under your toast?
What is that creaking sound?
Whoops, your poster just fell down!

SCHISMS.

I woke up with Lennon on my brain,
I read the news in the usual way,
Turbulence and schisms over isms,
Society's  deep divisive chasms,
Why are we all such lemmings?
Bigotry and phobias ever forming--
Imagine a world of informal religions,
Only peace and tolerance in our visions,
For churches, we revere the universe,
Star trekking our young deserve,
Imagine our brave new Planet Earth,
In a century's time, what would it be worth?
All children learning together beautifully,
None taught hatred or hostility,

Imagine no schisms over isms today,
I woke up with Lennon on my brain.

For grannies, there is a school,
With a variety of teaching tools,
Grannies can get up to lots of tricks,
Spoiling grandkids is their own magic,
They have a common enemy, you see,
Grannies, renowned in history,
They learn heaps in grannies' school,
With a variety of teaching tools!

I think of many things to say,
I think,'I love you" in any way,
Still in love with you today,
"You're there, here I stay,"
"I adore you," with respect,
Benign you are, I  reflect,
You're ever chosen, thoughts riot,
Lover, do keep it quiet!

So, you want a peaceful life,
Whether you're a husband or a wife,
Well, bite your tongue, don't react,
You, too, can play the doormat act,
This is the true secret of success,
Give all you meet a smile to bless!