Coming Home

The ghost are everywhere.
I see them under trees.
In gardens and ice cream parlors.
Going home after all the passing years
It is a haunted place
Yet it will always be home.
The small English town
Lichen covered stone everywhere.
Even the cobbled streets remain.
Shining wet in the ever present rain.
Between the faded
Old fashioned shops
On either side.
A church clock strikes three.
As children jump from
The school steps
Like a soul returning to heaven.
I see a boy with his scruffy dog.
They are happier than billionaires.
The dog reminds me of my boyhood pet.
A scruffy mongrel running happily
with an even scruffier boy.
It is only another ghost.
But I think it is me

Maybe a nearby star will
supernova
and build a giant black hole.
So powerful
the sun and moon
will be swallowed
into its depths.
So fast the earth will disappear.
At lightening speed.
perhaps then
I would think of you
for the very last time

  Tea Leaves

Saying goodbye is never painless.
But today closing up her old house.
Where I spent my childhood so long ago.
It is dragging me into the doldrums.
Each room full of her sweet life.
I find her books her souvenir box.
Locks of her children’s hair.
Christening medals.
I go into my boyhood bedroom
For the last time.
It still contains my magazines
and a book I read as a child.
The box in mom’s room is
full of her clothes.
Ready for the Goodwill.
Then I packed the last of the
old familiar dishes in the kichen.
Solid stoneware that carried
my sustenance for all my younger life.
In the back of the cupboard
Moms china cup and saucer
With English roses on it.
The one she used to
drink her morning
tea in all of her life.
On the rim a single tea leaf remained.
That had once touched her lips.
That was when the grief hit me
Like never before.

Bye Mom
I love you
Jude

Wrinkle d in sepia
By
Jude Kyrie

I know it was me
All my fault.
How I need to see you now
just once not to talk or hold you
just to see you alive
and beautiful.
Just for a moment that's all.

In my bedroom drawer
the old pictures that were us.
No longer in thier glass frame.
smashed in a fit of desolation.
Now a sad *** of history
under old birthday cards.

I lay them gently
on the table
Smoothing them.
As if I could
smooth the wrinkles
you left in my life

I know now that is for sure.
Why did no one ever tell me
when I was just a little girl.
That boys with china blue eyes
and long dark eyelashes.
That smell of cigarettes
taste like summer rain.
And whisper words like down.
Are the reasons
my pillow is so wet.
and my poems weep.

In the night the skies on fire
A billion stars in eternity's pyre.
I want to lie beneath their glow
To hear their voices far below.
I want to stay here for forever
For my glitterball friend's
Will leave me never.

In the isolated desolation of grey skies
There lies an artist palette of blues
and deep magenta reds
That await  to spill onto a lonely earth.

Deep inside her soul was blue.
inside his heart his was too.
They kept it hidden, out of view
All of their life they craved for blue.
then passed right by and never knew.

He had the desk
next to mine.
At primary school.
He was so sweet
I really liked him.
No much more than that.
Much more.

At high school
He carried my books
home from school
every day.
Even though
it was out of his way.

He was my date
At the graduation dance
We even decided
to go to the same college

It was there we broke
The heavy chains of friendship.
And he became
My one and only lover.

We married young
Our parents
were not surprised
They were expecting it.

Before I knew it
We had three kids.
Two girls and a boy.


September 10h 2001

He came home from the city
As usual he tossed burgers
On the barbeque.
And we got the kids to bed.

He poured a glass
of white wine.
We sat and chatted
And sent to bed at 10
He wanted to make love
I said not tonight
The kids had been terrors
all day.

The next morning
he left for work
With a quick kiss and a
see you later honey.

I got the kids off to school
And sat in front of the TV
With my morning coffee.
The towers were just turning
to ashes.
Just like my life
at that moment.
All I could think was
I wish I had made love
to him last night.

September 11 2015

The kids are all grown up now
My son looks just like him.
He would be so proud.
We lower our heads say
a prayer at ground zero.

I look up to the sky
And whisper
I love you honey
It was always you
Only you.

And he answered me
A beautiful giant rainbow
appeared over the grey skyline
Of New York
And I know it was for me.

It was so very long ago.
The world was full of hats.
In the spring the hat maker came.
She pinned her felts and silk
to my mother’s head.
Added feathers and flowers.
My mother would be beautiful
for the Easter parade.

I tried them on when she was out.
Until my head became too big.
One hat in each box
Representing one more Easter.

Then when the chemo took her hair
We sat outside of her bedroom
The hat lady came for the last time.
She left solemn and quiet
Her eyes cast to the floor.

We all went in to see her last creation
On Mom's head a beautiful
hat with flowers
and ostrich feathers.

Her head perfectly covered
Not a sign of her lost hair.
And that was the last time
I ever saw her smile

I have stopped writing love poems for you.
And please do not think this is a love poem.
Because I am finally over you at last.

I do not care to relive past moments of us.
Like when I saw you for the first time.
And the songs of angels rang in my heart.

I will never write a love poem for you again.
Like when we sheltered from the spring rain
Below a maple tree in muted olive greens
And the colour of its leaves
were the exact colour of your eyes.

I am finished with silly love poems
And I will never mention again
How I still stop and catch my breath
when I ihear a laugh
exactly like yours.
Or when
I see a woman from behind
And her hair is burnished gold
just like yours.

I am now quite over you.
I hardly ever think of you anymore.
Except perhaps in springtime.

But then

I should never think of springtime.
For that would surely
break my heart in two.

Dance me forever....
By
Jude Kyrie

*Dance me through love warm and tender
With glitter ball lights in your eyes
Dance me through all I’ll remember
in the glow of a million soft sighs

Dance me through children and laughter
in a place where true love never dies.
Dance me before and then after
as I drown in the pools of your eyes.

Dance with me every day of our lifetime.
Dance away all heartaches and pain.
When I am old and my eyes lose their bright shine.
Dance me until they shine once again

Little toy trains

*He loved the toy train set
More than Lego or anything else.
I would say what shall we do today sweetie?
He would shout
let's  play trains Mommy.
I made him a station and trees and tunnels.
Put sheep and cows watching the train go by.
The train set took over the playroom floor.
For his birthday I bought him a conductors
Uniform he would not take it off.

When the sickness came
I prayed to God to take me instead.
And leave my little boy here..
He answered my prayers
But he said No.
I guess that he needed a little
Boy in heaven to play trains with.

Now sometimes when I am dreaming
I see him again in the mist of dreamland.
He always is wearing his conductor's uniform.
I say Hi honey what shall we do today.
He whispers quietly
let's play trains Mommy.

The drinking had started again.
At first she locked the door at night.
And I slept in the car.
Then finally
she threw me out.
It was not her
I know it was my fault.
I know I was lost
More lost than hope.
More lost than my job.
I remember waking up in the
drunk tank
I lay in the stench of human despair.
She was on the other side of the bars.
So clean so beautiful so lovely.
I got a vision flash by my eyes
of making love to her
In our clean bed.
I felt ashamed
at what I had become.
I needed a shower
A shave but living rough
Is a hard way to choose.
She paid my bail and
we stood outside
on the concrete steps.
She lifted a lock of my hair
off my forehead gently.
I looked into her beautiful face.
I always loved you
she whispered
I still do.
I half mumbled back
I love you too.
Tears filled her eyes
You know
I lost our son as well.
I felt my own tears
Ready to flow again..
I turned away into the bright
morning sunlight
Seeking the signpost
for a town called Oblivion

In my deep strange world of dreams.
Perhaps I will find something of beauty.
A glimmer of hope that shines in the darkness.
Or a beautiful poem that holds my hand
as I bring it with me into the morning light.
Even a glimpse of who I once was
With trusting eyes and gentle beauty.
So very long ago before you declared war
Upon me
and I was left scarred and wounded

Guitars In The Night
By
Jude Kyrie

*In the distance
On this hot sultry summer night.
Someone is playing Spanish guitar.
Its notes are touching my soul.
Awakening old memories
That have been long
been lying dormant.

The breeze touches my hair
Salty spray from the ocean
Kissing my lips
as she once did.

In the distance.
On this hot sultry summer night
Someone is playing Spanish guitar
Each melody awakens hidden.
tears from long ago.

I see her dancing with me
Soft red lips touching mine.
Your softness pressed
against my chest.
Through my tears
I reach to touch your hair

In the distance
On this hot sultry summer night.
Someone is playing Spanish guitar
Each note now a knife wound.
And My heart is breaking.

The Phone Call

It was so nice seeing you again.
It brought back the memories
filling my heart with the music
you played when we were together.
I loved you so much then so very much
She said

I feel the tears forming in my eyes
Just waiting for their release.
The pain of the silence when
the phone call ends
and you will be gone back to him.

My head is filled with love songs
we always played music
Do you remember?
Romantic music wine and
the *******
it was so lovely
She said

Desolation fills my heart
I remember so well every moment
My heart now a vacant space since you left.
It will remain that way for a long time yet.
I see you making love to him that way
as I close my eyes.

We had something special
you and I you know
At times I could feel
your fingers touching my heart
allowing me to breathe
to beat and to feel
she said

I tell her I am doing just fine
But I must go.
And that my date was arriving shortly.
It was two lies
Neither was true

A gentle misty
rain fell all that night
But I hardly noticed
Through my tears.

I do not know her given name.
Everyone called her Misty
Perhaps because she floated unnoticed
in a misty ethereal calm .

He noticed her quiet countenance
and he controlled her every thought.
He was powerful strong controlling
Misty disappeared even further
into the vapor that was her.

She followed him like cargo
to be taken places.
Never to choose herself
When I looked into her ice blue eyes
seeing the sadness she held inside.
The need to be herself slowly
dying within her.

People would say of them
What does he see in her?
She’s so laid back and dreamy.
She has nothing to offer.
Just a flat personality.

Then one day Misty stood up
and she broke free from him.
Traveled to places she had only
seen in glossy
Brochures and magazines.
She had adventures in other places
that were not even in travel magazines.
Places she once thought
she would never ever go to.
Well!
Not on her own anyway.

I think  fell in love with her
the first time that I saw her.
She was beyond ordinary old me
of course.

She was way too young
and too much alive for me.
But she didn’t seem to mind.
She was dancing on a table in the bar
In her carefree way unaware of the crowd

We sat and drank wine together
Way too much wine.

Like standing in the path of a hurricane
I was helpless had no defenses
or anywhere to move.

We were really opposites
like the poles of magnets
we had no resistance
to the north-south attraction

I slammed into her like a train.
I think this was the most alive
I ever felt before or since.

Do lights that burn this brightly
always burn out so quickly?
Being older
I always thought I would go first.

Even now after all these years
I still dream of her smile.
She always knew
the perfect thing to say
when I was happy sad
or often broken.

How was it
she always made
me feel so young?

There have been other
imposters over the years.
I have acted out the practiced
movements of love with them.
But when the evening light faded
And I was alone in my bed.
It was always you honey.
You were the only one
who knew how to fix me.

Lilac Time

The old couple gazed out of their window.
Five grandchildren playing in the garden.
So noisy so happy so much
what they should be.
He slipped his arm about her waist
And whispered
do you remember the lilacs
So long ago so far away.
We were young and in love

I did not know I was happy back then.
Each day more chores to do
never enough money.
All our children like steps and stairs
the youngest newer than the springtime.

She nodded fondly
a mist covering her memory
It was their time a time of lilacs.

It was so long ago
when we sat on the old porch.
sipping hot coffee
in the early quiet spring  morning.

Our children still asleep in their beds.
On the table next to the coffee ***
a rolled newspaper full of war
and drama of the day, lay untouched.

I remember looking up at you then
Your beautiful hair
flowing in the morning breeze.
I saw you then my love
at that moment not as my wife
or mother to my children,
but as the woman
I could never get enough of
when we first met.

I thought how good your hair would feel
falling onto my bare chest in our bed.
If only I could have frozen that moment in time
put that feeling into a bottle
like a captured insect.

To open and breathe its fragrance,
again and again
through the fast passing years
To last me forever.

If you would have asked of me back  then,
my love are you happy?

There on the old porch with lilac’s
growing up its broken trellis
in wild  springtime abundance.
Beside the fragrant pathways
of a far off spring

I would have answered
yes my love.
Very happy,
so very happy.

Today the soft rain falls without end
the sadness of the world weeps inside its deluge.
The raindrops fall into the forget- me -nots
in a Paris Park the light from the moon
catches its glow inside the grieving tears.
a patch of snow white lily of the valley
stand by them like a hoard of Angels
waiting to carry souls to heaven.
For lost countrymen have fallen
in the wake of madmens anger.
The men and women of a joyful day
died in the path of uncaring hatred.
Today the rain must fall without end
as the tears of Angels grieve in sorrow
But Tomorrow is a new day
The sun will shine the spirits of the just
will rise and stand *****.
For the city of lights and love will recover
and find its heartbeat once more.
And young lovers will kiss
in the shadows of it tower again.
And the defiance to those
who hide like rats in a sewer
will triple  in its resolve

They walked on the snow covered city sidewalk
an old couple slowly gaited and unsure of their foothold.
Age had taken its toll
but the care for each other was unmistakable.

He stopped under the old streetlamp
she stopped and looked
into his kindly old face.
Holding her gently as always.
Looking into her grey eyes
still beautiful he thought
untouched by the ravages of time.

Do you remember? my love.
You smiled at me here so long ago.
so very long ago under this very lamp.
Her face lightened a smile flickered
He had always been romantic.
“yes, my darling I remember”.

The years fell away as leaves in the fall
and the icy world melted just for a moment.
In their moment of warmth,
he pulled her close to him.
Her body no longer old and frail
He felt the great woman inside her
the one he had loved forever.

I think of you in my dreams
join me in them, my love.
just for a moment.

It is forty-five years ago
You are wearing a gay printed summer dress
holding a single white rose
that I brought for you.

The music in the café plays a waltz.
It swells and halts
and elegant ladies
sit in red gilded chairs sipping coffee.

The summer breeze
of love blows into this room.
Your smile again enraptures my heart.
Your eyes darken as they find mine,
filling me with as yet unfulfilled promises.

We are drowning in the melody about us
the music takes our hearts and
shines them like the sunlight.
Just the single pure white rose
cupped in your hands.

She smiled at the memory.
Her visions sharing his
even after this long lifetime together.

"It is strange how one day
and a single white rose
can make lifetime lovers
from just friends."
she whispered.

Patsy Sings That’s My Desire One More Time

A Story Poem
From
Jude Kyrie

The old place looks just the same, honey.
Just a rickety old bar by the dunes.
The Neon lights still spluttering in the night.
Its lost in time or perhaps more likely I am.
God how many times did we come here for
the shrimp basket and a couple of ice cold beers.

You were the most handsome boy in the class honey
I set my heart on you
the first time I saw you at the college.
Do you remember dancing so long ago?
You would hit the Wurlitzer with ten cents back then.
And Patsy would sing to us as we danced on the
small square of the parquetdance floor.

God, I miss you honey
I am still mad at you for dying on me.
The years have travelled by since you left.
There has been other imposters honey
I danced the choreographed
movements of love with them.

But when I was alone in my room in the dark
It was always you love
Only you knew the needs of me.

Here I am again the beer is ice cold
I drop a quarter into the Wurlitzer
Hit B17 and Patsy croons
That’s My Desire.

A couple of ghosts are dancing
But they might just be us, darlin

When he lay beside me
in the velvet ink of nighttime poetry.
I could hear the peaceful
ripples of lazy
mountain streams
or the cry of a dolphin
far away in his guiding
light of the deep sea.
Even his dreams
sparkled with sunbeams
that danced upon wavelet
of calm blue oceans.
His breath of sleep
sang lullabies from
a dreamy island.
And when he touched
me with his fingertips
it spoke in a language
that needed no words.
As he swam in the
deep waters of the
Piscean seas.
He held my hand
as we explored
the magical realm
of his gentle kingdom
And we travelled to morning
In synchronous grace.
Like dolphins that guide
lost sailors home
in front of their ships.

The sad ending of a love story

They were at that moment of last goodbye.
All day She had dreaded
the movement of the clock.
But she would not show him her sadness.
Tears was not the way for them to say goodbye.
They hugged closely it was so comforting
like always.
Tears welled in her eyes
but she fought them back.
The embrace was prolonged
far too long
for people out of love she thought.
Then as she gazed into his beautiful eyes.
She saw the grey flecks that had melted
her defenses so many times.
They talked endlessly
like new lovers almost as if
the ashes of their love
had raised into flame
and then caught fire once more.
She knew he could see her pain
as they gazed into each others eyes
for the very last time.
Neither one of them wishing to be
the first to pull away.
Then she summoned all of
her inner strength.
And turned softly to walk away.
She could hear the click of his
footsteps on the sidewalk.
her strength was fading
and she turned to see him leaving her.
She almost called out his name
to bring him back.
But the lump in her throat
allowed no sound.
She knew he would not turn around.
This was her last goodbye
and he took it with him
as easily as he took her love.
But he had also taken from her
the biggest piece
of her heart

She stood facing
the fading sunlight.
High on a windy hill
so beautiful and serene.
She told me
she was a fallen angel.
And her wings
had been taken away.
She said she would
teach me how to fly one day.
high over the thermals
with mountain tops below.
It was a sad
yet beautiful untruth.
She held out her arms
and enfolded me in them.
The beautiful fallen angel
with the sunlit hair
and eyes as blue
as a summer sky.
the only one
who can make
my lonely heart sing.

4am

Tonight the light of a tender moon
Blooms like stardust in my bedroom.

I think of happy people
not people like me.
They are lay under silk sheets
In a sleeping embrace.
Her softness comforts him
Even in his dreams he feels her.

The soft breathing
of their sleeping children
makes the night
even more tender.

In the waking morning
Their children will go to school.
She will kiss her husband
With a have a good day honey.
And the world is all
as it should be.

The dream fades
It 4am
And I am lay here
sleepless in my bed.

Thinking about
a beautiful woman.
That I should have
stopped loving
a very long time ago.

Sand in the hand
By
Jude kyrie

I learned as a young boy
that when I held a handful
of dry sand on the beach.
The harder I held it.
The quicker It slipped
from my grip.

I think that’s
the reason my love
that I always
hold your hand so softly
and will never ever
grip tightly

Say something nice to me
she said.
Like you used to when
we first got married.

He could see she was serious
And was quiet in thought
for a full minute.

Then he said to her softly.
Do you remember my love
When we were house hunting
For our first  home.
We looked at a hundred places.
Just about ready to give it all up.
And we found this place

We both cried out together
I love this place
It is me
I could live here forever.

She looked at him quizzically
Expecting an explanation.

Well he whispered
That's how I felt
When you let me
walk into your heart.

The Night Wind

*In the night the shutters roll
In the winds I hear her soul
Wailing winds as black as coal
The night winds cry as church bells toll.

In the night the driving rain
Tapping on my window pane
Calling me to feel the pain
The night winds weep for me again

In the night the hooting  owl
In skeleton trees the night Winds howl.
I hear her voice all though the night
The night Wind blows until morning light.

The moonlight spills
it's silvered milk
In pools outside my window.
I play the piano in its ambiance
It is her favorite piece
Chopins moonlight sonata.
She promised me
a house full of forevers.
But the jelous gods only smiled.
She has gone now to an illuminated
Place where darkness and pain
do not exist.
I touch the keys as softly
as I once touched her skin
The beautiful melody
floats upwards.
She is behind me now
touching my hair
As I play for her
just like always.
I cannot stop playing
or she will melt
Into the velvet night.
The hours pass unnoticed
and the night is broken
by streams if a golden dawn.
The. Last notes of the melody
Rise above the clouds.
And I know in some far off
world her fingers are spread
on a window
and my music
Is playing in her heart.

A few feet from my cottage perimeter.
A country road curves and bends.
Full of dangers fast cars motorcycles
Tractors pass by us sometimes
Way to fast .
Almost hidden in the hedgerow
My little white highland terrier
Not much bigger than a fiurrball
Her Scottish tarten collar
A proud symbol of her origins.
The silver medal with Francis the
Saint of all animals glinting
In the sunlight so he can see
Her clearly through heavens mist.
My heart wants to bring her in the house.
To keep her from all the dangers.
But I know she has the spirit of the wolf
Inside her chest and needs her freedoms.
Like all good animals.
And i must allow her to be herself
Even if she finds danger.
And breathe a sigh of relief
When she patters into the kitchen
And lapses from her water bowl.
And I know how much.
I Would grieve
If I lost this little dog
That I love far too much.

you were the one for me.
You saw the confusions
Hiding in my heart and
Took me to visit yours.

We made love and
you showed me the
Moon and stars falling
like beautiful rains from
.the summer skies.

You removed the fences
that had kept me
In my childhood.
Showed me the planets
Untouched and full
of possibilities.

Should I never
find this intensity
And passion in the
lovers yet to come.

I shall know this.
I have made love.
And have seen the
Moon stars falling to earth
on a spangled summer night.

In the skeleton forest
The white wolf prowls.
With eyes as cold and blue
as the winters skies.
The drought of the spirits
Steals our strength.
The power of the roaring Buffalo
on the mighty plains is silenced.
Only the death throes of our time
Leaves echoes in the trees.
Hear my song
it is from the times past.
Smell the smoke of the pipe.
Hear the stories of great chiefs.
Lie in thetipi of blessed memory.
Kiss the bride of your shared blood.
Deliver the children
that will be our might.
Put the spirit of lost thoughts
Back into the white man's bottle.
Arise and be as we are
As we were
The great nation of the tribe.

It was summer
that long ago dream filled day
When we walked
by the shoreline of a lazy sea.
The gulls cawed from above us as if
To celebrate our union
even they could recognise love.
I remember the slightness of you
Your summer skirts
blowing about your legs.
Your  hair a haze of auburn freedom,
I know it was at that moment
we became the only
two inhabitants of our own island.
the sea sending dancing wavelets
onto our bare feet.
Showing us we were now marooned
on this
Island that was to be
where our lives would
be spent until our our last breaths.
Was I so infatuated by by you back then
I know i offered you my breath
My blood my heart anything.
I remember your eyes telling me
Just give me your  heart my love.
So i tore it from my body and
Held out my hand
And my heart was in it,

At the beginning of time
The moon looked upon the earth.
And it smiled at its beauty.
There was no ending.
Only beginnings.
It’s colors glowed
in the hues of angels.
The only red
was in the night sky.
No blood had ever spilled.
Only the future lay ahead
In its endless bounty.
In the beginning of time
When peace abounded.
And no moon and star
had ever shed a single tear.

That night the moonlight
Poured through the bedroom window
Like a pail of spilled milk.
The two lovers bathed in its sweetness.
And their hearts became alive.

Soothing in its touch on their skin
The moon whispered tenderness
As it had done since time began.
It’s lights danced upon the floor
And sent joy into their hearts.
The silvered light washed away
All want and lust
Replacing it with gentleness

That night the moonlight
Poured through the bedroom window
Like a pail of spilled milk.
The two lovers bathed in its sweetness.
And their hearts became alive.

The lovers moon has died.
It will only return
When my heart finds romance.
When the southerly winds of fate
Blow passion into my heart.
When unbridled joy dances
Like sprites in its silvered glow.
The lovers moon has died
But it will come back
When the heat of my passion
Ignites it’s fires once more.

Nightfall brings its burdens.
Large packages of regrets
Sitting by my bed
wailing like banshees.
They call my name
all through the night.
Rest is but a distant dream now.
I see her in the moonlights bloom.
Beautiful and poised her half  smile
touching the edges of her mouth.
I respond as usual to her figure
So soft and alluring so much desire.
Reaching for her from half sleep
I hear myself begging
for her to come to me.
Accepting all the blame
It was me. always me, only me.
She is clearer now I can the
color of her bright blue eyes.
Don’t go
I say please God
do not go.
But the clouds fade the moon's glow.
In the darkness
she disappears once more
And all that is left of her
is my wailing of regret.

We have drifted to a place beyond passion
Or sentimentality it is an oasis where
We drink from pools of longing and contentment.
Far away from the arid emotions of an uncaring earth.

Let me gift to you the gardens of fragrant flowers
That proliferate this magical sainted world.
Let me bury my heart beneath the snows.
Awaiting a sunlit springtime
Where it will bloom only for you.

Hold me, my love, let me shield you
from the rains of sorrow.
Take my summer light and find your way
In the icy darkness of winters wrath.

Carve our epitaphs in the stones.
That have survived the ravages of lost eons.
Write of our love of our contentment
and our passions
let our story stay here forever
so  that it will tell us to
others who take this perilous journey
In time immortal that waits for them.

We were so young back then.
Seventeen or eighteen maybe.
We got to be more than friends
Soldiers get closer than wives.
In a jungle a million miles from home.

We exchanged letters
to give to our girls back home.
In case---well you know
Just in case.
Even going to sleep at night
We would say I love you, man.
Then wait for the response
I love you too man.

The attack had no warning
Bullets flying everywhere
The clearing a blazing
light show of tracer lights.
Guys fell all around me.
Airpower cleared them away.

I looked for Joe he was hit badly.
I held him in my arms
like a baby as he left us.
His last words were
I love you, man.
The last words he heard
were from me.
Not as much as I love you, man.

I was hit and bleeding
But I did not hurt with the shock.
Six months later
I went home to the USA.
I drove my old car to west Virginia.
And found the old trailer park.
I knocked on the door of a small trailer.
And his beautiful girl answered it.
She was holding a baby boy.

I passed the unopened letter to her
As tears filled her eyes.
I lied and said
the blood on it was mine.

She passed the little guy to me
To hold him as she read it.
I kissed his tiny forehead
gently and I said
See Buddy
you’re not dead at all
I love you, man.

In the distance
far far away a baby cried.
The day was cool and blue
Peacefully skies promised
A room full of forevers.
The babel towers
Of the trade centers
Stood in pristine majesty.
In the skyline of new York.
A circle of seagulls
Soared on a thermal
High above the Hudson River.
Then the planes came
From beyond where seagulls can fly
within their cockpits
Hate stuffed itself inside.
The noise of the engines
Became a cacophony.
Humans looked up
to see the towers crumble.
Man's creations fell in moments.
Death and destruction
Crashed to the ground
In burning grey ashes.
Then silence.
Only silence .
in the distance
Far far away a baby cried.

The moonless night
is as deep as any ocean.
Only a distant lonely star and I.
It sends it's strands of pulsing light
Far from me in countless miles.
But they land in my eyes
Sparkle by sparkle.
It needs to be seen as much
as I need to be noticed.
The dark is too dark to be alone.
The moonless night is too deep.
We are friends this star and I
We have a common bond.
The silence that surrounds it
also surrounds me.
I must be more like this star
I must shine my light
On a distant uncaring world.
And find that one who is gazing
upwards as I am
Waiting  to catch
my light in her eyes.

Sanguine in greens

The rain is a fine mist.
Behind it the hall of mirrors
distorted woodlands are olive green.
In the breaking sky a ray of sunlight
shines upon the tree tops of the forest.
Bringing a salad bowl cornucopia
of gentle greens.
all within a heartbeat
my spirits are warmed and joyful.
Now the parched dry earth
tired of the summer drought.
Drinks it's fill
And the plant life reaches upwards
to thank the heavens.
Greens fill up my senses
all greens
only greens.
I teach up and touch
the branch of a cherry tree
it's blossoms cascade upon me
with the raindrops.
in a fragrent hallelujah to nature.
I see my life ahead
the barren wasteland
of the unknown
is refreshed
in soft delicate greens.

England 1942

The war was endless she thought it would be over in six weeks when it was declared.
now three years later she found herself in this airfield crowded with young fighter pilots flying Spitfires and the bomber crews flying the stalwart Lancaster bombers.

She was twenty eight now getting to that  age of being called a spinster of the parish. The young airmen were interested in her but really only for one thing.
She worked in the photography department of the RAF and developed pictures taken by the recon airmen of France and Germany and Holland .
Recently an American had joined her in the darkroom.
He was a big man and  had a crooked smile and big hands he lay on the belly of the bomber plane taking pictures he laughed and said he never fired a gun in his life.
And that he had no beef with Germans he just fired his camera at them.
He liked to develop his own pictures and they worked alongside each other in the darkroom all though the war.
She got used to his crooked smile and big hands. He got used to her being there.
The war finally ended and he went back to the States. Where he opened a small photography store and built a darkroom with his own hands.
When it was finished he returned to England on a ***** steamer to save money. He knocked on the ladies door that had worked with him in the darkroom.
She answered and he asked her for her hand in marraige.
She accepted his proposal and they sailed back to new York.
When she explored the photography shop she found the darkroom.
On it was pinned a note in his nice neat handwriting.
It said I fell in love with you in the dark my love.
But I want you spend the rest of of your life following the light with me.
She was to be my grandma and he was my grandfather.

My father was born a year later
he had a crooked smile and big hands with a love of photography.
His specaility light and shadow.
I was born much later and did not share the family love of photography and was let off by God with only a crooked smile no big hands.
Instead I used to get into trouble at school for writing poems in the margins of my exercise books.
Grandma passed away a little while ago
i was given the task of clearing her personal items from the house.
In her memory box I found the note
in Grandfathers hand that he pinned on the door
of his darkroom so long ago.
It moved me to write this story.

So Go follow the light Grandma
Look for a big man
with a crooked smile and big hands
Hes waiting for you.

The words are hanging from my quill
And fall on the paper white.
They cry and weep and can’t stay still.
Falling all through the night.

I no longer exist they are all I can be.
As the candle burns it’s light.
The inks blue veins takes the blood. From me.
In every poem I write.

One day my lonely heart will stop
With no more poetry
The quill will dry the ink will clot
And it will be the end of me.

I need to return to the sea once more.
To the place where all life begins.
To taste the salt on my face once more
And find me new origins.

I need to return to the sea once more.
And change the thing that I am.
To drink the primeval soup again.
To make me renewed as a man

I need to return to the sea once more.
And let it’s salt purify all my sin.
To start again with my soul in grace
To find a new life for me to begin.

Time​ ​creeps​ ​by​ ​in​ ​darkness
Silently​ ​like​ ​a​ ​cat​ ​on​ ​the​ ​prowl.
All​ ​i​ ​see​ ​now​ ​after​ ​its​ ​voracious
​ ​appetite​ ​for​ ​life​ ​are​ ​​ ​ghost.
Lichen​ ​covered​ ​houses
From​ ​the​ ​burnt​ ​ashes​ ​of​ ​long​ ​ago.
School​ ​steps​ ​in​ ​a​ ​small​ ​village.
A​ ​boy​ ​jumping​ ​out​ ​to​ ​freedom
for​ ​the​ ​holidays​ ​like​ ​a​ ​soul
Jumping​ ​back​ ​to​ ​heaven..
I​ ​see​ ​another​ ​ghost  
a​ ​scruffy​ ​little​ ​boy
Running​ ​free​ ​with​ ​an  
even​ ​scruffier​ ​little​ ​dog.
But​ ​I​ ​think​ ​it​ ​is​ ​me

Borne On The Rain

*The​ ​summer​ ​rain​ ​has​ ​adopted​ ​me
I​ ​am​ ​now​ ​its​ ​son​ ​it​ ​is​ ​my​ ​mother.
I​ ​melt​ ​into​ ​the​ ​rainfall​ ​with​ ​my​ ​heart
Its​ ​beating​ ​pours​ ​tears
​ ​of​ ​rain​ ​through​ ​my​ ​body.
I​ ​sit​ ​full​ ​with the ​purest​ ​rain.
Awaiting​ ​the​ ​coming​ ​storm.
You​ ​will​ ​find​ ​me​ ​in​ ​the​ ​hedgerow
In​ ​the​ ​valley​ ​in​ ​the​ ​meadow.
I​ ​will​ ​glisten​ ​like​ ​diamonds
in​ ​the​ ​rays​ ​of​ ​sunlight
that​ ​fall​ ​from​ ​broken​ ​skies.
Thunder​ ​calls​ ​my​ ​raindrops
The​ ​lightning​ ​calls​ ​to​ ​my​ ​heart.
For​ ​I​ ​am​ ​one​ ​with​ ​the​ ​elements
I​ ​am​ ​borne​ ​of​ ​the​ ​rain

​ ​I​ ​spent​ ​the​ ​day​ ​with​ ​God​ ​today.
He​ ​gave​ ​me​ ​a​ ​warm​ ​smile
from​ ​his​ ​beautiful​ ​rising​ ​sun
later​ ​in​ ​a​ ​beautiful​ ​pristine​ ​lake
he​ ​humbly​ ​washed​ ​my​ ​sins​ ​away
in​ ​waters​ ​so​ ​pure​ ​and​ ​sweet.

We​ ​saw​ ​two​ ​of​ ​his​ ​white​ ​doves
In​ ​the​ ​woodlands.
He​ ​told​ ​me​ ​they​ ​were​ ​his​ ​favorite​ ​birds
Because​ ​they​ ​left​ ​the​ ​multitudes
Of​ ​their​ ​flocks​ ​to​ ​be​ ​peaceful​ ​symbols  
of​ ​love​ ​and​ ​devotion
​ ​mating​ ​with​ ​each​ ​other​ ​for​ ​life.

The​ ​day​ ​turned​ ​dark​ ​and​ ​grey
The​ ​torrents​ ​of​ ​rain​ ​fell​ ​in​ ​a​ ​deluge.
But​ ​all​ ​of​ ​a​ ​sudden  
he​ ​sent​ ​the​ ​warm​ ​sunlight
​ ​streaming​ ​in​ ​bright​ ​rays
​ ​through​ ​the​ ​broken​ ​clouds.
Reminding​ ​me​ ​that​ ​​ ​he​ ​always  
had​ ​bright​ ​lights
For​ ​even​ ​our​ ​darkest​ ​moments.

Just​ ​as​ ​the​ ​day​ ​was​ ​ending
He​ ​changed​ ​the​ ​horizon  
to​ ​a​ ​beautiful​ ​magenta  
and​ ​let​ ​his​ ​golden​ ​sun
​ ​fall​ ​over​ ​the​ ​end​ ​of​ ​day.

He​ ​whispered​ ​good​ ​night
With​ ​a​ ​soft​ ​jasmine​ ​filled​ ​breeze
I​ ​said​ ​softly​ ​i​ ​love​ ​you​ ​God
I​ ​love​ ​how​ ​I​ ​feel  
when​ ​you​ ​are​ ​close​ ​to​ ​me.
Don’t​ ​be​ ​a​ ​stranger​ ​God
Come​ ​back​ ​and​ ​see​ ​me​ ​soon