Back in 1991 after a few mistakes I wanted to keep quiet, so I tried to be like my friend Patrick
Because I mucked eith the young dudes and got drunk with them, I wanted to change my life, so I put on my screaming jets t-shirt and my blur rugger shorts, which looked like shorty shorts and went to civic to play at happy days, and I spent $15 and I bought a can of coke and chips from chicken gourmet and bought an album from impact records, including a jimmy barnes video then I went home to listen to my brothers music and talk to him when he got played tennis against the kitchen wall and after that I cleaned my house very clean and then I watched the jimmy barnes video and I sang each song as I was imagining pat was jimmy barnes petter was diesel and I was John Farnham and then I worked and air guitared jimmy barnes and guns and roses and John Farnham music to my brother and I also crossed my legs playing a Nintendo game underneath my brother as he was playing music I liked his music, and I am sure he liked my air guitar movements and then I watched the kids game show which was on back in those days and I imagined Patrick as the man who hosted it and then the next day I went to the mall to get my pay out of the bank and I bought a trolley load of groceries where I was pushing them around the mall all day as I wanted something to eat while I partied, that was my best way to party, and Patrick said I need to party more if I want to be like us, kids were running by saying I am cool, you are still like your friend and then I wanted to watch a good movie, so I went into civic and watched mosquito coast, I enjoyed that and I bought popcorn and a cup of coke, I walked very secretly around and on other days I went to glebe park ala carte when it was a food court and had 1 meal and a few cokes at the bar watching the band, as I was tapping my fingers on the table
I can’t explain how I looked Patrick but I did
And I went to *** black pool hall to play video games for a while during the night and I had fun
Doing that, I bought a lot of albums as pat and I spent money at *** black like pat I did everything right like pat, I cleaned my house like pat, but I still fought my family like pat used to argue with his, my brother and dad left and refused to stay down there while mum calmed me down but when I was trying to be like Patrick there were no consequences and when I went to bed early the young people came over to ask me for money or to watch ****** like Patrick and we went to st Matthew’s Catholic school and threw our beer cans on the roof of the school and
Pats friend petter was walking past and looked worried, I was like pat with me but my family were different to his, my friends were more like pats brothers to me, I didn’t like how they mucked around messing my house like Patrick
I was like Patrick
Dad told me to just be myself
And I did

You are being very noisy today outside
That is because I am a hooligan, dad
A hoodlum, you really want to be a hoodlum
The word is hooligan you great big ugly snout
You are a coward and you are a fool
You have all these noisy louts over your house
You have no idea of what you are doing
I am a hooligan mate and I want to drink beer
You aren’t a man
No, mate no I am a hooligan, dad
I am going for a walk
I shouldn’t have to cope with this much abuse
I think you are a great big ugly snout for life
Just go to bed with your wife
I feel like drinking so I will have a beer
So I will go up beyond dads liking
And smoke cigarettes whilst playing
A computer game
And dad said you are a hoodlum
Dad. I think the word is hooligan
I will go to pubs like the city club
And I laughed with a kid
And the man said you leave my kid alone
You fool, and I said you should respect me
I have been thinking only fools go to pubs
To drink, cool men like me drink at home
And he said, next time I see you
I will bash you up
And then I was kicked out of the city club
And then I went to the private bin
Where two kids teased me as I was drinking at the window
How are you going ***** they said
And then I went to Pandora’s
To dance with the women
And o called out to dad
See dad, I ain’t too shy to be a man
I am a young man, dad and I party hey
And you are an old fogie dad go away
And now dad, I am dancing with the women
At Pandora’s having fun
You see this is called fun dad
Have you ever heard of fun
It’s what I have when I leave the house
Without you
Then I decided to go to the labor club
In Belconnen and danced to the band there
And I drank 8 beers, thank god
I never got my license hey
And I yelled when I hit my home drunk
Very very drunk
And I said I am a hooligan
Dads an old fogie
I am a hooligan and dads an old fogie
And dad looked down at me
With the look that my brother have me
When he called my brin
Then I put the radio on
With mustang sally and some girls from racey
Which is a band I liked as a kid
I said to dad
You are a great big ugly snout for life
Go to bed with your wife
Then I collapsed on the couch after a good night
Teasing my old man and partying
I am a hooligan, but only to dad
But a family person is what I was being
A real cool family person guys

Ok shy person what are you doing
We give you money
You spend it all
You see Brian you are a bit of a slob
Ha ha ha ha ha he he he
You are still a shy person
Your too shy to be like us
You have no guts to be like us
You are too shy to be like me and mummy mate
Mate what are you doing
I am cool
You, cool, I don’t think so
Ha ha ha ha ha ha he he he he
You know what I hate
Swearing i find swearing repulsive you know
But cool people swear
But you cool, I don’t think so
You are still a shy person Brian,
Ha ha ha ha ha he he he he he
You just muck around in yeah man to mummy
But I am a young dude
And a cool one of that
I will open this can of coke on you
HA HA HA
You are suffering under us cool people
No I am not suffering coward
You are you are a coward
I am cool you are a coward
You haven’t a cool bone in your body
But I haven’t either
I don’t want to be cool
Well, don’t you can get lost
HA HA HA
You spend too much money
You eat too much junk food
I am cool very very cool
You, cool why do you want to be cool for
Because being cool is what young people are
But you, cool
NEVER
Ha ha ha ha ha ha he he he he he
*******
Don’t swear to me, go to your room
You aren’t very cool mate
I don’t want to be cool and either do you
So go to your room right now

We had a lovely cat
And his name was lucky
Beautiful little ***** cat
Smarter than the average rat
You see when he wants food
He will scratch my dad
Till his legs were blood
Didn’t we have a lovely goose
And her name his Lucy
Every time we play Yahtzee
Lucy’s there it give us good luck
And when we do well
We pat his head
What a silly goose
Didn’t we have a lovely Ted
His name was white teddy
He is as cuddly as can be
When you sleep he gives us a good feeling
We had a beautiful cat
His name was snoopy
Snoopy poopy sngeloopy
Looking after his property and his rubber bands
He used to eat twisties
Didn’t we have a lovely cat
And her name was fluffy
Cute little ***** car
Smarter than any rat
You see she used to like mummy
And also loved potato chips
You see she was a lovely cat
Cute dear fluffy

School camps were good
We went to lots of camps
Camp sturt, with the YMCA
And me and my brother
Were the only kids who had
Their parents with them
Hiking, canoeing, indoor activities, abseiling and rock climbing which me and my brother
Weren’t interested in doing it
We did skits where we showed our creative side
Arts and crafts as well as learning
How to skin a snake
We learnt how to pump water from the river
Because river water was unsafe to drink
And we went to birtisgai where we did
All sorts of fun stuff and it was fun
We also went to innebarnya we we learnt more about survival and we went to mount Kosciusko where we went for trips around the snowy
And I did the d of e award scheme where
We did meals on wheels, where we delivered meals to the old people in Canberra we also went hiking in Michelago with the Marist boys run by brother Kevin  st Clare’s and Miricci girls and the Woden school as well, which was my school
And we cooked on the open fire and slept on the hard wooden floor and we sang songs in the truck and the main song was eye of the tiger
By survivor I got teased by Peter roe as well as Rosa and Jennifer who were jealous my family
And I really wanted to love my life in the country side

You see when my brother was born
I didn’t like him crying
I thought there was something wrong with
Him
But despite all that after my terrible ordeals in
The 60s, Cronus made me an intellectual disabled man, but I felt normal
I liked the morning cartoons
And play school and Sesame Street as well as romper room
It took me a while sorr out my bowel movement
Anul leakage, that was very embarrassing for me and mu brother, just being a kid played with my games with his mates and I wasn’t playing it, I liked watching my fave television shows just like a normal kid, my brother tried to break my Batman mask after I broke something of his
We fought a lot when we had the same room, both of us needed our own space and I used to try and kiss all the boys but I only kissed 1, who was David turner, and when I wanted to watch the right on music program, my brother turned the tv over to the banana splits, which wasn’t too bad, another show we liked was the Mickey Mouse club, despite me and my brother watching, we bought the showbsg of it and all, we also bought the CHiPS, which was a show about two motor cycle club, and they had fake radios and I told the family I was talking to
The motorcyclists on the track and my brother no
Your not and me and my brother had two Fonzie jackets and I said Fonzie had a disguise and my
Brother said no he doesn’t and my dad said this Fonzie does and when mr and my
Brother were trying to get out of the pool,
My brother got out and when he couldn’t make it he pushed the thunder tube into me to make me not get out too, I had a friend Lyle who did things with our family, I played cricket with him and we went on a train and every time Lyle went to the toilet, he couldn’t figure out how to get
Out and I had to guide him out of the toilet because was my friend and I was having problems at the YMCA, because there I was my
Brothers brother, all the boys liked my brother more than me, it might be because I pooed my pants, but I couldn’t help it, I grew up and developed schittzophrenia

You see I went out in Kepler mate
To try and have some fun
And besides having a skate park
Ice skating rink and roller skating room
And bmx track there wasn’t much to do
So I went to the ice skating rink
And I had a bit of a skate
But the ice was slippery
And my feet were becoming sore
As the skates really hurt
But eventually I got the hang of it
And I skated around the rink
I know how to avoid hitting the wall
As I skidded right into it
I saw Kylie a friend of mine
Teaching the kids to skate
Each kid had their own little style
So I asked for some advice
Please show my friend how to skate
As good as me
You see when he did it
He fell on his ***
Which scarred him for life
You see it easy to do nothing
But that is the most negative **** to think
What you should do
Is enjoy what you do
Have a skate have a hot chocolate
Then walk around the place
You see it is a shame Kepler hasn’t got much to do
Because it is good to be happy and gay
You see I know there are many
Games that we can all play
You see then I found some snow
Where we can do a bit of skiing
Up the lift down the hill
I nearly slipped right over
You see I am not shy to try this sport
Who knows I might be good
And then I can skate to my daddy
To buy some Kepler food
I enjoyed the skiing and I try roller skates
Next, where I beat the champion at it
But Kepler is the place
That you could skate till your hearts content