We sell different parts of ourselves
Some of us sell bodies for cash
Some of us sell dignity for ambition
Some of us sell our soul for pleasure

Selling happiness for love
Selling love for happiness
You have your price set
Someday someone will buy

Everything has a cost
Everyone has something to sell
We're all ****** in the end
Married in our own hell

I see you, your life, your love, your pain...
I swear I'm looking in a mirror.
Because you and I are so alike
I think if we switched lives we would still be the same.
I'm yin and you're yang even though I'm yang and you're yin.
If you and I were mirrors, we would create infinity in our reflections.

Claws,
Sickly fingernails,
Pull the skin,
Off my pale face.

Darkness, you were once my friend,
My ally,
My protection from people, like a cloak,
But now...

Why did you betray me?
My trust in you was more than,
10,000 fathoms deep.
Why did you betray me?

Shadows lust for my fear,
You play your game against me,
I have no defense,
You've invaded my mind.

Why did you betray me?
I loved you, darkness...

If life lies, why do I try?
If death dies, do I fly?
An unanswered question
Actually two of them

My hope is unwavered
My hope is also dying
Contradictions arise
This logic capsules

My worn and weary heart,
Is made alive by your side,
In your presence I feel good,
You make me so happy.

How could I tell you how I feel?
Would you feel the same thing?
I know my love is the real deal,
I don't want a superficial fling.

I would climb into your ear,
Get inside that pretty head,
Know if your heart is here,
In this river of love I tread.

Could you give me a sign?
A signal?
Show me what you're feeling?
Don't be scared.

Maybe on second thought,
We should lock it all up.
After all time, still be aught,
It's best not to drink this cup.

We shouldn't ruin something this good,
I'm scared of pushing this too far,
If we could be in love I think we would,
This is confusing to me, so bizarre.

Why do You give me peace,
When there is not a single,
Miniscule,
Part of me that is worthy?
Why?

I know I'm undeserving,
Yet forever You renew me.
Your grace always comes,
Your love is steadfast,
You alone are always true.

Manipulating trying to get some skin
Narcissistic guy trying to get a win
Go ahead and make her jealous
But she won't submit to your selfishness

Dude, she's an angel
You wanted a ***** instead
But you're the ***** my man
And she still is a precious angel

So try and drag her down
She'll just fly away
Leaving you alone on the ground
Sinking in your wretchedness

I have the crowning achievement of never being dumped.
I had the miserable demerit of never being truly loved.
Until you.

Please, just let me scream my hurt away
I don't want your love or sympathy
I don't need your care or affection
This hurt is beyond your efforts
Let me slip into the darkness
Let me be swallowed alive
It's up to me to make it
Hope I see you again

This is my coffin
I dug the hole six feet deep
It's actually quite comfortable
Except soon I can't breathe

I laid down in it
Then nailed it shut with headless nails
Pulled the string to let the dirt bury me
Ignited a glow stick so I won't be in the dark

Except now I'm reconsidering
The life of the afterlife
I'm thinking I signed my death warrant
A little bit too hastily

So now I'm six feet under
Dying and wanting to live
Looks like I'm in need of a savior
But nobody knows where I am

Why does Doctor Who always run?
He's done so much good, and helped so many
He always tries to do the right thing
He always fights against the evil of the universe

Why can't he keep a companion?
He's always looked out for them
He's always cared for them and had their backs
He's done nothing but give them adventure

Why is he nameless?
Because no matter how much good he does
No matter how many right things he does
No matter how much evil he slays
No matter how much he looks out
No matter how much he cares
No matter how many adventures

It
Isn't
Enough

There's always the past that's unforgivable
And he never stays because he knows he's a poison
Who will destroy everything he repairs

Doctor Who is never good enough for himself
He's his own judge, jury, and executioner

Loneliness has caught me in its poisonous grasp,
Settling and soaking into my damaged mind,
Rooting itself upon my admirable character,
Leeching away what is lovely about me.

I drain slowly away,
Like a leaking glass,
Drip drip drip
Down the crack,
Onto the ***** floor.

This
    Desire
      Is
        Killing
          Me
         ­   But
              I'm
                Dead
                  Fulfilling
                    It.

Somehow I've stopped writing to be me
I tried to be a better writer and I lost myself
Tried to drown out all the pain and love
Tried to replace it with form and correctness
I got a bit out of whack with my muse
No longer will that happen, I promise
Guess this is all I got right now. Glad to be back.

I don't think I'd want to leave in a dramatic fashion
With a glorious party full of people giving their best wishes.
I'd think I'd much rather it be totally unknown that I had gone; people still going about, not noticing the lack of me.

I would probably just slip on a coat, a hat, and some glasses and slip out a side door while everyone mingles in large groups.
I would simply melt into the sea of faces walking along the street and become like a drop in the ocean. Indistinguishable.

The worst of the night
Is that creeping fatal doubt
That leeches onto my spirit
Reminding me I'm not good

The worst of the night
Is that familiar aching
Deep in my heart, no
The aching that is my heart

The worst of the night
Is recalling the whole day
And remembering what I
Should have done differently

The worst of the night
Is knowing tomorrow is coming
No matter what happens, it comes
And my demons wait for me

La dee da doo,
I'm in love with you.
La dee da doo,
I'll stick like glue.

Lee lee la la,
You make me haha.
Lee lee la la,
Let's never say ta ta!

Zoop a zee,
Will you kiss me?
Zoop a zee,
My love, don't you see?

I feel my heart right now
It's being pried open by something burning
I hate this feeling
It's always how I feel when I'm going to fall

My heart is being ripped apart
Yet I refuse to sacrifice this love
It will not be lost like a cheap gift card
Full will it's bloom ever be!

Nurtured and grown, it's not yet ripe
When it becomes so let's harvest our fruit
To waste this away would be a crime
So lock me up as a prisoner of love!!!

Tonight will not be the night
Because tonight I fight the fight
The fight of waiting on you
Until the time is right for harvest

Bleeding out...
Bleeding out...
Not a drop of blood
But I'm bleeding out dead

Love has abandoned you and I
Not a one to lie by our side
What reason to carry on?
When all alone we are?

Is a cut wrist better than a cut heart?
I can assure you it isn't
Why?

"Loneliness is a part of our experience and if we are looking for relief from loneliness in friendship or relationship, we are only going to frustrate the friendship. Friendship, camaraderie, intimacy, all those things, and loneliness live together in the same experience..."

I'm an insomniac, just like many other poets
And this lack of restful sleep is quite potent
I want to drift into dreams of puffy clouds
And puppies, cakes... murdering crowds?

Yes, my dreams are very violent
And the screams are never silent
I really do love them, though
I just wish I brought more ammo

The blood and death brings me peace
A bliss that's never matched when awake
Never do I desire for the killing to cease
Because for me it's sweeter than cheesecake

Maybe you think I should get therapy
But I tell you, for me, that's all heresy
And I'd suggest that you speak carefully
Or you'll end up in my sleeping barbarity

Sometimes it doesn't work with someone you love.
You give everything and it's not enough. It just comes up short. But that's no reason to give up.
Because the pain will subside, the hurt will stop, and the emptiness will be refilled.
Because love can be totally broken, but never destroyed.
And love's ability to be renewed is like nothing else in this world.

Right now I can't write
Because I can't express how I feel
Words are woefully unprepared for me
And what is bursting inside of my heart

So let this pen
So let this paper
Be overwhelmed
In this supernova

When I am a slave to my own desires,
To my own lusts,
More than I am a slave to You,
To Your Holy Spirit,

I know by my flesh alone,
My worthiness to You,
Is lower than a speck of dust,
Measured against eternity.

You bewilder me with Your,
All-consuming, divine and unfailing grace.

You do it not for my sake, but for Yours.
You alone are all worthy!

Because of You,
Because of what You did,
I am justified in Your almighty eyes,
For you see Your Sacrificial Son covers me.

My transgressions are wiped away,
Stains that were permanent,
Washed by Your blood.

Thank you, Abba!
Your love is mightiest!
All my sins cannot withhold against Your AWESOME POWER!

*"Lord, forgive us when we get consumed by the things of this life that fight for our love, our passion.

As our eyes are open wide on You, Lord, grant us the privilege of Your world view.

And may Your Kingdom be what wakes us up and lays us down.

Amen."

I've been on the cliff's edge a few times in my life
Staring at the sharp rocks that could claim my life.
Yes, I've wanted to jump before
To let the stones take my bones.

I could stay there for a long time, too.
Long enough for hunger to tear at my stomach
Long enough for my tongue to crack from dryness.

But I never fell off the edge.
Not because I had a revelation.
Not because I felt life needed living.
Not because I won against depression.

I simply turned around
And I started walking life again
And the days got better and worse
But I kept walking; I don't need to die.

I laugh like a maniac as serenity bleeds out at my feet,
The walls of protection that kept me from harm,
Crumbled to dust as I blew them sky high,
Destroying myself for the good of all.

What would you have me do?
Have a starlit night in peace and quiet?
I will not be the one who lives happily ever after.

I will do my best to bring myself to ruin,
Ruin of my own flesh and blood will come,
Call me crazy, call me insane,
It's why I do what I always do.

Wilted,
Withered,
On my knees,
Hysterical and broke.

The trigger I pull stems from a bottle,
The blood that fails us, made only of water.

You cannot **** what isn't living,
You can only die from not breathing.

such a sigh
echoes
in places
no sounds are allowed

such pain
bleeds
and stains
in ways water cant clean

last words
hurt
in ways
that echo and bleed

they stain
the parts of my mind
locked away
yea, locked away

Silhouettes of shapeless design dance upon lighted canvas walls,
As the moon totters and topples between a black hole and your heart,
Ripping apart the space-time continuum of my already fractured skull,
Spewing forward from my sanguine eyes, a rainbow of discarded harmony and abstract ink blotches.

My mind enshrined itself whilst my thoughts unraveled like a Halloween treat from its wrapper,
Slipping between the bars of the grated floor and tumulting through pipes of unsavory character,
Spilling out from portals to the unrelenting yet ultimately mortal season of water,
Untimely demises are plotted by my cranial nerves to usher in revenge and animosity.

Chasing after you is like a merry-go-round ride...
You're always in front of me, close to me...
But I can never actually get you...

Yet I always get off and put another quarter in the **** thing...
So in the end...
You're not to blame...

Here I am faking my smile for you
Cracking jokes and causing laughs
I'm dying inside and you can't see
"Everything's okay" no it's not

I pasted on my signature cheerfulness
And wear a smile that nobody hates
I pour out care and love on you
All the while dying in my heart

Such a good mask I always wear
If you could only see the tears beneath
The salty poison running down
My face is shrouded in lies and shadow

Do you see my addiction, God?
Do you see me turning my back on you?
Do you see my double facedness?
Do you see through my lies?
I want to stop, God.
Please let me stop.
I want to be Your image.
All I have is my trust that You love me;
Even that is not mine, but a gift from You.
Let me overcome this.

I remember the giddiness I had as a small child;
All the world was a grand adventure!
Pirates sailed the seas,
Monsters hid in your closet,
The moon was just a cardboard box away!

Life was so much simpler,
The whole morning revolved around,
Spongebob and Tom & Jerry,
The afternoon was time to play,
Evening was all about what dessert we would have,
Nighttime we would get stories of dragons and knights and princesses.

Each color through a child's eyes is vivid and awesome.
They see the world through a kaleidoscope,
And laugh in the most beautiful ways.

I would love to be a child once again,
And fly with the dinosaurs,
To the moon.

I tried writing a poem for you.
But just like the words that,
Get stuck,
In my throat when I try to tell you.
They never met the paper;
Lost somewhere in the pen...
Or maybe locked in my heart.

In the event of love... kiss
In the event of heartbreak... cry
In the event of tragedy... weep
In the event of holding on... keep holding
In the event of marriage... make love
In the event of a birth... celebrate
In the event of death... mourn
In the event of opportunity... seize it
In the event of friends... hug
In the event of life... never forget to live

Life's too short to be wasted.

to quietly suffer
to quietly heal
to lose everything
to lose nothing
the parts of the whole
that erased my soul
to start over again
a blessing that depends
on the seeds grown
in a mind that groans