Changing crowds has been helpful
Away from the toxic negative people
Vibing on the team and success
Seeing the hard work pay off
Putting in the time paying dues
Seeing one of you team mates move up
Makes you want to do the same
Be better you know what
Needs to be done to get there
Get more technical with things
Improve your performance
Be about it stop talking
Tired of being stuck
Over being in the transition
Get to the next level
Challenge yourself everyday

They left you alone trying to throw heats of shade your way. Only calling you when they need something half the time you treat me different looking down on me. I mind my own don't care to come around. You know me down but I'm back up. What's worse is your my blood instead of backing me up your cursing me for not following. I'm my own person could handle being alone while you all gang up on me. Make me feel over the edge but not jumping off falling you're not responsible for my fate. Walking strong never giving up on my faith focused on destiny. You're not helping me you have no right or no say in my life. My self-esteem builds more confident the less I interact standing talk not letting you hold me back putting doubt in my head not listening to lies these rumors you spread. You'll try to beat me only way is when I'm dead. Deep frustrations coming out not pretending to be your friend I let the drama die not letting you in my head free from you no more dreading the day moving on no need to stay.

Things don't make sense anymore
Once was wrong not it's right
So many turn a blind eye
don't care unless it's about them
Broke free to be on my own
Too much going on in the mind
Hard to sleep thoughts are deep
Asking do I have it anymore
Does it matter will I make a difference
What happened to me, who I was
Can't be that person anymore
so many remind me of who I was
instead of accepting me for who I am
Who I've become not sure anymore
Things will never be the same
Grow and changed can't live in the past
Smile is real not faking it since it's real
so many mistake it for weakness

He gave up his dream for love and it didn't work out. Learning to love himself trying to get back on track. He's not far from success but knows it will take hard work to get there. Battled up hill battles and struggled to make it through make it to the end the others side no where to run or hide. He couldn't avoid his destiny when the people he loved became a distraction. More road blocks and obstacles he didn't need or want the toxic to destroy his vision.

Told not to associate with the snitch
Now a days everyone takes pride in doing so
Trying to help out now you talking behind everyone back
Ain't no one talking about you or your ways
Trying to make calls tell people how to live
Get your life together before looking down on others
Talking about others don't make you a better person
Thinking you are better is not the same as acting like you are
Trying to use false narratives to get others to be in your side
Expecting others to be loyal you double crossed them as well
Sooner or later your word holds no credibility
Doing wrong trying to justify it as right
After being ignored no one is fighting to be around
Make it easier to leave without any doubt
Trying to use others as a pond in the scheme
Everyone will know the truth see your true colors
See through the act eventually no one feels bad for you

Not to fond of the holidays thanksgiving a time to be around family but year around no one gets along or talks unless favors are needed. Can't eat turkey because being allergic just means eat ham. Don't really have traditions but a sister is making the notion that we should start our own traditional feast. Not too fond of the ideas being forced to interact with brothers that make everything person but claim it's a joke. Once you return the favor they can not dish what they serve. Love family but not like them and never felt like one of them. Blood doesn't make you family because close friends treat you like you belong and matter.
Christmas is a time for family as well but not expecting gifts or giving them out. Usually go with and aunt or best friend never feels like anyone is into the season. After these times are over life goes back to normal. Where family doesn't talk or impose their ways. Not close to anyone because being my own person means much. No awkward conversations about being single or talking about my personal life with a stranger. Like privacy but being able to feel safe when expressing my thoughts instead of everything being used against me for some useless argument that has nothing to do with me because not empowering that nonsense walking away makes it easier then having to encounter misconduct by family that in their mind is seen as looking out.

Dating it use to be easy you ask a girl out
It was about *** before but it's harder to get to know a person.
Now that you are looking for someone to be your other half share experiences with
The roles have switched times have changed
Women liked men who took charge and preferred to be wined and dined
Now a days everyone wants the perks of a relationship and don't want to commit
No one settles for one love but things being loved by many will last
As I get older it does not get easier sometimes the younger generation are interested and not always a match
Age is just a number but when you feel like your number is being called it's not what you expect
Loyal and true to the wrong people while they accuse you of cheating when they are the ones commiting these decietful acts
Saying I love you to the one feels right when you just say it the word love loses value
Meaningless *** leave you feeling meaningless value lost within from head to toe

As his elders retired he felt the pressure being in the heart of the town the curb appeal would need to be kept up. The bar was set high but no pressure that was the joke among the crew.
Change was coming the trio awaited their fourth member all they wanted was someone who worked and got their stuff done took pride in their work. Not expecting too much but did want this person to carry their load fill that burden without designating it to others.

Sometimes is normal but shouldn't be
You respect it but disagree breaking free
Changing the old way make it better
Losing yourself in the process
Adding some ***** to the persona
Being yourself and caring more than most
A good guy turned seen as a heel
Asking questions trying to understand
Having an opinion standing on moral ground

He entered the building ignoring his bitter employees focused on doing the work. A lead that pretends to care but all about himself. Every lie hurt his ears he got tired of listening doing his part and going home. That was his new mindset work with his given time then went home.
He was the overachiever in an underachiever. He took pride in his work while most settle gave up with no ambition. Everyone talking about each other but he wanted no part of that nonsense and craziness.
The betrayal was real not going back if the opportunity was real. He set boundaries and everyone looked at him like he was crazy.  
His health came up when he was sick he'd cover now they are saying he can't do his job now that he is better. It's the two faced people with their condescending tone that was extremely is exhausting.

Reflecting on the past in the dark room
More bad than good positive thoughts
Trying to make sense of it all
Lost love hoping to be found
Losing focus years of wandering
Refusing to stay in one place
Hard to take in the moment
Never going back to what caused pain
Finding peace dropping the burden
Time away to heal and cope
Understand the complicated situation
Find a steady foundation leveled out

Can't wrap my mind around the madness of others they think they are helping but just making things complicated. The worse part is it's my family. I stopped judging others because those people are in my family but how long do you turn a blind eye? How much do longer do you avoid them but they seem to be back making your blood boil. Not an angry person but the mind won't let it go in and out circling thoughts of say this do that. It's better to do nothing instead of being self destructive don't need others to make bad decision could be done alone. If they knocked you take them down with you make them feel their wrath and you take the blame while they play victim. So hard to escape enjoy life when you think that shouldn't of happened, why did it happen? How could've you prevent it but it's too late it already happened.

He woke up early for the first time in a while since his sleep patterns where ******* up. He learned a huge lesson he always seen good in others and would stop giving others the benefit of the doubt. They would tell him when he already knew. He did respect them but for some reason
They mocked him and thought he owed them without working for it. He was not entitled but knew he had to work twice as hard to get there when he did strive through they would be bitter rather than be happy for him.

Anytime you do a project or step on a stage
You don't want it to end that world feels right
Once you go back to reality it's never the same
That moment of fame becomes a high when you come down you can't get enough

He danced with his loneliness while they looked down on him. He loved them but held onto all those horrible things they said. He thought who do they think are; what gives them the right to think, they could talk to him that way.
He was always respectful minded his mouth. He didn't get involved hed provide a solution but it just lead to more problems. Sad and disturbed by the harsh reality. He seen them ***** ppl only a matter of time till he took the knife of betrayal.

Taking risks and lost it all
Still crazy enough to come back
Can't get enough wanting more
Haters don't try and hate on you
Doing nothing expecting something
Put in the time to earn your place
Another mad face in the way
No time for drama it's pay day
Worked for mine earned every cent
Taking credit for work not done
makes no sense always on offense
Liars defensive scam and planning
Working to win focused on greatness
Tired of all cheaters piggybacking
Never accepted by family standards
Only rejected by made-up rules
Being myself not what someone said
Winning even when narrative is false
Twisted words fueled by manipulation
Trying to infect others' perspectives
Traditions not in your best interest
Pushing limits rising up a level
Being restricted feeling stuck
It's hard to move, not able to breathe

Some days are bad most are better
Not letting bad habits over come the good deeds
Love family but some are all about their greed
Be with someone you love treats you right
Why settle for less when you deserve the best
Be with someone you love not use one another for selfish gain
Failed love can't be repaired the pain will strike a nerve
Words full of lies that mean nothing failed out you pretend everything is fine
Two world's collide instead of unite the after math only time will tell

Made some moves can only go so far
Impatient trying not to rush
Plays out great in the mind
The outcome turns out differently
Going for the win stuck with the loss
More to learn from the loss
Gain strength and growth
Be better prepared for the next time
Once was sad got over it meant for better
Hard to trust around the wrong people
Seen good in others proved wrong
Never said anything everyone is talking
Feeling set up to fail trying not to struggle
Focused on more opportunities
Not using others to get ahead
Doing the work not talking

He decided to stay out of it work was way more important than drama. These thoughts are dark and deep could change the tone. Straight forward mostly honest getting no love or respect. Just stayed quiet observed listen to the what was going on.
Always tired demeanor changed working through staying honest and true. Things got wild so personal things got cruel.

Some friend slandering your character trying to take a girl off your hands. Thinking you can take and touch something that's not yours. A friend wouldn't do that sad to think. Trusting the wrong people hyping them up to be left disappointed.
Not a cheater and it's not welcomed. A person that cheats will get friends to lie and cover up their shady actions. No one wants that pressure or responsibility. If you can't stay loyal and true stay single because it just hurts and wastes everyone's time.
Don't have kids if you can't support them it's the worse when a child feels like it's their fault because the parents aren't there. Unworthy of love being left discouraged watching one parent drunk and the other working hard to provide. Be there instead of picking and choosing when to be a parent. It's a lifestyle not pick and choose when it's convenient.

The odds against him
Not scared or backing down
Pushed back not getting punked
Proved them wrong time
And time again meant for better
Not settling for less another
Rising up against the crazy
Moving forward part of the struggle

He stared at himself in the mirror
So much internal conflict within
Trying to walk with God stay clear of drama
Keep a clean head on his shoulder
Grew up hood not a punk down for his
Trying to be better turning away
The gesture is mistaken for running
Minding his mouth keeping the peace
Cold honesty his words became **** shots
A stone look that seeks the truth
Restrain his emotions no weakness
Numb feelings not one to mess with

He didn't agree with all the lies and BS. Never doing that to others why did they think it was okay to send all those bad vibes in his direction.
Staying sober and clean trying to stimulate his mind open to new experiences while some set in their ways expecting others to change but making no effort to change all the bad behavior they impose on others differences.
He had respect for his oppressors they kicked him to the curb because he didn't live up to some hypothetical standards. He saw it as another way to keep him out because he could surpass without needing their opinions or made up nonsense that brought doubt to anyone trying to better themselves.

Training for a fight that may or may not happen. At the park working on drills and conditioning to go the round and the distance. So many outside factors causing a fuss. A job opportunity that seemed promising but hasn't been a pleasant transition. Trying to move up to the next level and maintain keep building up. The idea of starting over is overwhelming.
Giving up the old for new trying to remain the same but everything changes. The mindset and body something are containable while others are a lost cause. Stuck on them wondering how and why things turned out the way they did. Not going back but staying away from that insanity.

He was being social reaching out to old peers hoping that he could chat it up be himself. It was fun to catch up instead of being kept out. Taking on bad attitudes not feeding into bad vibes.
Motivation by the uninspired when around them. With the overachievers not feeling on that level working twice as hard behind the scenes working in private.
Being positive around negative people staying out of the drama being more private but feeling isolated by those that he cared for not feeling like an equal among them.

Asked a question
It doesn't sound right
Trying to follow the logic
Moral code set in place
Not letting others dictate
Did the work didn't complain
Looked out spoke out wasn't heard
Excluded kept out avoiding drama
Change and turn the page
Still learning and growth is desired
Not taking on the settling ego
Never settle for average be more
Hasn't happened yet in the works