It's been almost 3 years since
you and I have gotten along.
3 years since our song changed,
since our dance shifted off beat.
at our feet, our children rest.
watching for our best, watching us.
we have been holding this together for us.
for them,
I tell them what a great dad you are.
how much you mean to them.
they know you will always come home.
and you have, and I am proud of you
and I know you feel I wish to see you fall,
the choices I had to make for my
own rise,
the woman you always wished I would be,
the one you were waiting to see,
the one you had to hurt to see,
the one that would chose love over sores,
that would heal her heart, again
pulling back on lessons of back then,
when pain was on my chest.
how did I find my best then,
what did I let out...?
you've said I do not understand,
you hint to I am missing your feelings,
that all the low energy has been given
out of defense, though there has been no attack.
you fight against my own path,
the river of me,
my currents are strong.
capable of breaking things down, quickly,
silently, starting in the heart.
I get in there and I break down the bonds,
the electrical signals get recharged,
tuned for new muscle memories.
I see that you're hurt,
that you felt the words you and I said
would keep us bounded,
I see, I hear how abandoned you feel
and that you think I should have
allowed things,
you just are missing my heart.
our deep parts have been drowned out,
filled with warm waters of change,
the stormy mouth, the dark core.
only warm spouts out,
the cracks healed, slowly rubbing down the edges.
the earth always gives to the waters roar.
you were my earth for so long,
and I loved how we molded each other,
you told me to find my self,
my love, I found this other version of me.
I found out, I do not have to accept this
frequency of love.
I just don't.
and now, after 3 years
I can't. I am no longer tuned to your song.
allow my heart to sound as it does.
I still hear your heart,
it beats in the chest of my child,
of my womb,
of the next image of me.
I watch you, I will love you
no thing will change this.
and we will continue to raise our children,
raise them up to be healthy and strong,
love them while they are home, and
maintain their foundation.
it's just been so long,
the conversations are done.
the separation of our physical bond is complete
and now we move on.
please, let's move on.
there's so much to discuss...