Could you refrain from pointless text messages
that force me to politely respond
when all i want to do is pour out my thoughts
about how you really need to move on
because you've already been replaced with a boy who has more freckles than you do
and who doesn't have a constant need to be dominant.
Could you please stop smiling at me in the hallway like we are still friends
because we aren't and no matter what you convince yourself
you will never convince me that we were anything but an experiment
to see if two people could really spend the same day of every week
at the same time
doing the same thing
and fall in love within the limits
of our parents
and the answer is no its not possible
and you can't convince me that its love
despite how many times those 3 words escaped my mouth
i will not let myself believe that your everlasting need for competition
and my constant shrinking is what love is
and that the fact that whenever i see you i get irritated
is what happens when two people stop loving each other.
I don't believe that thats even possible
and if love is truly one person growing and the other shrinking
one falling in love even more and the other suffocating in resentment
then i want nothing to do with it.

Make sure she's tall but not taller than you.
Make sure he's opinionated but knows how to be quiet
Make sure she's invested in something, but not too much because thats just annoying.
She should be skinny but not boney
Curvy but not fat.
He should have a certain hair color but not dyed
Her Hair long but not frizzy
He's Kind but not passive
She's Smart but not smarter than you
Once high school began I realized that people are smallest between grades 9-12.
This is when you start letting other people crawl in the the gapping hole
Which is the negative space that used to be self confidence.
You stop being proud of your sailing bruises because people say that they look ugly on your legs
You stop dying your hair because people say they like natural
You start to nod at the ignorant things that enter your ears
And start to ask others if you have the right to be angry.
Taking up space begins to be a challenged you have to concentrate on
Because the galaxies that you were apart of before
Start to shrink to just a single planet.
Stop saying that you don’t, care when you do
And stop changing yourself for anyone other than your own two eyes
Stop accepting words that prove that they know you
And start asking people to talk to you like they love you.
Take in the people that love you because of your sneeze
And because that you take pride in your scars.
That will still want to play with your hair if its short and blue
Take the people that love you for things you can’t change.
Teach people that the difference between love and lust is friendship
That just because you call them your best friend doesn't mean you’ve friend zoned them.
That just because they can regurgitate facts about you, doesn't mean they care about you.
Dye your hair green
Cry because you succumbed to their wishes of straight hair and skimpy clothes
Leave them because they encouraged you to.
Deny the next persons demands
Take up space and don’t apologize for it.

They are tall. They have freckles. Their voice is presumably lower than yesterday. They make you laugh. They look at you when you speak. They answer your calls at 1am. They smell nice. Their smile, their hands, their vibrance can suddenly invade your conscious and you aren't really sure how they never did before.

We can kiss. We can kiss, and only be friends. And we can tell ourselves that it'll stay the same, because for a while, it will. We can continue to kiss, and continue to go on with our days like it doesn't effect us. But if we do proceed to let our lips touch, then someday it'll hit us. That things like this don't happen for fun, or because of physical attraction. They happen because somewhere along the lines, we decided in order to go on with our days, we needed those kisses. And the day they don't happen, will be the day that things change

Everything we do, has a consequence. So if you plan on wrapping me around your finger, you best prepare to lose circulation.

And now when we talk, my hands become alien things. Touching and pulling at things that are just fine where they are. My words become too big in my mouth, and tumble out whenever it opens. Maybe you should hear them, maybe you shouldn't

You taught me how to voice my opinions and goals
then you taught me to be ashamed of having dreams.
You taught me how to take it one day at a time
then you taught me to hope for tomorrow to be better.
You taught me to laugh out loud at everything
then taught me to laugh even when it wasn't funny.
You taught me to wear my heart on my sleeve
then you taught me that the consequence is people can spit all over it.
You taught me how to stay
and then i taught you how to leave.