I know you hate me
with parts of your heart
you never even knew existed
and i can't deny
that i deserve it and that i was selfish
with your feelings
and careless with your heart
but please don't let your life suffer
because of my mistakes
don't fall into the trap of sadness
because you deserve better than me
and the only way you'll get it
is by taking yourself seriously
dont ***** it up
you don't get a rerun

I find it so astonishing
that people can stand
to marry or date
or be friends with people
who aren't pretty on the inside
that don't think thoughts
but just recreate what has been
forced into their mouths.
I find it so astonishing
that humans are exactly
as materialized and shallow
as we make ourselves out to be

i'm having a really difficult time
trusting the process.
That if i do everything
that is expected of me
i will be okay.
Because I've done
almost everything right
and i am most definitely
not okay

Why does growing up seem so amazing
when your 11 years old?
Why do you want so badly
to receive trust
or independence?
Because to get that
you need knowledge.
and knowledge
requires seeing your heroes
turn human

Have you ever noticed
that poems are kind of like
paragraphs except
with
many
indentations.

I keep trying to start this
in a way that gets my feelings across
but that is incredibly difficult
when i don't even know what my feelings are.
I don't know what i want to happen
or for you to
say or
do or act.
I don't know what i should
say or
do or act.
I hate being in the dark with you
because i can only swing blindly
for what you want.
I wish i hadn't met you
because no happiness is worth
this
much
stress

I want you to realize
Realize how much of me you have in your hand.
Handle me a little more gently.
Gentleman who barge and crash aren't looked upon fondly.
Fondling with my feelings isn't something I'm ok with.
Without you I collapse into pieces.
Piece me back together.
Together until I'm one
One without you.