I don't bargain
Not anymore
I spend my time with ghosts
Because their stories are finished
And I know the endings
I stay in happy places
No matter the cost
Years sometimes
Just to check out at 4am
If I feel disrepected
I have learned powerful things:
Nothing is dispensable
Something will always fill the void
Even if it's just the voices in my head
So, no. I don't bargain anymore
I give what I choose
I take what is offered
I choose early departures
But I still arrive late
Or even not at all
That is my liberty
That is my strength
That is the thing I like most about myself.

Sleep now while you are able
Dawn hits hard

So many things
I care nothing about now
As society says I should
My soul disagrees

It is heaven.
Crickets
Peace
Breath
Smiles
Warmth
Weightless
But that one wormhole to hell
Remains

I curse the body
That wont die timely
The body that outlives hope

The more I rise toward heaven
The less I want of earth
Indifference is an easy aide
Dullness has it's worth
For logistics, not my matter
The world is not my care
My natural home is calling
All desire waits up there
Minutes are just tangled
In a web within my mind
Memories pale, illusive
I've eternity yet to find
So pull me..pull me closer
My God please take me in
Illuminate what's before me
Remove all that once had been
Breathe me up your staircase
Let all your stars just smile
I never even belonged here
I've been ready for a while
As for the pain of others
It's just a worldly show
That fades to black behind you
And means nothing as I go

And lips that have been silent long,
  Forevermore will silent be;
No words could e'er right a wrong,
  Such as the one 'twas done to me.
And it is my hurt,  alone,  to heal;
  Remorse; regret;  afflict him none;
And yet, his heart, I still can feel,
  Though it's long been said and done.