You know me for who I am
Not the title that I have
I'm the girl who breaks the rules
And I got that from my dad

I don't sit back and take what's left
I go and grab life and I go
My title doesn't define me
I reap the seeds I sow

I might be a Preacher's Daughter
I don't do the things I oughta
That is him, not me
I believe what I believe
I lead my life not to decieve
God shed your light on me


Life is out there for the taking
I'm who I am, I am not faking
He is who he is and I am me
Take me as I am or leave me be

Daddy knew the things I did
I've told my sins and some I've hid
The acorn fell away from this old tree
He is who he is, and I am me

I might be a Preacher's Daughter
I don't do the things I oughta
That is him, not me
I believe what I believe
I lead my life not to decieve
God shed your light on me

I know heaven holds my place
But, they may never see my face
I live the live I live that's all I say
I don't live for tomorrow, just today

I know wrong and I know right
One day I may see the light
The direction that I choose is up to me
But, until that day comes just let me be

I might be a Preacher's Daughter
I don't do the things I oughta
That is him, not me
I believe what I believe
I lead my life not to decieve
God shed your light on me

I might be a Preacher's Daughter
I don't do the things I oughta
That is him, not me
I believe what I believe
I lead my life not to decieve
God shed your light on me

I've lost count of the taverns
Where my face has  kissed the floor
at least twenty down in Texas
Arizona, fourteen more
twenty three in California
In Wyoming, seventeen
You can see there's lots of places I've been drunk
But, haven't seen


Kissed sixteen floors down in Nevada
Twelve in Idaho
Four over  in Hawaii
and  in New Mexico
It's not that I'm a fighter
It isn't that I'm mean
I'm just a drinker with a problem
In the places that I've been

It doesn't matter where I am
I'm not selective, not at all
I drink, I get in trouble
I get hit, and then I fall
I move around the country
Kissing floors in every state
I'm an alcoholic punching bag
Kissing bar floors is my fate

I kissed six in Massachuesetts
Eleven more in Washington
Twice, I ended on a table
So, I just count them as one
New Jersey I kissed plenty
I lost count up in New York
Up there the floors are softer
Some floors are filled with cork

Florida, I kissed the beach
Seven times, at least I think
One time doesn't count though
I kissed the beach and didn't drink
Lousianna, kissed a lot there
There's a lot of floors to kiss
I hit every bar down on Canal Street
There wasn't one I didn't miss

In South Dakota, can't remember
Not too many bars around
But, I did get in trouble once
And yes....I kissed the ground
Virginia, and Ohio
Up in Minnesota too
In Michigan, oh man oh man
I kissed near twenty two

In Illinois I kissed nineteen
In Georgia, I kissed nine
I found six teeth where I last fell
And only two of them were mine
there is not one location
Where my face and floors have kissed
I'm an alcoholic travel guide
And I keep running into fists

It doesn't matter where I am
I'm not selective, not at all
I drink, I get in trouble
I get hit, and then I fall
I move around the country
Kissing floors in every state
I'm an alcoholic punching bag
Kissing bar floors is my fate

I am torn between two paths,
but to make my own is to
leave my fellow travelers behind

in summer,
steel-hearted girls
play dress up,
hiding fears
in secret parts of their souls,
swallowing keys
to unvoiced thoughts,
and swearing
to keep their lips sealed tight

in summer,
steel-hearted girls
play dress up,
searching for the
perfect disguise

I cut myself again for the last time the night before last, proceeding to fall asleep, hoping I wouldn’t open my eyes this morning.
Waking up to a floored mascara line so straight down my cheek, I didn’t know tears could glide so unbent.
Ruler aligned cuts stand ***** like railroad ties over the flesh of my wrist.
I walk around, careful because I’m concealing a secret that only I can possibly know.
The bracelets hugging the veins in my wrist are nothing but a fashion statement working to disguise the cuts that haven’t yet turned to scars.
I walk around, half hoping someone notices, but still praying they don’t.
The feeling as if everyone around me can hear the thoughts whispering inside my head as they grow louder the more I try and look someone in the eye.
Can they see that the dam inside my eyes broke and was put together when I focused on keeping the blood contained from my wounds?
Gambling with the idea that the people I walk by and next to and towards know that I tossed and turned too many times to remember.
Risking and hoping the **** Band-Aids won’t draw attention to the damage I’ve done to my skin,
Until I take them off, allowing the cuts to breathe,
To heal into scars.

You don’t need to be deep to write. I found you can swim for hours through the depths of the most shallow person, so long as they’re honest.

There’s a simplicity in honesty, that’s what captures people. Not navigating through mazes of big words and made up metaphors that don’t make sense.

When you write, write lightly. Let your honesty leave the impact.

I've a song stuck in my head
No words, but it's still there
Trundling on with out a thought
It's something I should share

De da doodle la la de ding
boo bar fiddle riddle king
si saw be bop shhh shhh bing
do waddle dip don boom

There's no direction to where it goes
It's a melody of sorts
I've words a plenty, they don't fit
I've just this thing and all its warts

De da doodle la la de ding
boo bar fiddle riddle king
si saw be bop shhh shhh bing
do waddle dip don boom

I play nothing, but hear guitar
some drums there in behind
A backup singer singing loud
And a bass to keep in time

De da doodle la la de ding
boo bar fiddle riddle king
si saw be bop shhhh shhhhh bing
do waddle dip don boom

I was in an abusive relationship once.. But it was a bit different.

You see, he was always the last thing on my mind before I went to sleep, and the first thing on my mind when I woke up.

He used to kiss me softly every night before I went to sleep.

He used to wake me up gently in the mornings and make me breakfast. He would run my bath water to the perfect temperature.

He used to escort me to the bus stop before work when the sun was yet to relieve the night sky of its shift.

He was always there. He lived in my mind and that's where he birthed complacency.

His first name was What, and his last name was If.

He never gave me time to myself, he never let me speak.

I tried to walk out on him. I swear I did, but he'd visit me at 4 a.m. and I would simply let him in. He would keep me up all night, forcing himself on me... In me. He wouldn't leave when I cried get out.

I was in an abusive relationship once, as scary as it is, I might still be.

All this time I thought it was a man, but what if, What If is a she?

What if all this time it was myself?

I've finally came to see.

What if all this time, What If is really me?

Counting stars (edited October 18/13)


Looking at the night time sky
Staring at the stars
counting all that we can see
Serenaded by the cars
clouded sky and rainy nights
full moon and sometimes none
I cherish counting stars with you
You are my only one

Making wishes on the shooting ones
Knowing what we see is gone
In the twinkle of an instant
Their light may now be done
In the darkness of a moon filled night
Lying, counting stars with you
It doesn't matter how high we get
we may even just see two

I know we can not count them all
If we stay here 'till we die
The thing that is important
Is that we just give it a try
Each night we begin again
The stars come out to play
Counting stars each night with you
My first wish comes true each day

Imagine, if there's someone there
Counting stars, and we are one
That they look at and imagine
On the far side of the sun
thinking, what is going on
Way out there in space
counting stars, like I with you
brings a smile to my face

Lying here just holding hands
And counting stars we see
Just knowing that this point in time
belongs to you and me
counting some we do not see
A speck in outer space
Lying, counting stars with you
this is my favorite place

I know we can not count them all
If we stay here 'till we die
The thing that is important
Is that we just give it a try
Each night we begin again
The stars come out to play
Counting stars each night with you
My first wish comes true each day





       

I live a life that's far from normal
Normal as you all do see
My world is...well, more nocturnal
Look real hard and you'll find me

Living life like I do's different
It's not a life I recommend
It works for me, but I'm not normal
My life is somewhat at loose ends

I'm off the grid, I'm a non-person
I'm a statistic and nothing more
I'm just a shadow in the shadows
I'm looking for my next big score

You pass me as you walk the city
You think you see me, but you're wrong
You see just what I want to show you
Just look again, and I'll be gone

Under bridges, in old buildings
In the subways far below
I'm living life as I concieve it
Into the light, I rarely go

I'm off the grid, I'm a non-person
I'm a statistic and nothing more
I'm just a shadow in the shadows
I'm looking for my next big score

I see you coming from a distance
I'm gone again, before you're here
I've hiding places you won't discover
I'm on my way when you are near

I live a life beyond the reaches
Of those who want to know my name
I live my life the way I want to
To me it's only just a game

I'm off the grid, I'm a non-person
I'm a statistic and nothing more
I'm just a shadow in the shadows
I'm looking for my next big score