Need love to be so close
a comfort to surround me
need love by my side

Tell me you miss me
that it's me that you want
wipe away all the tears I cried

I desperately crave to feel
that there's no one else around us
and it's a world without lies

Wrap your arms around me
I'll stay there for a while
in this place I'll want to hide

Look into my eyes
so deep into my thoughts
there, you can abide

Know me and feel me
keep me so close
any storm we can ride

Always together exploring
searching and discovering
the amazing world so wide

I'll need nothing else
'til the end of my days
my sustenance you can provide

Any worries or fears
I'll share them I promise
in you I will confide

I'll look up to you
stand next to you so willing
my heart so full of pride

If we have to part
please make it brief
and return to me like the tide

Why can't I dream for one night
Without seeing someone's after life

Why can't I dream for one night
Without seeing someone's future in my mind

Why can't I dream for one night
Without knowing what I dream

Why can't I dream for one night
Where what I dream ~even the nightmares ~ is better than my reality

Why can't I dream for one night
*And and never wake from it again

I realized the only place I was looking for beauty was in the mirror
I looked in my heart and saw I was ugly there too
I saw something just as bad in my heart
**A mirror...

And behold I woke one morn and heard
the most glorious Sigh
and in my grief strickin state
I turned around and listened

I felt Gods presence  and knew
God had not abandoned me
in my suffering,

God had turned that Sigh into
a Beautiful Soul with  her hands
with the purple fingernails and sparklies
extended to me in Friendship,

God had not abandoned me at all
but left me with this Glorious gift
This Beautiful Sye to show me life
was still worth living,

I reached out from all my sorrow
and grabbed her hand that had become
my lifeline Blessed by God himself and
I climbed out of the darkness into the light
beckoning from her and in her
                 SYE
I started to live again!

I find that everyday's dull and grey
And I'm left to rediscover it on my own
I wake up to see the same display that I can't get rid of
I've come to see that one day everything dies
I've come to see that everyone lies
i've come to see that people just survive, and try to love to stay alive
Some just try to stay together and not fall a part
Nothing matters
Everything matters
With so little time
With so little space
Everything matters
And yet
Nothing does
Nothing matters to me but writing
Being mortal, having achievements does matter
Cause after you're dead those are the things you're remembered for
Being immortal, you have all the time in the world
up until the world ends that is (which isn't that far away in my belief)

But I am mortal
I want to be a writer to show people my age and younger that language is beautiful and is still alive
And to keep it alive!!

I may find that one day people will be too far gone and I may be in heaven or hell
*I am forsaken

I guess you could call it poetic how by the age of 12 I had no recollection of what happiness tasted like on my tongue. Some would say it was tragically beautiful.
But it was not poetic, nor was it beautiful,  but it was tragic. It was so very, very sad, and that sadness is only doubled now that people see sorrow as glorious.  It is not glorious. It is not strength. It is a lump of iron in your chest and stomach and it eats you from the inside, out and you have no right to think that blood stained wrists are anything other than tragic. So very,  very tragic.

beware when you fall in love
with an artist
be it a painter, a singer, or poet

for the artist will
paint you
with strokes and hues
in shapes of every kind

sing about you
with heartbreak lyrics
and feelings which rhyme

write about you
with the simplest words
and a secret message she wants to say

beware of the artist,
and her love
one wrong move
and you're an artwork in her display