Pay green.
All that you've seen
      this      year.
To come. . .
What's to come?
To come. . .

Got black?
Pay black.

Not black?
Get black.

Pay green.
All that you've ever
      seen      or   ever      will   see.
To come. . .
What's to come?
To come. . .

Indication. I'm a bad itch.
I'm worse than that --
I'm deliberate in
the gears that I turn,
year after year.

I'm a depressive *****
in a dark descent
from the spring spearmint
to an autumnal orange,
set in a somber sky,
to a familiar black.

This sadness is taking me over.
Blue sun is above and inside.
I haven't find five-leaved clover.
Regrets don't have end. I'm so tired.

There's no one to blame. I am useless,
Responsible for all mistakes.
Why's always my fortune so cruel?
Anxiety's hiding my face.

I wish I could blow out the fire
Of powerless anger and pain.
How quiet cries terrible liar
Knows only the night and the day.

Spin it one more time,
your story is so involving,
I
couldn't
have heard
right.

Repeat it for me,
please.

That's what I thought.

Any other day,
I'd not
say anything,
pretend I
buy your *******.
Today, I can't let it go.

I never ask.
You volunteer.
That
makes
the lying
worse.

Bother someone else,
you ******* *****.

I've traveled long roads and neighboring cities
have spent nights in unknown beds and ****** motels
I've woken up to mornings of hangovers and cigarette butts
and have fallen in love with strangers and lost travelers

I have stories that only I can recount
and a broken heart that no one is willing to repair
I've gotten used to people coming and leaving,
loving and falling out of love with me.

Because I am the girl with a lipstick stain and smudged mascara on
with an empty bottle and a flameless lighter
I am the girl who is often forgotten
mostly by the people whom I always remember.

i got addicted to you
so easily

the withdrawal
almost killed me