Sinking into the depths of your memories
For what seems like years
Only to resurface and find
You're braced against every surface
In the vicinity.
It's as if even your body realizes
Your mind is unsteady.

Getting over her is like
An addict
White knuckling their way
Through recovery.
Just when you think you're better
You get a whiff,
A glimpse,
A fleeting memory that
Breaks you and
You relapse,
Only to start again.

I thought we understood
But I looked up from my books to see
You'd turned the page in our
Relationship
And suddenly I was in a
Sinking ship
And couldn't find the life raft.

I thought you were my everything
But I took a step just to have the
Rug yanked out from under me
Falling
Time was flying when I thought it was
Creeping
And I never got enough.

It seems I took my share of you
You broke my heart like I broke yours
Both sides of the story
Unintentional
But here we are (I am) wondering what would've
Happened
If I'd put up a fight.

Over the past week I've developed a cough
And with most every breath
I can feel my chest shake and
Rattle.
Finally the sounds inside me
Match
The way I've been feeling.

You were always my sun
I told you that a thousand times before
Every morning and in nearly every poem.
You lit my life
You kept me warm
You made me happy.

Even now that you ended it
Even though I remember our last few months were rough
I can't focus on anything but the good times.
The warmth in your smile
Watching the pulse in your neck in the morning
When I was big spoon.
The way you danced when you put on make up
The way you danced when we brushed our teeth (together, always)
The way you danced your way into my heart
And danced all over it while I showed you my world
And danced to my lips so that I'd kiss you while I grinned.
You were perfect.
We were perfect.

I'm left numb and cold,
Emotionless.
But I can't hate you
Because I can't remember if or why
I should

I have to remember
That you shattered me,
My world,
and everything I knew
Just to see if I'd come running back to you.

I didn't know.
I respected your decision.
And now
I live knowing that I was presented with
The only test that mattered
And I failed.

You are everywhere
And everything
And I miss you.

I knew you were
Too good to be true.

This friendship used to be a picture perfect sunrise
But over time it has faded
And oversaturated,
And we've become blinded.
The sunrise is over,
Now time to wait for the sun to set.

Perfection
Is constant.
It’s everywhere
And in everything.
But our perception of it is not.
For us,
Perfection is fleeting.
It comes in small doses
Like a shot of tequila.
It shocks on impact
Then warms from within.
Perfection lingers
For as long as the good feeling stays.
The problem?
We know that shortly
The liquor will wear off
And the world will again be *****
Smelly
Ugly
Imperfect.

But you…
You stay.
You stay past the buzz
Past the next-morning feeling
Past the hangover
Past the fog.
You’re still here.
You’re still perfect.
Because what people don’t get is that since nothing is perfect,
Everything
Is perfect.
Perfection isn’t a shot of tequila
But a long
Tall
Drink
Of water.
Perfection is a breath of fresh air,
Or maybe even stagnant,
Because perfection
Is everywhere.
Perfection is that tree over here
That lake over there
The crazy blue streak
In that girl’s light brown hair.

Perfection
Is constant.
It’s the waves crashing
The river flowing
The clock ticking away every moment we spend together,
Glowing.

Perfection
Is your mother telling you it’s time to come home.
My father telling me to hang up the phone.
Your best friend taking a year long vacation
My history suddenly obtaining clarification.

Perfection is learning
From stupid mistakes.
Perfection is holding hands
Through all the heartaches.
Perfection is black rivers flowing down your gorgeous perfect face
And perfection is knowing there’s nothing we can’t shake.

Because perfection is there
In every code-name fight
And perfection is there
Through every sleepless night.
Perfection is present
On the drives along winding lanes
And perfection is present
When we hide from cars in vain.
Perfection is you
And perfection is me
Because through all our flaws
We’re as perfect as perfect can be.
Yet the world still doesn’t understand that
Nothing is perfection
So perfection
Is everything.