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Oct 2012 · 855
Playpark.
brooke Oct 2012
I had this dream where instead of
crows on the roof there were
cats and a dog who was friendly

The landlord discouraged my meetings and glued the door shut so
i could only look, set
wind chimes in my room to make sure
i didn't move about

but i ran fast and from
someone with green eyes who
terrified me but i didn't feel terrified

although my chest pumped
and he laughed in my face saying

I've been trying so long
to catch you
(c) Brooke Otto
Oct 2012 · 664
Falling for Steel Traps.
brooke Oct 2012
Do you want to know why
I fall for boys so easily
men so easily
they're men so easily
so easily
and I fall for their pretends
their charms on necklaces
because
I believe everything they say, they
see it in my eyes and my face, they
see all the things I want to hear and
close my eyes, it's sweet mmm mmms
i'm swaying and they're catching, i'm
a butterfly and they're the nets, then i'm a
fish and they're the boats my
eyes are wide and pleading
i thought
i thought
i thought
you were different
my big fish eyes thinking
i'm out of air, i'm tangled in fingers
your words are like burrs, steel traps
catching my feet, teeth snapping around my ankles

It's my fault.
(c) Brooke Otto
brooke Oct 2012
I would head home but
I have no home and that's okay
because I'm not the same and
all the people who
used to know me wouldn't find me
even if they tried because
they'd be looking for all the things
that made up
who I used to be
(c) Brooke Otto
Sep 2012 · 474
College.
brooke Sep 2012
I

am
being
buried
alive
by

life
(c) Brooke Otto
Sep 2012 · 772
India.
brooke Sep 2012
she is a fine cut of meat
my heart grills under the wires
she's fresh like cucumbers
(c) Brooke Otto
Sep 2012 · 322
I want to leave.
brooke Sep 2012
i like the things you do to me
that's the only reason i stay
the way you draw the water out
the way you pull my skin apart
that's the only reason i stay
(c) Brooke Otto
brooke Sep 2012
I'm sure he exists
i mean,
another like you
but for now you
are the only one
a strip of light on
the carpet in my
room, 30 minutes
away on a good
day without much
traffic and i'm
entirely horrified
by how confused
I am, my head is
all mist and tangled
string, my nose burns
with all the tears i
could cry but won't
because I already
have
most of all there are
parts of me screaming
to be acknowledged, to
let go of a hundred
things and welcome
something new but
i don't know how
i'm telling you i
don't know how and
nothing good comes
for girls like me who
are the way they are
(c) Brooke Otto
Sep 2012 · 556
Stairwell Promise.
brooke Sep 2012
For once, maybe I could feel it
straight down into my thighs
grounding my feet to the stairs with the palm of his pupils
I will skirt around the issue because I've been here before
in front of the door waiting for someone to leave
go home
laugh and play it off like trust wasn't as big
of a deal as it was
but then there it was, living between my heart and a hard place
a rawness subdued and a sourness to be dulcified

oh wait
you were serious?

telling me to slow down in less words than there
are in a look, in two eyes
speaking calms
I've never
before
seen
(c) Brooke Otto
Sep 2012 · 388
Enough.
brooke Sep 2012
Elles me disent
that if I don't try hard enough
i will never be perfect enough for anyone
but I have enough hope to have faith
that for someone I won't
have to try
at all
(c) Brooke Otto
Sep 2012 · 366
The answer is no.
brooke Sep 2012
I long to leave the loop i
weave around my legs, listless
okay, once in a while, waxed over by
candle drops, wishing water would
soothe the burn brought on by bittnerness
cooked into my skin but my body is nonporous
can nothing save me from
being too dramatic?
(c) Brooke Otto
Sep 2012 · 869
Bile.
brooke Sep 2012
******* for
being exactly what you
hated me for calling you
no I don't regret it because
it's true you
*******
you're a liar
you're a ****
you're a man
Can you tell I'm bitter?

(c) Brooke Otto
Sep 2012 · 1.6k
Primrose Water.
brooke Sep 2012
Those houses are gold across the water
citrine streaked and royally gorgeous
a bit like mermaid hair under the boats
there's a story i can't quite remember
A little boy and the sun whom he loves
every evening she'd paint the windows
for a while they'd be a splendid kind of beauty to see

'oh what wonderful things must be behind that window'

he had so much hope for things that disappeared but
never failed to return
(c) Brooke Otto
Sep 2012 · 550
Bad Guy.
brooke Sep 2012
Oh, you act like you still want to hurt me but
the truth is you're done, come on
admit that your life is going pretty well
you're a nice guy i'm sure, on the outside I guess
but we all know I've seen you naked and you don't disappoint
but that's not the point because your hands are still ashy from
all the bodies they've burned.
(c) Brooke Otto
Sep 2012 · 546
Brett.
brooke Sep 2012
Do you ever feel the innocence slip
away from every corner till
the last bit you knew was gone
the last bit that wasn't yours to preserve
wasn't yours to protect
wasn't yours to keep
as if the one person you tried to save
couldn't be saved
couldn't be saved
couldn't be saved
(c) Brooke Otto
Aug 2012 · 713
Monger.
brooke Aug 2012
You thought things were conveyed wrong?
You mean, openly admitting that you could
never be with someone without expecting them
to have *** with you?
Or that I was a
typical crazy girl
when all I wanted was for you
to come get your **** because I
didn't want it in my house anymore
You thought things were conveyed wrong?
Honey.
Babe,
Darling,
There was nothing that could have been more clear,
I don't want your grimy apologies
Aug 2012 · 911
Eight.
brooke Aug 2012
There are these christmas lights in
my room, and for a time I was bothered by the one
blue light that was out, and when I
had friends over, this friend,
she said,
Oh, but there are many lights out,
don't you see the one over there?
And here, above my head?
The one by your bookcase?
To be honest, I was a bit heartbroken to have not seen
the others, and now I can't help but notice
to count, and realize that so many of them
are dead.
(c) Brooke Otto
Aug 2012 · 768
Prick.
brooke Aug 2012
did you conquer me?
DID YOU CONQUER ME?
did you conquer me?
was this land enough?
To be pillaged, to be sought
to be taken?
Did you conquer me?
Are you happy now?
(c) Brooke Otto
Aug 2012 · 969
Untitled
brooke Aug 2012
Gone to the market
lost in the vegetable aisle
carrots, onions, zucchini
if this was him, then this is
you
(c) Brooke Otto
Aug 2012 · 382
My Own Feet
brooke Aug 2012
Push my heart aside?
to be be anyone but  myself,
what soul would i want but my own
what body but this one
(c) Brooke Otto
Aug 2012 · 792
Bear.
brooke Aug 2012
The smell of your leather belt was comforting--
rich and almost plastic-y, smooth with round notches ingrained
how many times have I fallen asleep on your stomach
lulled by bubbles and pops quarreling beneath the surface
your voice rolling through your legs, thick waves, I'm
hearing you through layers of mud and my ceiling watching
your big feet, awkward and knobby like hobbit toes
I'm trying to picture this in my mind so it stays, just
the other day I felt your hands for minutes on end to be sure
I knew the texture of your hair as well, soft in the back, abrupt before
your neck, the smell of you too
Pleasingly dank as if your dresser was wet, soaked in laundry soap and Yves Saint Laurent
soft against my lips as if I could roll them back and forth under your ear
pretending I'm only breathing but I'm teasing
and crying, you're leaving for
new mexico
(c) Brooke Otto
brooke Aug 2012
My breath was short a full lung and
although this was a dream, there was no air
there is never air where fights are concerned
this ocean was blue with black edges the
surface, entirely too far away for me to break
too much to drink, to drain, to defeat water with
hands as thin and selfish, a heart heavy holding cotton thoughts
so much weight from very little
from very little
from very little
till I tear through, fingertips breathing first
(c) Brooke Otto
Aug 2012 · 508
Hayden.
brooke Aug 2012
His friend once told me we
were
in lust

but hayden I've loved you
since I can hardly remember, there was Colorado and then
there was you, any time was a good time to be graced by your presence
I suppose you would think it's scary, to hear these things but
don't you know I would in a heartbeat, in less, in less than there is to be of
a heartbeat, I would

don't you recall all those times where the moment was only
my imagination, of course, but what did I do because you
left, and
"Nah, Dude, A lot of **** has been happening."


And there are some memories not shared,

but
there is
no lust


hayden i've loved you
since I can hardly remember
(c) Brooke Otto
Jul 2012 · 1.1k
Broken Zipper.
brooke Jul 2012
I don't admire you for
sleeping with all of our
guy friends in attempts
to somehow break your
self in for the Canadian
men that are apparently
lining up outside #302B
Green eyes at that foreign
college I'm not saying it makes
you a trollop to want to
**** everyone you can
before August ends,but
that's just saying and
you're doing,
literally
(c) Brooke Otto
Jul 2012 · 1.1k
Il te veut.
brooke Jul 2012
He is not unlike Nosferatu, alone in
company, but company nonetheless
better to be alone in numbers than none at all
He will use honey and sugar, the sunlight will assume kingdom on
his face and accede a high place in your heart, you will
love him
and so, above all else he will be
normal


but he is a ghoul, a rust upon your better
half and all your fruits will lay,
white

Il te détruira.
(c) Brooke Otto
Jul 2012 · 410
I don't know if I hate you.
brooke Jul 2012
there's a hot winter in my ears that
snows in my body
my chest crunches with ice and it all melts in my eyes
(c) Brooke Otto
Jul 2012 · 3.2k
Chocolate Cherries.
brooke Jul 2012
grated lemon sunbeams stream
through the cracked shades in my room
setting the fuzz of your hair alight, pixie grass
and your eyes shift under their almond blankets
a fan of black lashes rippling open, open
there is a flavor to your irises, the way your pupils dilate
as if, maybe, I am the sun
(c) Brooke Otto
Jul 2012 · 223
Somewhere.
brooke Jul 2012
I hope that
one day,
I too
can say
"Oh, there you are."
(c) Brooke Otto
Jul 2012 · 477
Loose.
brooke Jul 2012
Everyone picks your berries now
No cream, no honey
(c) Brooke Otto
Jul 2012 · 615
Neutral Milk Hotel
brooke Jul 2012
Your voice was lovely, deep and
rich, the high notes you couldn't
meet were merely mountains too
great but I didn't care because each
note was a depth charge bubbling
to the surface, the buzz rumbling
through your skin, not enough to
shake me, but did you soft me?oh
you must have softed me, that
which couldn't be a word is the
only way to describe such things.
(Copyright) Brooke Otto
Jul 2012 · 376
Chris.
brooke Jul 2012
If only you had
known
the only way to
make
me fall in
love
with you was to
sing
for me
Copyright 2012 Brooke Otto
Jul 2012 · 429
Break.
brooke Jul 2012
I promised myself I wouldn't give in
my resolve to be stronger than myself turned out
to be null, for one, because it almost didn't make sense in the first place

but there we were, shuffling about on the sheets like we'd never
touched before (or never bothered to touch before) which is entirely untrue
because we used to quite frequently

and I watched intently as your eyebrows caved, mouth fell open
but you refused to make any noise

So,
yes,
I squeezed it out of you.
(c) Brooke Otto
Jun 2012 · 377
Necessary.
brooke Jun 2012
I have to ask myself
am I
afraid
of
being
alone?
(c) Brooke Otto
Jun 2012 · 1.1k
Yellow.
brooke Jun 2012
I find you in my dreams because
things go better
that way
Copyright Brooke Otto 2012
Jun 2012 · 598
Coarse Fibers.
brooke Jun 2012
on fire
seems too
violent a
phrase to
describe what
kinds of things
ignite
so to speak
when i
think of
you
(c) Brooke Otto
Jun 2012 · 434
Glob.
brooke Jun 2012
Have you ever been
afraid
to
talk about
your life
as if
if you did
people might
use it
against you?
(c) Brooke Otto
Jun 2012 · 1.4k
Birch.
brooke Jun 2012
All of you
turning into devils
honey-tongued demons
swinging from trees
proclaiming their indecency to the world
irreverence clouding a sense of modesty
because if you say it out loud,
it makes it
not
as
bad...


right?
(c) Brooke Otto
Jun 2012 · 395
God.
brooke Jun 2012
If only
my self worth
could be derived
from how much
I love myself
if I did.
(c) Brooke Otto
Jun 2012 · 754
Sprint.
brooke Jun 2012
I flew today
my feet were wings and
I glided home
across the divide
(c) Brooke Otto
Jun 2012 · 928
Bread.
brooke Jun 2012
I hope I rise like yeast
like dust as
Maya Angelou
(c) Brooke Otto
Jun 2012 · 3.4k
Strawberry.
brooke Jun 2012
I don't
know
what
people
expect
from
me
(c) Brooke Otto
Jun 2012 · 799
Morning.
brooke Jun 2012
I had a dream
I awoke to my own
I made it out of a never-ending hallway where
truckers bore down on my back, I
saw the morning through a crack in the woodwork
I could breathe the air,
lay out over the trees below me
if so tangible, vivid, how not was it real?
who is to say these illusions aren't physically palpable
a photo etched over in pencil, grainy
my hands were soft and drawn
but when you wake up in a place where you sleep
you open your eyes
(c) Brooke Otto
Jun 2012 · 610
Self.
brooke Jun 2012
The difference being,
she said
was that I turned to myself
said something like
No,
we won't forget this, we
won't erase this, we
won't choose to bury your memory
whereas you
she said
I was Nagasaki,
I was Hiroshima
and you
she said
she said, sitting up
but then she
sat back and
went silent
(c) Brooke Otto
Jun 2012 · 647
Rollerblade.
brooke Jun 2012
The things
we reserve for
people we don't know
(c) Brooke Otto
Jun 2012 · 994
Slope.
brooke Jun 2012
I see,
when I look at her that
everything is so smooth and
without hindrance
taut, I suppose
whereas when I try
like that
I am crooked and unappealing
there is no equivalent in
my world that can compare
to her
i could never be
appropriately pretty
for you
(c) Brooke Otto
Jun 2012 · 327
Lately.
brooke Jun 2012
My dad said
there was
a hole
and the girl
was the grain of
sand
but i feel
like a canyon and
the wind hollows me
out
(c) Brooke Otto
Jun 2012 · 572
Crinkle.
brooke Jun 2012
I'm standing at the departure gate
and the world is all before me, the
flight is leaving and I have two ways I could be going
I'm standing there in my best dress, in my heels
with my hair done up just like you taught me
with my shoulders back, just like that?
the flight is leaving, the flight is leaving
the flight is leaving
(c) Brooke Otto
Jun 2012 · 662
Haystack.
brooke Jun 2012
I had a dream we
kissed and you ****** the air
out of my lungs, said you were in trouble
oh, but it was a dream, I was in no wrong so
I kissed you again, gave it back
(c) Brooke Otto
May 2012 · 355
Understood.
brooke May 2012
Have you ever
made your
peace
by speaking
and to no
avail did they
respond?
(c) Brooke Otto
May 2012 · 372
A girl
brooke May 2012
The bees
call her
a flower
(c) Brooke Otto
May 2012 · 1.5k
Leeks.
brooke May 2012
Around that time is when  you told me
I prefer pale skinned women
as opposed to me, I'm a little bit too olive for
your tastes, atlas shrugged and geometric circle
tattoos
I would get a heart, right below my thumb
how juvenile, you're thinking

and you described your father's death behind your house,
how Wendy's voice broke your silence, but you
were so calm and that night you made Basil Palmiers, a little
too flaky, with a cigar amidst the coroner who spoke
hush hush

as if you couldn't take the news, a devastated son cooking dinner,
the wine,
magnificent.
(c) Brooke Otto
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