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i apologize
fighting to find
fair rationale
that may contrast
the way i justify
the foolishness
of continuing
to provide
abode for this weight
when all it has
is novel means
of snapping my back

suffice it to say
my tolerance for pain
lies in a plain land
far far away
blanketed
on the outskirts

i will implore
should the scene need
for you to believe me
if nothing else
i’ve learned to suppress
my dignity
transiently

the only fear
is that it discover
the relief
of the darkness
under covers

- end
I’d known of the cave beneath the cliff
For a year, or maybe more,
And I’d often said to Jill, ‘What if…’
But we’d not been there before.
It was only at the lowest tide
That the entrance could be seen,
We’d have to dive, to swim inside
And for that, Jill wasn’t keen.

For the cave lay in a tiny cove
With towering cliffs above,
‘So how are we going to get down there,
To swim,’ said Jill, ‘my love,’
We’ll hire a boat and we’ll cruise around
With our gear, from Canning Bay,
Which is what we did with our scuba tanks
On a fresh, mid-winter day.

It took a couple of hours or more
To get to the favoured spot,
The sea was calm, we secured the boat
Next to a giant rock,
Then over the side we went, and swam
Toward that narrow gap,
Then dived below with the tidal flow
There was just the one mishap.

Jill caught her tank on the overhang
And it nicked her feeder hose,
She still had air, but I had to stare
As a stream of bubbles rose,
We swam right into the inner cave
Where the roof gave us more height,
So up we came to the air again
And I lit my small flashlight.

The walls reflected the sudden beam
In a thousand different ways,
There were reds and greens, and even cream
In a host of coloured sprays,
Then further on as we swam along
Was a ledge we clambered on,’
And there the bones of a longboat lay
From a time, both dead and gone.

And further in was a pile of bones
Of some poor, benighted soul,
Caught in hell in this prison cell
When the tide began to roll,
He must have come when the tide was low
And sailed in through the gap,
Then stayed too late, there was no escape
Once the tide had closed the trap.

And close by him lay an iron chest
With its bands all rusted through,
Full of coins, of gold Moidores
And Spanish Dollars too.
But Jill became so excited by
The glitter of the stuff,
That she’d forgotten the fractured hose,
Or to turn her Oxy off.

I played the light up above the bones
Where a script was scratched in the wall,
‘God help me, I was cast in here
By the crew of the ‘One for All,’
They told me to hide the treasure here
And would pick me up at eleven,
But then the entrance disappeared,’
It was ‘1797.’

Jill’s tank was empty when we looked,
So I said I’d leave her there,
Go back and pick up another tank
But her face was filled with fear.
It’s been a week since I left her there
For the sea’s blown up, as well,
And the entrance to the cave has gone
Under a ten foot swell.

I’d give all the coin, and gold doubloons
Just to get my woman back,
But there’s been a great white pointer there,
I’m afraid of a shark attack.
If she just can last till the sea goes down
I shall go to that awful cave,
But the thought I’ve fought since I left her there,
‘It may be my woman’s grave.’

David Lewis Paget
It must have been late autumn,
though I was too young, so I can't be sure.
And while most would remember a grown man cry,
I only recall the lack of tears.
It must have been late autumn,
or else why the demand for firewood,
and the repeated chop of the axe?
Until it missed.
Down to the bone, possibly a scream,
but no tears...
"Why aren't you crying, Daddy? Doesn't it hurt?"
I remember considering him the strongest man this world has to offer.
And it could be true in a physical sense.
But its not really about the body, is it?

Now I don't remember the season, but I remember the pain.
Of course, not his pain; but ours.
They left the night before for the operating room.
And left us to be alone that morning.
It's not often you sense the love between endlessly quarreling brother and sister.
But it's there. And it surfaced.
And its not often you see a grown man cry.
But the tears are there. And they surfaced.
The fear of losing a brother; a son.
Not someone else, not another soul to leave him:
I could hear his pleas beyond his rambling words.
So it's not really about the body, is it..?

It happened almost 12 years prior,
but photos seem to bring back everything, don't they?
And as I flipped through the pages of that tattered album,
I pointed out one to him.
But his eyes focused on a different picture entirely.
Only a few memories of that man reside in the corners of my mind.
But there he was, with me in his arms,
smiling as if he could never be sad.
But a family holds its secrets, and he became the biggest one.
Why are you crying, Daddy? Does it still hurt?
After all of these years - of course.
It's the memories, the soul, the breaking heart.
Its the love, and the love that was taken away, and the family.
And I believe this was the silent lesson I learned through a grown man's tears.
That it's not really about the body.
The birds have returned
And peace emerges
In the form of a dove.
Life on the rise again
Children living normal
Lives once more
Playing in fields
Like they did before.
The deadly dark cloud
Replaced by bright sunny skies
Erasing memories of the past
Painting the world with new colours
The rising tide of hope
Washes away the fear of war.
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