Tell me!
Why do I always open up.
Be the first to always fall in love.
Go my way or do it just because.
Tell me!!
Why do I like a person that will laugh to much,
Lay on my chest and say some deep stuff...that makes me smile as I open up.

Please!! Tell me is there anyone that's looking for a one that will hold you and whisper stupid junk that makes you smile and will open up!!

So my Ex is going out with one of my Friend's Ex and it's so weird because we been talking before i even met him and before he even met his...
they never knew each other it just happend man it's been a weird moment for me and him and how we found out was odd to, We been talking bout our break ups and never traded pictures with each other so i never seen his ex and he never seen mine until 1 day ago i showed him my ex is still using my last name! I KNOW..cray cray idk what to do anymore cause i always felt like i've wanted him back but this literally is like the most weirdest thing ever and i try my best not to think of us but i do but now...like NOOOOW i'm sooo out of it it's so weird..oh ..ooo i gotta go now but i will keep you updated.


Sincerly,
ZEAL'S LIFE.

I’m doing everything that I can
Giving everything that I am
In return I just want your face in a frame
Don’t give up and no games
I want the love that most appreciate

Thank you for giving me time,
And a plate.
Your shoes and this place,
It's soo great.
I've learned that threw thick and then
The smallest to the biggest.
We all have beautiful difference.

I know that don't make sense but I just wanted to say I love you guys and thank you.

Where should i begin?
Losing my Ego I see how the Birds fly threw the wind.
Where should I start?
Winning my Joy threw the Days where i thought my Mind wouldn't Mind to be Mindful.

When I say i think to much take it as a compliment Cause i think of you with excellence.
I tried to be perfect  but threw the past mirror the only thing that reflects is imperfection.
And thats when i think of your tears threw the night, who am i to hold you in mind  and all i see is your smile and I'm.....I'm Thankful.

Slow steps turned to strides
And his eyes turned into piercing fire until they turned white.
I could see it every passing day
His hands wasn’t shaking no more
And his heart wasn’t on his sleeve
The shackles they used to pierce his worth was now his armor.
I heard from the crowd “How…did he do that.
As he jumped as high as he could and with a loud thump! To the ground!
He got up and bowed his head
And with a quick turn to the mirror he looked at me with a look I never seen before
He smiled.
I whispered with a tear in the corner of my eye I said
“Go…As high as you can”
The ground started to shake and the wind dance between his feet!
And that was the last time I saw him.
That was the last time I saw…me

Listen he can Love you all night but you will never see him in the morning.
I'm not going there for your tears..
Why can't you see your not his..?
Wishing on him for years
Have he even met your piers?
All you can say to me is you love his hair..

Looking in the mirror there he is there he goes,
Man I need to get my stuff together.

Is it over or has it just began
Are we moving or standing still
Not numb but not intense
Just us
That’s just it
Nothing but moment cause we both know how to burn down a city with just one kiss..
Let’s just cuddle and watch something that fits the description.
There you will find me and you just vibing to the sound of movie that were not even watching just to feel your skin on my skin…
And it’s just us
That’s just it
And I’m finding out
I love this ****

It's scares me that i think of you to much,
gotta new generation but i know it got a "but" and a "well"
and "your thinking to much".
am I thinking to much?
I'm not thinking enough.
according to the ones that's never thinking of...well..umm..
But you can't just walk out?!
okay..I'm thinking to much..am I thinking to much?
HAHAH ***
i hate when people walk out that i thought was suppose to mess things up
but they actually help you and clean you up before they fall in oblivious Love...
but then you realize....
I hate messing things up,
and It's to late I'm falling in Oblivion's Love.

I've been a victim of your schedule
But I didn't mind it..that means I stop thinking about everything you say and your motives behind it.
To tell the truth I'm hurt behind it but even you can be open with your bestest friend and still be distant.
When I come I'm thinking heck yea were gunna chill and laugh at the stupid remarks were sayin, but all those get cut off when I know it's time when that phone rings and my smile gets lost in " Hey let's go do something".....
Is it weird for me to fill this way about the situation? Is it me...do you really wanna hang or just go somewhere where they still don't pay you no appreciation?
I think I'm just rebound friend sometimes .... You know what I'm saying?
And tonight really set me back to be honest.. When you lied infront of my face and said I can't spend a night over ...
Maybe it's for the best and maybe this is just my conclusion.

When you said you was gunna call me so we can help me threw my verse with this song ...Dude! It's
10:50 now I hardly doubt that.
I hardly doubt this.
I doubt you will be right back...

I had a dream about him again.
Somewhere between the darkness and Sands of time,
Sometimes darkness has land mines
But I don’t mind I don’t truely think he’s even thinking of me…. Right ?

I had a phone so I called him one last time,
Isn’t it something that you can remember certain parts of yesterday ?
Yet today feels like the same day until you have dream of the parts you had long time ago … right ?

I bowed my knees today.
It’s something to gaze at the stars and rethink every morning what God has to say
The deeper I go the higher my sins lift me up with grace.
No more questioning cause if I never be with someone down here under space, I would love to be purified and found speaking with the father that created this heart that so easily awaits for Love today…

His head thinks 80 miles an hour
His hands are still like water on a sunny day
Looking back is easier when you’re only retracing your steps..
He’s been here before looking at the same beast
The blood in his veins runs smoothly
As the bird sings he gears up for war.
As the beast awakes he grips his sword and looks down for the last time...

He faces love one more time.

Taking the chance is not physics
Renting a heart is expensive
I rather you want to come then me summoning your presence.
After all this you will be the one begging for my intelligence
I can see it I’ve sworn my love
And every morning I’m impressing my benevolence...
And it ask me again
“How far will you bow to a prince when you’re a king.?”
And I say to it
“Cause this is not about kingdoms ...this is about showing someone He is truely a walking trophy.”
You are my trophy

I bet you’re not even worried
You miles away and I been right here
Waiting ... kicking the rocks
Waiting ... building blocks
Waiting ... feeling distraught
Feeling so lost , feelings so lost
Thrusting my my eyes and walking these blocks
Kicking these rocks keeping these rocks
Throwing them at the stars
Earth has never felt so cold ...I swear .

I feel weird
Like the world just stopped spinning
I feel naked
Like the towel been snatched from me
I feel real
Like I’ve done something and waiting isn’t helping
I feel...
Like bad love song or the Day after Tomorrow where Tom cruise woke up on the same day and notice that he was gunna have to die today.
Trying to keep the women he loved from dying and he seen this play out a billion times but couldn’t do anything bout it.

I feel like silence
I feel nothing I can’t feel
Wait ...
What were you saying ?

Voice like rain, Strong like thunder
Every word captures me and hold me so tender.
Like mom or father a friend to his lover.
Going threw my whole being it's like you knew me before it was all over..

Tangled in life tied by chains asking for more I heard you calling me everything seemed to fade away when you called my Name.

..."hello"?

...here I am it is me your beloved one.

I am the one who blew the wind between your trees
Just to see if you would stay grounded.
Like a cheetah low to the ground waiting for his prey to get closer
I’m waiting for you to kneel and know that it’s over…
Your hugs were precious but me being possessive I want more
I smell blood and your smile is becoming my  aroma
But how do I feel so better in your chaos and the way you hate me….
Like a criminal waiting for his cell doors to close
Do I really wanna be saved by my own  meticulous act?
Do I …

It's my fault when I think about it my fault when I reread revault the lock and find out the truth what's new? Who knew the loop of you was me twisted and untwist the things that was in it I'm seasick I done it I did it this sandcastle I build it and spit in it and poured water on it it's done its finish I don't wanna re live or fight over something that I wanted to forget it forget about it FORGET IT FORGET ABOUT  IT FORGET ABOUT IT!!

Don't wanna be on earth...this is just to low.
Taking chances that will hurt....the mask won't let them know.
But tonight will hold my last cry, my heart will fight for truth.

Funny how they become your only thought
And now I’m laughing for what?
You can turn my love into I don’t give a ****

I wanna keep you close cause if I keep you  far
Inches turn to miles and I’m not miles from the bar.

What you inches from?
Would you cover miles ?
Would you come to me if I was feeling down?
Would you tell me the truth?
Do I make you smile ?
Is there anybody else other then me that you seeing now?

When I ignore you thats when I think of you the most.

My friends say I'm in to deep...
Some nights I think im not but this night I learned that I can't breath...

Without you
Oh God I need you and it's crazy cause you chose me and I don't think you even needed me.

Rushing like water the Sun light drips on me..
All the days that we had was the word slow but now it change to suddenly.
Bubbling thoughts of I don't want to go back to who i was..... basically.

When you’re falling from heaven they forget to tell you how you’re praised by the same ones that will talk about you.
All the care in the world but do they really care about you,
I pluck the dead feathers until I don’t have’em any more.
There’s a funny sound that I hear in my chest that keeps beating day after day it gets louder,
And the craziest thing I stop levitating.
I can’t walk on water no more!
And the wind use to listen to my whistle!

So much pain
So much hurt
It’s hot down here
So I hide behind a rock
I look for shade
I look for love
Things have change
But why does it feel like change don’t even want us ?
And yet some praise superman for how he can bend a lock
I should go to him to see if he know about this heart stuff.

Days like these the dollar don't matter
Days like these your hating the leather
Days like these you look over shoulders.
Nights like these the money is right
Nights like these the fashion is white
Nights like these you **** for your life.

I'm on fire and my walls are broken down my face falls as my knees crumble to the ground. RAID me God!! Raid me ...

Is
Am
I?

Such wrong words but words can words express what I deserve?

What I heard is echoes of my own voice in a Hurd full of nerves that want to be released out of my words...

First I...well secondly....no no this will prolly be the third, where I'm fulling and filling in the feelings of a per-son.

Seeing you leave is like wind threw a hot day. Does that make sense? Cause you come and blow but I need sense cause this is not it.

Wait
Stop
Hold on! As I've become a puzzle piece to the forgotten

And I'm fine with it

They speak of a mutant that can control the trees
Hhmm sounds like fema
They speak of a Man that can jump from one city to the next in a second ...
Hhhmm sounds like iPhone 7 to me
They speak of hell is hot
But the meant that the sun is heaven
I’m not saying there lying I’m saying in my generation there twisting the truth
Like DNA STRANDS ....
DNA strands ..mortal men fooling mortal men
Calling it a cure or the next big thing when there killing a whole generation to create billions clones to create a utopia that won’t even have souls in the end.

I heard of a place beyond the clouds
Where he who sits is a savior
That died wretched death but it was only for me
And I heard beneath me something so beautiful and fierce yet speaks like a dragon and slithers like serpent.
And as I think  I hear a calling
And as I hear a calling I sense my body backing away
Gravity has me confused my love
This shirt is too tight
And these pants are so expensive
My skin feels weird
And my heart seems as if it’s dying to keep me alive.
I just don’t wanna lose that voice who hears my cry at my desperation.
Cause I’m desperately sinking

Hey, what’s your name
My name is happiness
I’m only here for a moment...
If you were looking for Love he’s down the street.
Be cautious I heard joy said he’s on vacation so i don’t know if he’s home but you can go see man okie bye

The taste of trust is sweet
Your smile I hold dearly
Out the mouth you speak but I can only comprehend the heartbeat.
The boy has a gift and I'm trying to read the instructions of life So I can't but help sometimes look in your dreams there you will find where desires come from...
Lub-dub-lub-dub

who am I?

Like a grain of sand on the shore?
Or the waves that holds it's Course?

Who am I?

The man I choose to be?
Or am I possessed by Love and it's Deeds?

Who am I to Speak?

With the worst past ever,
to speak in the presence of a Holy Endevor..

Who am I to Walk?

Down The streets of Gold,
Or the Ghetto where the Smile a kid touches me like soft petals.

I'm great full for who i am and whatever reason i was made..to know that is there is a Creator who loves me is better on the days that i feel like dirt.

But whatever reason i live when i remember of what you have made I consider myself and for that i praise

Level of conviction
My voice is so silent
My mind is yielding
My heart becoming radiant.

And so the pattern of this world is hating him.
Hating me without cause
My friends there to dark now
My room has lifted without even touching a cloud.
Heavenly host just walks right in then go out.
While demons skirm just to be let down.
Zeal is here trying to endure this night with no "burst" out.

So he rights a verse couple of songs and poems then he lays down.

I don't hear nothing except being loving before they take him out.

I think I'm tripping on something,
Maybe it's just nothing.
Use to be so close but now we fall apart,
Tell me what I don't wanna hear
Push me until I need a breath of fresh air,
There's a million reasons why I should just leave you in tears.
But my heart won't let you fall-a-a-a-all.

I'll love you threw it all-a--a-all

A glass of milk by his bed it keeps him a float.
All these years I stretched like a rubber band tied to a boat ..
It's about to pop and I'm still trying to pedal my way to a foundation of better heights.

Use to write a song but now the beat just plays me.

Flirting with the mic I can see it wanna kiss me.

It's getting kinda intimate how my poems hold me

Leaving my brain on a page that's oral you see...

******* gave me keys to city,
Drinking all my words the pencil told me to "marry me"...

If Man Came from heaven and heaven that means Heaven will  embrace Himself..
then women really did come from man wouldn't it make  it reasonable and accepted that Man will be conceived by woman?
Breath it self is Living in words in a body the functions it needs living because it keeps redifying itself.
Atheist and christians are identical when they say the are not the same  faith of wealth but there existence is a intellegent quest.
Why would you make a Human that Don't believe In any remark of Humanity acceptance? And the atheist a genelogy worth of cells perfecting it self? Both have a blood issue and there genes know full well that there is something that Keeps wondering Into there Cells.

The Identical is Formed The  Difference creates itself but tell me what is so different between the Rocks and the Shells your Heart and My health? The approval Of men in other words Fame it self...
what Is identical i believe is the samething that will tell us about ourself cells.

It's like nobody needs me anymore I have become the get around guy
You kno the friend that drops you off from place to place.

But what if I disappeared
What If I didn't call back
What if I dispear?

Sounds like a plan

Meet you in the 6 where it's so so Cold,
Meet You in Texas where oh so low
Meet me in the grave where my  love can't go.
Meet me in the heights where I should my soul,
If I go to hell you are there fosho.

Where would I go that you will not go
Oh so faithful more faithful then the Sun you woke.
Lust is where I reside I know my habits is unknown I'm tired of letting go...
Can you still save me from the man I've become ?

Oh I feel the humility as I sink inside my chair hang my head before who came as they all watch and move on, I'm drained my dear...
I'm the one in the spot light breeze my mom will meet up with me as we discuss my life of greed and failures that I won't speak of,
I fight my tears...
They came to get my car my friend
I'm lost without a job again
Entangled from the man I've been
Entangled from me..
I'm losing heart my love is dim
They came to get my ...
Losing everyone of my friends
Time and all the distance
She's coming to get me...
I pray you catch listening in..
I pray you catch me

Outside are dogs and they biting BeCause they remember I fed them
They yell slurs like who’s begging ?
Come outside cause I’m ready
Oh lord God am I ready?
Oh my Lord there’s to many
My stomach turns from my past
My head sits and it’s heavy
All my sins cry like you managed
In his room going crazy…
In my blood I have secrets
Secrets that turn in my belly
Oh my Lord forgive xelle
Oh my lord forgive Christian
Oh my God are you ready ?
I spilled mercies and babies
All these thoughts please save the good parts of me for you ….
Too you
Who knew …
Who knew …

Freedom from my self would be the sweetest rest I ever known.

Painting words can you see what I'm drawn to?

My eyes are lifting and gravity is saying "farwell".

Here in the dark I see the brightest of light,
As I look closely it looks like lightbulb with sword bigger then mine?!
The locust feed on me by the wounds where the strike.
Fighting lust will give you some bruise but I ...look toward this marvelous light as it comes defeating and crushing witches and sorcerers behind me.
And then it happened.....

I can hardly breath the face of horsemen,
The fear grips me his arrows have touched me.
I lay as the vampires bite me the demons they taunt the nephelims kick me.
As all of my enemies have blood on there hands from the wound when death struck me.
I look to this light as he looks towards me...
I can feel my heart stop
My eyes are rolling
He runs HE RUNS TO ME...
I can sense the fear fading the demons stop talking the nephelims run the vampire are burning I'm dead but where is his sting? As he tells me get up our hands reach I tell him save me!
He pulls out of his mouth words that says "BELIEVE IN ME".

....

...suddenly! I arose with a strength that was greater then me,
Seeing my body there I didn't question I had a thirst of defeating my enemies.
My sword was my mouth the clouds were *******...
More then conquerers fought right beside me!!
Amen the shouted as my lips embraced "thank you for Saving me"
A scroll walked carefully wanting me to read and see

"20156661241IZCOMDOENTWARRYBLIVENME"

I love to drink a glass of soil.
The clouds will sing which makes them royal.
They rain on imperfect man the trust less bodies the souls that are loyal.

I sit to watch the perfect storm,
The moon is red the wind is horrible.
I see a horse that haven't ate,
The one that rides without face.
Behind him hell and all it's  gates,
I stand to watch them crumble this place.
My helmets on I strap my breast plate,
I behold the sun as it shines bright on my cape.
My sword is firm my boots are tight..
I look at my loved ones one more time
I feed my cat one more time
I felt the wind one last time
I drop my eyes one last time.
Lord knows for this I was ready,
If this is the death of me, I'll stand to fight with the rest of me.
A thousand warriors looking towards what I see.
I open my eyes and see the angels fighting with me.

Why am I chasing a face that’s seen me cry
It’s like Kissing the life into something that’s already died
Slowly I twist in the day then unwind at night
You say your coming back in power with all of your might..
But Im trying to belive in you like you were Jesus Christ.
And nothing was the same
And nobody was to blame
I hear if you loved someone you will want to be with them no matter what
How did I become the joke
How did I become the joke

I hope that i can turn back the time where i can see your face
the only Girl that never had a chance cause I'm oblivious to my ways
I don't know whats wrong,
My heart is like the Sun's rays Giving off light but when the clouds come i hide my Love but i need somebody in the frame watching my brothers grow up is I'll See and like the Sea I'm need of a drift someone that can keep my head up..
"Can We ...we keep keep each other company? oh company.
a Justin bieber song feel heavy in this nice weather
what if i sell my soul then i won't have a leg to stand on I'll be having millions to walk on i believe thats why I'm still alone.
So peaceful yet So alone
So Me yet I don't know
So simple yet complicated all  I want is for someone to walk with in the mall
how many men do you know work for them self?
On a Island but i rather be Home
A Liger with all my desires but my heart is like the Pacific
Watch how i smile at the Birds I wonder sometimes if that was you sending me Messages where ever you are I captured your birds just to see if would visit.

I like the way you hold my hand,
The way you try not to smile on Skype
The cuddles before you gotta go to school,
The awkward things you do I like.
But the thing is while we look up in different views of the sky.
The morning text and why I don't reply...
Is because I want you in my arms on this starry night.

When you see the rejection coming  you just sit before they even push you down.

While I sit I focus on the wind that flows threw the ****** grass, many faces around me but I smile to the one that stands in shock as they take knife out I look to the heavens.

Waking up everyday knowing how you care.
It's like a  pillow or the ammo that I need to get out of here.
Can I be honest to a God that know what I will say?
I love you and I need you even though my love reaks of who I appear....to be.
I'm 21 and it's killing me that I'm betting on things that's not even a Good sight to see.
Good sides to me is the worst when they come to me and find out I'm not who they thought or cracked up to be...
My head runs like the waves in the sea,
Never terrified cause I scare myself of who I'm going to be.
If I am a King it's only because one lives in me, I'm becoming something that they don't want me to be something all you need, everything that's really killing me ...thank you and I love you sencerely the Man I need me to be.

So if you want something to hold on to gotta find it first ...but here I am.

Cause I’ve been laying under sunsets
Walking into my dreams
asking where are you friend!
dying in the silence
Watching carefully Oh yes I’ve been
Waiting for you to say YES!
Yes to me ..
say yes too me

Waking up to a familar taste,
5 inches is growing from 5 cetimeters away.
My eyes beholding the wickedness my hands say.
Silently swiftly I put my hands in ur Gaze.
Hungry for selfishness tonight I watch our friendship almost hang.
Yet I still watch you hang from 5 cetimeters away.
Blushing while you was awake I saw your cheeks red when I trusted you with eye view of my private things.
I feel like the worst if you wake up and tell me you felt everything.
Then again why didn't you stop me cause your eyes couldn't stop from turning away ...
It's amazing but  not amazed but I'm a maze, trapped in my own private things .