I am not supposed to want you
Yet I reminisce of our night
The shudder that overcame me
From touches so light
The caress of my cheek
The passion of your kiss
Too genuine a gaze
I became trapped within
I harbor such a secret
I desire your slightest strokes
While temptation tugs at my wishes innermost
Powerless against my arousal
How can I keep this contained?
I am not supposed to want you...
I am NOT supposed to want you!
...But I cannot do without you.
Do you want me the same?

I can barely stand
The nearness of you.

Your sleeping body shifts
And you capture me with slumbering arms.
The warm breath at the back of my neck
Melts the frozen parts of me,
But there is no use for a lukewarm heart.

Can't you see how your fingertips linger
Or how you scorch me with the warmth of your skin?
This closeness could be the end of me.

You, all of you,
Eyes like chocolate
And lips like strawberries,
I want it all.

And your touch
Is driving me mad.

If I bled words
What a beautiful tragedy my death would be.
The bloodiness of murderous verse
Slowly coursing from still veins,
Fascination ensued by the deep redness of my shade
Read me like the deadliest novella.
My corpse dispenses rhyme after rhyme
Slowly seeping into oblivion as time flows by
Smearing the floor with my everlasting essence
The sincerity of my words permanently staining the carpet
Frozen over gaze as you capture the look in my eyes
Holding on to seconds of life as time drifts by
Alone but leaving behind trails of divinity
A beautiful death as I lie, I die bleeding profound poetry.

There is something to be said
For a hideousness so potent
That mirrors are perhaps an enemy
Or something to be avoided.

There is something to be said
For a self-esteem so insubstantial
Not even the most excessive false bragging
Can repair a single shamble.

There is something to be said
For a weight so displeasing
That the scale can cause a panic attack
Cheats heaving, troubled breathing.

There is something to be said
For a body so scarred
Not even summer can shorten the sleeves
Or remove the stiff collar.

There is something to be said
For a voice so deep yet not quiet
That it jars the ears, scathes the mind
Until it simply remains silent.

There is something to be said
For a boredom so immense
Not life or love or fun
Can spark a sliver of ambition.

There is something to be said
For apathy of so great a measure
That the thought of suicide
Simply requires too much effort.

There is something to be said
For a face makeup cannot beautify
Not even when applied heavily
Does it become pleasing to the eye.

There is something to be said
For a personality like a punch to the gut
That changes constantly yet remains unpleasant
Mimicking every emotion, save love.

There is something to be said
For a complete waste of space and air; see
Not to be around the bush, it's easier to say:
There is something to be said for me.

Burning pleasure with each swallow
I love the way you taste.
Eradicate the stress.
Numb the pain.

In search for freedom
Steps to intoxication I take
Consumed in reflection
With each swig memories fade.

No matter the quantity internally vacant I remain.
How many more sips
How many more shots
For the remnants to trail away?

Ethanol
My aching addiction
Course through my veins
Life is nil without you.

Unable to remember
Questioning what was said
Passively expelling secrets
Drunkenly fearless I am.

Drowsiness imminent
Slurred speech
Coordination weak
Emotions wavering

Artery pressure low
Heartbeat delayed
Thoughts sway
Respirations slow.

Inhibitions lessen
Concentration impaired
Reflexes diminish
Hangover in the distance

Another day
Another drink
Inevitably it happens.
I succumb again.

Time reverses the inebriated.
If only time could annul the loss in me.
Subdue the recollections.
Until then sobriety is not for me...