The rain outside is pouring down
And slowly lifting is this frown
I love the pitter patter sound
And the mud it makes as it hits the ground
I joyfully go out in it and dance around
There is just no better feeling to be found

I'll give you the knife and show you how to hurt me where to cut deep
I give you my love, and my trust
I'll tell you all the secrets I keep
I pray you love me just as much
Your love I want to reap
So please don't use that knife, don't ******

Because you could rip me apart
I am trusting in you
Not to cut out my heart
For I would bleed out, and death would ensue
For I have loved you from the very start
Please baby don't leave me cold and blue

Don't look into her eye's they are no longer dim
A new light has been replaced in them
And it's a white hot fire
Something she thought she would never acquire

Now if you fall she won't help you up
She threw away that cup
Now she'll just laugh at the pain in your face
She'll stomp you down farther in your miserable place

Humanity finally has had it's way
She changed in a fraction of a day
All those that thought they knew her
Would of never thought this drastic change would occur

But she was done with being used, and abused
Now she just watched others suffering, to her it amused

But her friends did what the demons and monsters never could
They turned their backs on her, she never thought they would
So now that shattered heart of gold
She pulverized to to dust, let it freeze over, let it become cold

Now she hopes they all feel the pain she endures
She will not help with the strain, she smiles for there is no cure

Helping others never last
She quickly learned to become an ***
With all the good she tried to spread
Never returned to her, there was only dread
Now she doesn't care, before long her old self will be dead

Lips so red
Corpse so blue
Lips whispers quite
Corpse remains silent
Lips cry in despair
Corpse doesn't care
Lips become still
Corpse welcomes her will

When I die and go away
All I want is sweet decay
No Heavenly violins or strumming harp
All I want is pitch black dark
No streets of gold
My pain it could never hold
No pearly beautiful gates
Gates belong on cages and crates
So please my loving God, take me off your list
I just no longer want to exist

©Pauline Russell

You call
Leave a message
"I'm in a fall"
Terrifying presage
"I ****** up"
Pulse quickens
"Drunk from deaths cup"
Blood thickens
"I've took to many"
Stomachs turning
"My prognosis is deadly"
Heart burning
"I love you friend"
Hands shaking
"This I did not intend"
Dialing faster
Message over
No answer

You call
Leave a message
"I'm in a fall"
Terrifying presage
"I ****** up"
Pulse quickens
"Drunk from deaths cup"
Blood thickens
"I've took to many"
Stomachs turning
"My prognosis is deadly"
Heart burning
"I love you friend"
Hands shaking
"This I did not intend"
Dialing faster
Message over
No answer

I can't help it let the true be told
I can't help it if the mirror's cold
I can't help it that the reflection's changed
I can't help it if I'm not the same
I can't help it so little remains
I can't help it tormented by the pain
I can't help it I'm almost gone
I can't help it, it's all gone wrong
I can't help it what's  been stole
I can't help it the mirror's cold

Monkey's awake
Crawling on in
Just under the skin
He start to rake

Throw the switch
Hands start shaking
Feel the quaking
A growing itch

Self control wanes
He always wins
Know how it ends
With me not sane

I'm going out to face the monster
She has hollow eyes and drool on her lip
I summons up all the courage I can foster
I'll stand tall and shoot straight from the hip

It stares at me with a snarl on it's snout
It's teeth are sharp they mean to pierce
I can't help but wonder what this farce is all about
Because this beast is looking mighty fierce

I slowly edge my way to the bag
It stares at me intensely
I'm hoping my steps don't lag
It's appetite is immensely

I pour the food into the bowl
Her tail starts waging like hell
I had reached my goal
Now my dog will have to wait for the next dinner bell

There is a monster under your bed
With teeth razor sharp, eyes of glowing red
And every time you lay down your sweet head

He slips into your mind
Your beautiful dreams is what he finds
And with them he reassigns

He turns them all to nightmares
He wants you in despair
Showing you the greatest of terrors

It gives him the greatest rush
When your so scared, your voice is hushed
With your legs all turned to slush

In your dearms he loves to hop
To make you flip and flop
On your sweetest dreams he just chops

Every night you'll find him there
Waiting to bring you only despair
******* from your lungs the air

Showing you things that can be done
We really has lots of fun
Have you staring down the barrel of a Gatling gun

So I suggest after your daily bread
Before you scurry off to bed
You make sure all your prayers are said

There is no avoiding this nasty monster
For all your fears he fosters
All of your demons he will conjure
He'll make sure when he's through, You'll need a psychiatric doctor.

As the sun creases my eyes open
It ignites, starts an explosion
It continues the erosion
Inside my head
It all turns red
It's where it's bled

I shake the cobwebs from my head
Looking into the future with dread
New tragic things will come my way
Try as I might to keep it all at bay

The residue from last night's dream
The echo of my screams
The bright warm sunbeams
Can not chase away
The thoughts of the day
Where my demon play

I live a life where smiles are miracles
Happiness is only mythical
It all leaves me cold and miserable
Guess that's why I'm so cynical
All I really want is a life that's livable


So good morning people, don't mean to sound cynical
Hope your treasures safe from criminals
I hope your day is winnable

Start of the day
I'm already in the sway
Standing on the edge
Of my life's little ledge
Standing here debating
My life I'm rating
Should I stay and fight
Just for another agonizing night
Or should I take flight
Open up my arms, let the air rush by
As I fall into the sky
Yes it's just the morning
But my mind's already storming

As the sun creases my eyes open
It ignites, starts an explosion
It continues the erosion
Inside my head
It all turns red
It's where it's bled

I shake the cobwebs from my head
Looking into the future with dread
New tragic things will come my way
Try as I might to keep it all at bay

The residue from last night's dream
The echo of my screams
The bright warm sunbeams
Can not chase away
The thoughts of the day
Where my demon play

I live a life where smiles are miracles
Happiness is only mythical
It all leaves me cold and miserable
Guess that's why I'm so cynical
All I really want is a life that's livable

I wrote you this note
So you could cope
I ended my life
With a sharpened knife
It was selfish I admit
But I don't regret it

You tried to make me belive that lie
Things would get better....(sigh)
I've lived many years
And everyday i fear
More bad days than good
So I did what I should

I will love you all forever
Please never dobut that whatsoever
I leave you my love and our memories
And everywhere you go you'll find pennies

Will we meet upon the green grass hill
Will you come and sit with me still
Underneath the old oak tree
We can sit and gaze at the sea
We can watch the white top waves
As it beats toward the caves
The sea foams frothy white at the wide open mouth
And when the wind blows from the south

You can almost hear the pirates song
When they use to visit the cave, but those years are long gone
That's where they use to hide their treasures
But now only the waves laps in at it's leisure

You once asked me,"why don't you explore the cave by the sea"
"To find diamonds and the gold that there might be"
I only shot you a smile
Because I knew all the while
I had all ready found my diamond
And around you my arms I tightened

But that was many years ago
And the winds of time did blow
It aged our bodies, and took you away
So I made that climb up hill today

To sit up under that old oak tree
To reminisce of what use to be
To hold tight the ghost of your memory
For that's one thing time can't take from me

Will we meet upon the green grass hill
Will you come and sit with me still
Underneath the old oak tree
We can sit and gaze at the sea
We can watch the white top waves
As it beats toward the caves
The sea foams frothy white at the wide open mouth
And when the wind blows from the south

You can almost hear the pirates song
When they use to visit the cave, but those years are long gone
That's where they use to hide their treasures
But now only the waves laps in at it's leisure

You once asked me,"why don't you explore the cave by the sea"
"To find diamonds and the gold that there might be"
I only shot you a smile
Because I knew all the while
I had all ready found my diamond
And around you my arms I tightened

But that was many years ago
And the winds of time did blow
It aged our bodies, and took you away
So I made that climb up hill today

To sit up under that old oak tree
To reminisce of what use to be
To hold tight the ghost of your memory
For that's one thing time can't take from me

Will we meet upon the green grass hill
Will you come and sit with me still
Underneath the old oak tree
We can sit and gaze at the sea
We can watch the white top waves
As it beats toward the caves
The sea foams frothy white at the wide open mouth
And when the wind blows from the south

You can almost hear the pirates song
When they use to visit the cave, but those years are long gone
That's where they use to hide their treasures
But now only the waves laps in at it's leisure

You once asked me,"why don't you explore the cave by the sea"
"To find diamonds and the gold that there might be"
I only shot you a smile
Because I knew all the while
I had all ready found my diamond
And around you my arms I tightened

But that was many years ago
And the winds of time did blow
It aged our bodies, and took you away
So I made that climb up hill today

To sit up under that old oak tree
To reminisce of what use to be
To hold tight the ghost of your memory
For that's one thing time can't take from me

Will we meet upon the green grass hill
Will you come and sit with me still
Underneath the old oak tree
We can sit and gaze at the sea
We can watch the white top waves
As it beats toward the caves
The sea foams frothy white at the wide open mouth
And when the wind blows from the south

You can almost hear the pirates song
When they use to visit the cave, but those years are long gone
That's where they use to hide their treasures
But now only the waves laps in at it's leisure

You once asked me,"why don't you explore the cave by the sea"
"To find diamonds and the gold that there might be"
I only shot you a smile
Because I knew all the while
I had all ready found my diamond
And around you my arms I tightened

But that was many years ago
And the winds of time did blow
It aged our bodies, and took you away
So I made that climb up hill today

To sit up under that old oak tree
To reminisce of what use to be
To hold tight the ghost of your memory
For that's one thing time can't take from me

Leave the past behind you they say
You'll be much better off that way

But they really have no clue
Of the one that does pursue
If in my past he would stay
I'd celebrate that day

Because one of my mistakes
Made sure in my future he had a stake
He's the ***** donor of three of my kids
An abusive alcoholic, that still seems to have more to give

He finds me every two or three years
To see if he can rise my fears
I never wish harm upon another human
But he left my life in ruins

I was lucky enough to escape
His clutch
But he still seeks me out to keep in touch
To make sure the scars haven't healed to much

And make new ones of his choosing
He knows exactly what he's doing
I've sent him to jail many a time
But the punishment never fits the crime
And if your wonder why it is now, he's on my mind
Well,it's been three years and it's just about my birthday
And I'm sure his on his way!!!

A most gracefully bird, but not of the air
White caped waves are his clouds
Water proof feathers is what he wears
He stands on the beach mighty proud
His wings won't let him fly
But through the ocean he quickly glides
You'll never see him in the sky
Behind the corral is where he hids
When lion seals are on the prowl
His play ground is a winter wonderland
He is by far the best dressed fowl
With his dashing tuxedo he looks mighty grand
By design he was denied freedom of fight
But that my friend doesn't make him sad
For in the ocean so deep he reaches new heights
The icy slides are his launch pad
He certainly is a wonderful bird
To call him anything else would be absurd

Deep within the woods there is the perfect rock
It is under the tallest tree, right next to a small stream
Worn smooth by years and hours of sitting, by the shyest little girl
For when she was there time would stop, she had no need for a clock
She would sit for hours under the great tree's shade
Reading every book she could get her hands on
Although her body remained on that stone
Her mind was far away, the woods around her would fade

She was a detective, solving the hardest case
She was once a Queen and had tea with those She knighted
She rode a dragon and waged war on the wicked mage
She sailed the giant waves of the seven seas
She climbed to the top of Mount Everest
She sat astride the most beautiful mighty wild stallion
She fought a mighty mid evil battle brought the King to his knees

Yes that stone was very smooth
For out in those woods was her escape
The birds singing there sweet songs, the stream babbling all faded to back ground noise
Those books always her mood and mind could soothe

You found my secret talents that I hide
Every one of them I make sure is applied
You make me feel so alive
After all our desire can't be denied
I enjoy the pleasure you provide
Being on top, I love the ride
Ooohhh, to feel the power of the slip and slide
Loving the feeling of you inside
Our bodies mesh as we collide
As in and out you gently glide
No position do we leave untried
Until at last, at a ****** we arrive
We hold on to each other for dear life, as the passion slowly subsides

In this game there is no winner
There is only sorrow in the razor blades glimmer
But the sting of the flesh is a manageable pain
Unlike the one in my brain
That makes me quake
My hands to shake

But with the blade, my hands become steady
I brace for the slice, I get myself ready
Then I create my art, the flesh is my canvas
Most think this is total madness

But with the pain now in my flesh
For awhile my brain can rest
With the flow
My anguish goes
The thin red lines, allow me to survive another day
It just the price I pay

In this game there is no winner
There is only sorrow in the razor blades glimmer
But the sting of the flesh is a manageable pain
Unlike the one in my brain
That makes me quake
My hands to shake

But with the blade, my hands become steady
I brace for the slice, I get myself ready
Then I create my art, the flesh is my canvas
Most think this is total madness

But with the pain now in my flesh
For awhile my brain can rest
With the flow
My anguish goes
The thin red lines, allow me to survive another day
It just the price I pay

The rain it pitter patters
Against my window splatters
And the only thing that really matters

Is your not here with me
It's like the sky could see
And started crying so soft and slowly

The rain it pitter patters
Against my window splatters
And the only thing that really matters

Is your not here with me
It's like the sky could see
And started crying so soft and slowly

Every atom in my body aches for you
I fall more in love everyday, it's true
It's because you can see right through

All the scars and all the pain
And the darkness in me that reigns
Still your love for me you maintain

I seen your soul and heart
In your poems, your art
You are my missing part

For we are soul connected
I gave you my heart, you fiercely protected
Your all consuming love was so unexpected

As the sky cries for us slowly
All I want to do is hold you closely
I know forever you will be my one and only

Here I stand a on the edge again
Wishing I didn't have to swim
The sharks are showing their fins

Wish I could just end it all
I'm already fully in the fall
No one hears my screams, my call

I just want it to be over
Lay me down in the sweet clover
Do it now before I'm sober

I can't take the pursue
All that's left inside is ruptured
Leave me for the rapture

You walk with purpose down my street
Thought you wanted to taste all my sweets
Like every other man I meet
That on their wife they want to cheat

You choose me, why I do not know
But on me you did bestow
Your surgically sharp knife leave rivers that flows

Me, you saw fit to disembowell
All that was heard was my painful howl
You ****** that knife into my gut
Made a smooth quick upper cut

I watched my intestines hit the floor
You calmly walked right out the door
I was left with the messy gore
Waves of panic hit my minds shore

As the realization that my life was over
No more looking for that four leaf clover
Nothing mattered any more
This act of yours I do deplore

I grab my body's innards, to shove them back
But didn't seem to have the knack
Such a sad way to end my life
By the blade of Jacks shiny knife

You walk with purpose down my street
Thought you wanted to taste all my sweets
Like every other man I meet
That on their wife they want to cheat

You choose me, why I do not know
But on me you did bestow
Your surgically sharp knife leave rivers that flows

Me, you saw fit to disembowell
All that was heard was my painful howl
You ****** that knife into my gut
Made a smooth quick upper cut

I watched my intestines hit the floor
You calmly walked right out the door
I was left with the messy gore
Waves of panic hit my minds shore

As the realization that my life was over
No more looking for that four leaf clover
Nothing mattered any more
This act of yours I do deplore

I grab my body's innards, to shove them back
But didn't seem to have the knack
Such a sad way to end my life
By the blade of Jacks shiny knife

Please pass me the spoon
I need a hug from Jesus and I need it soon
My body needs to relax till it forgets to breath
Don't worry about the marks you can cover them with sleeves
A little pick and the pain will all fade away
Let me nod out, I'll deal with it another day
Let my mind get lost in the sway
It's the ritual of the needle and the spoon
It's the hug from Jesus that can't come to soon

Please pass me the spoon
I need a hug from Jesus and I need it soon
My body needs to relax till it forgets to breath
Don't worry about the marks you can cover them with sleeves
A little ***** and the pain will all fade away
Let me nod out, I'll deal with it another day
Let my mind get lost in the sway
It's the ritual of the needle and the spoon
It's the hug from Jesus that can't come to soon

I've been shattered into a trillion pieces
The pain constantly increases

My heart is tattered and torn
I've weeped and I have mourned

I've seen *** used as weapons
But I'm not gonna learn their lessons

Scars have been inflicted
But I refuse to be vindictive

This world has left me battered and bruised
I could be callous and rude but that road I won't choose

There's been so many, many wrongs
But I'm still holding on strong

With hope and with faith
Even with horror as a wraith

This world has to much pain
So in my broken heart, love will reign

And with forgiveness, I'll steal their power
They can not make me stay in the corner and cower

I seen her there in that rocking chair
Grey hair flying everywhere
She was rocking as fast as could be
Letting out shrill squeaks of glee

Beneath the wrinkles you could still see
The child she so long ago use to be
In her eyes was a glint
Of a woman hell bent
On squeezing out every once of fun
She knew her time was almost done
But for today she hadn't a care
Let the people stare

I watched the grandkids climb onboard
As Grandma throttled up and the soared
For imagination was her most prized possession
She was leaving it to her grandkids, you could see it in their expression

This lesson from their wild haired grandma that they got
Would never ever be forgot
As that rocking chair flew back and fourth
Leaving the gravity of earth
Headed for an adventure out in the galaxy
Sharing Grandma's fantasy

The new wounds I made last night
Reminds me today things are not right
Not right in my life, not right in my mind
Hell, to my own self I can't be kind

The sting of my new scars remind me all day
That I am still living in the gray
I'm still alive, but not really living
The blade is so unforgiving

So I trudge through my time at work
Dealing with the many jerks
Begging the time to fly faster
Trying to elude disaster
For over my emotions I am no master

I just want to run back to my hole
It's the safest place I know
But that is also where my pain hides
A million tears I've cried
Where the razor slides
Where I almost died

But there is no one there to see the mess I make
How the ground beneath me quakes
Or to hear the screams that from my lips brakes
When from the nightmares that I wake

No one throws me a bone
I'm so very much alone
But thats ok
No one can deal with me anyway

Swimming in the sea of equilibrium
I want to stay here for the next millennium
Right here in the middle, not to low, not to high
Between the deep dark bottom, and the bright blue sky

You can come and join me
On this calm glass sea
We can float here together
Just falling like a feather
We can stay forever
In this tranquil sea of heaven

Spring came into her beautiful life
She started to grow strong, such a wonderful sight
Before she knew it the summer Sun's rays
Coaxed her to blossom and bloom, the sun had that magical way

The summer of her life was grand
She stretched herself as tall as she could stand
Her beauty was quite beyond compare
She glimmered so bright it was almost a glare

Before she knew it, it was the autumn of life
All her memories were rife
Still she had abundant beauty, though her petals were starting to droop
Being pulled down to gravity's stoop
Still she enjoyed the the cooler days
And leaned towards the sun's rays

Winter fiercely came one night
Even though she put up a hell of a fight
The snow was to heavy
She could no longer be counted among the bevy

She sadly just wilted away
And fell into her bed of decay
Her ravishing petals now lay on the ground and decompose
My gorgeous scarlet rose

Spring came into her beautiful life
She started to grow strong, such a wonderful sight
Before she knew it the summer Sun's rays
Coaxed her to blossom and bloom, the sun had that magical way

The summer of her life was grand
She stretched herself as tall as she could stand
Her beauty was quite beyond compare
She glimmered so bright it was almost a glare

Before she knew it, it was the autumn of life
All her memories were rife
Still she had abundant beauty, though her petals were starting to droop
Being pulled down to gravity's stoop
Still she enjoyed the the cooler days
And leaned towards the sun's rays

Winter fiercely came one night
Even though she put up a hell of a fight
The snow was to heavy
She could no longer be counted among the bevy

She sadly just wilted away
And fell into her bed of decay
Her ravishing petals now lay on the ground and decompose
My gorgeous scarlet rose

Spring came into her beautiful life
She started to grow strong, such a wonderful sight
Before she knew it the summer Sun's rays
Coaxed her to blossom and bloom, the sun had that magical way

The summer of her life was grand
She stretched herself as tall as she could stand
Her beauty was quite beyond compare
She glimmered so bright it was almost a glare

Before she knew it, it was the autumn of life
All her memories were rife
Still she had abundant beauty, though her petals were starting to droop
Being pulled down to gravity's stoop
Still she enjoyed the the cooler days
And leaned towards the sun's rays

Winter fiercely came one night
Even though she put up a hell of a fight
The snow was to heavy
She could no longer be counted among the bevy

She sadly just wilted away
And fell into her bed of decay
Her ravishing petals now lay on the ground and decompose
My gorgeous scarlet rose

It was a cart once made for shopping
Now lost and long forgoten
It was a cart once silver and shiny
Now old, disgusting and grimy

She found it there in an unused lot
It was exactly what she had sought
In it she placed her worldly belongings
Including her hopes, her dreams, and longings

She took it with her wherever she went
Hours organizing it where spent
Not one thing about that cart was inept
She knew every scrap of paper, and were it was kept
There was room for her clothes, she had very few
Far less than anyone knew
A spot for the table scraps she managed to find
Who knew you could live on less than a dime

But there in the middle you'll find two old tattered tins
Her most prized possessions where tucked safely within

One tin was for the past and things that are no more
With child like eyes, she'd peek in and explore
For both Joy and Sorrow are contained inside
Amongst the Polaroids of life, a lock of child's hair did reside

The other was for her hopes and dreams
They carried her on, when there seemed to be no means
Even when all the dreams eventually explode and collide
Hope will still be standing strong by her side

Her life as it is now, out here on the streets
Was unexpected, not planned......the memory repeats

A bright sunny day
Soaking up the sun's rays
Both out by their pool
Him sitting at the bar on a stool
But little boys sure do like to giggle
They squirm, and they wiggle

Her out stretched fingers grazed his shirt as he fell
Her screams of anguish no one could quail
As she held his limp body pleading for him to open his eyes
Screaming at the heavens..... WHY.... WHY.... WHY

Now on this block you can find her every day
Pushing that shopping cart as she limps and she sways
Come bare witness to the sad aftermath
One split second, changed a life's path

©Pauline Morris

It was a cart once made for shopping
Now lost and long forgoten
It was a cart once silver and shiny
Now old, disgusting and grimy

She found it there in an unused lot
It was exactly what she had sought
In it she placed her worldly belongings
Including her hopes, her dreams, and longings

She took it with her wherever she went
Hours organizing it where spent
Not one thing about that cart was inept
She knew every scrap of paper, and were it was kept
There was room for her clothes, she had very few
Far less than anyone knew
A spot for the table scraps she managed to find
Who knew you could live on less than a dime

But there in the middle you'll find two old tattered tins
Her most prized possessions where tucked safely within

One tin was for the past and things that are no more
With child like eyes, she'd peek in and explore
For both Joy and Sorrow are contained inside
Amongst the Polaroids of life, a lock of child's hair did reside

The other was for her hopes and dreams
They carried her on, when there seemed to be no means
Even when all the dreams eventually explode and collide
Hope will still be standing strong by her side

Her life as it is now, out here on the streets
Was unexpected, not planned...... the memory repeats

A bright sunny day
Soaking up the sun's rays
Both out by their pool
Him sitting at the bar on a stool
But little boys sure do like to giggle
They squirm, and they wiggle

Her out stretched fingers grazed his shirt as he fell
Her screams of anguish no one could quail
As she held his limp body pleading for him to open his eyes
Screaming at the heavens..... WHY.... WHY.... WHY

Now on this block you can find her every day
Pushing that shopping cart as she limps and she sways
Come bare witness to the sad aftermath
One split second, changed a life's path

©Pauline Russell

The framed sign where I work says "smile it's time to be happy"
I see it every single day, it's so freaking sappy
I look at it in disgust
A simple sign that means so much

It reminds me of all I want, but can't obtain
Everyday it leaves me feeling a bit more drained
A bit more inhumane, a bit more broken
It's sad how it makes me feel, this simple token

Somedays I want to rip it off the wall
I'll just tell them it got broke in the fall
Other days I pray it will come true
Then I would be happy just like you

But still there it hangs
And every day it says the same
Made to endure it's mocking words
I know to others my rant seems so absurd

But in the belly of the beast it's impossible to smile
When drowning in all this bile

The framed sign where I work says "smile it's time to be happy"
I see it every single day, it's so freaking sappy
I look at it in disgust
A simple sign that means so much

It reminds me of all I want, but can't obtain
Everyday it leaves me feeling a bit more drained
A bit more inhumane, a bit more broken
It's sad how it makes me feel, this simple token

Somedays I want to rip it off the wall
I'll just tell them it got broke in the fall
Other days I pray it will come true
Then I would be happy just like you

But still there it hangs
And every day it says the same
Made to endure it's mocking words
I know to others my rant seems so absurd

But in the belly of the beast it's impossible to smile
When drowning in all this bile

You'll be going off the deep end  soon
I can see it in your motion
It's as sure as the influence of the moon
As it pulls and tuggs on the ocean

That look in your eyes
Has me so worried
I can see past your disguise
But your keeping the lines blurry

I wish I could stop the cycle
I wish I could stop your spin
But it's almost primal
The situation you're in

Don't put up your facade
From me you have nothing to hide
I know how far up that mountain you've clawed
I know the tears you've cried

I can hear your silent scream
It echoes in my head
I know what it means
The darkness wants fed

I wish I could stop the cycle
I wish I could stop your spin
But it's almost primal
The situation you're in

Just remember in your dark abyss
I'll be right by your side
My love please don't dismiss
In me you can always confide

I'll be that shoulder you can lean on
That hand to grasp
Together we will see the dawn
As onto each other we clasp

I wish I could stop the cycle
I wish I could stop your spin
But it's almost primal
The situation you're in

The sky opened up and swallowed me whole
That was ages and ages ago
I tumble in the darkness going to and fro
Trying to endure the sorrow as it grows

The clown grabbed my hand
Said "let's make a stand"
"In this topsy turvy land"
His smile was so menacing, away I ran

The beast searched me out, yes I was found
He opened up his razor lined snout and gobbled me down
In his belly I'm splashing around
In all this bile I'm sure to drown

All good words and intentions where so botched
My loved ones could only stand and watch
As the universe raised it up a notch
Reached down and grabbed me by the crotch

Now I'm hoping the sky will swallow me whole
Don't search me out in that darkest hole
As I step off the edge and ride the flow
With a smile on my face I will be happy to go

You became the light on this darkness that is me
Like the power the lighthouse has over the sea
You burst into my life so unexpectedly

Your smile chases away my angriest clouds
My anguish can no longer scream out loud
At the sight of you my demons just cowed

I get lost in your sea of blue
Sparkling my way in the brightest of hues
Your eye's fall on me like the sweetest dew

Your kisses are smoldering and cool on my lips
Our passion becomes an eclipse
As your gentle touch lingers there on my hips

What a beautifully experience you have become
To your magical way I've succumbed
I marvel at all you are helping me to overcome

You are the light to my darkness
The smile to my sadness
The strength to my weakness
With you my nights will never be starless

Last night I watched the storm
The flashing of lightning that lit up the sky
The rumbling of thunder that shook my floor
Then every softly at first the beat of the rain
like the rhythm of a drum
It grew more intense, the wind joined in
So much lightning made my room look like day
The rain was so deafening like the drums of mad men
It was all so beautifully violent
I couldn't help but look on in awe
The chaos of it all pulled at my being
Till I had no choice but to go out and join in
The wind driven rain penetrated my skin
The lightning and thunder electorfied my soul
For a few split secounds I was alive again

The rain comes splattering in through my window, like a thousand cool tiny kisses

My skin glisten

It begins as the sun goes down in the coal black inky darkness of night

Layer of fright

Thunder so loud it rattles the windows, shakes the room

Sonic boom

Bright white hot lighting splits the night into

Darkness resumes

The rain pours down trying to drown everything, that's for certain

Glistening  curtain

The wind is bending the trees to it's will, making house shingles fly

Look to the sky

Destruction is on the horizon, The finger of God is on the ground

No safe haven found

The funnel cloud again ascends into the heavens, leaving behind a shattered earth

What cost, what worth

The morning light brings silence, only the sounds of the mothers crying

Fathers sighing

Broken boards, tattered dreams, toppled trees

What's become of me

You'll find my body in the field, I sailed the winds, soul ripped from my mortal shell

**** up to heaven, thrown down to hell